|
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Ruxendil_Thoorg
Dor-Lomin
Feb 10 2013, 2:32pm
Post #27 of 45
(840 views)
Shortcut
|
|
It all boils down to this question: who is better at forging metal weapons and objects?
[In reply to]
|
Can't Post
|
|
DWARVES: You've got to be joking. Dwarves are the best at forging ... anything!
ELVES: Ah, ahem, how many Rings of Power did the Dwarves make? And how many famous, accomplished swords with names? *cough Thorin wielded Orcrist cough*
DWARVES: He picked it up out of a Troll hoard out of convenience. So basically he didn't have anything else handy and he obtained it by dumpster-diving. Who wants a sword that GLOWS when foes are near, alerting them to your presence? And Orcrist's glow didn't even WORK. If Thorin had a Dwarf-made axe handy, he would have chosen that instead, and you know it.
ELVES: Why didn't he bring such an axe with him then? Yep, Dwarven metal weapons are so good that he chose to keep an ACTUAL TREE BRANCH FOR HIS PERSONAL SHIELD, very impressive endorsement of Dwarven metalworks there.
DWARVES: Oh yeah? Two words for you: Got mithril?
ELVES: Two more words for you: Durin's Bane?
It only got uglier and ugler after that.
A bag is like a hole that you can carry with you.
http://newboards.theonering.net/...forum_view_expanded;
|
|
|
The Prancing Pony
Ossiriand
Feb 10 2013, 6:07pm
Post #28 of 45
(825 views)
Shortcut
|
To braid or not to braid? And who can do it prettier. 
"If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world."
|
|
|
Ruxendil_Thoorg
Dor-Lomin
Feb 10 2013, 7:18pm
Post #30 of 45
(819 views)
Shortcut
|
|
It's all about their disagreement over who is more closely related to a particular celebrity.
[In reply to]
|
Can't Post
|
|
"He hired US to be his helpers (our distant cousins actually, smaller and more kid-friendly. Elves nonetheless.)"
"He is quite clearly Dwarf! Just look at his kinsman and spitting image: Balin."
"Well, the beasts he chose to pull his sleigh were inspired by the traditional mount ridden by the Elvenking of the woodland realm in Mirkwood."
"Oh really. Well, the whole idea of using a sleigh came from us."
"How??? Dwarves don't ride sleighs."
"No we don't, that was the Brown wizard Radagast. But Radagast appeared in OUR story and the idea was passed on because of OUR stories."
"That's a bit of a stretch. Have you read the Clemens poem? It says in black and white: a jolly old ELF."
"Have you seen the Ferrell movie? ANYBODY could be mistaken for an Elf!"
Et cetera.
A bag is like a hole that you can carry with you.
http://newboards.theonering.net/...forum_view_expanded;
|
|
|
Ruxendil_Thoorg
Dor-Lomin
Feb 10 2013, 7:47pm
Post #31 of 45
(896 views)
Shortcut
|
|
Started with the Elves' cultural misapprehension re: traditional Dwarven dancing styles
[In reply to]
|
Can't Post
|
|
The Elves made an error in encouraging the Dwarves to demonstrate what the Elves mistook for a traditional Dwarf dance. The Dwarves got upset when they had to explain:
"No, we do NOT traditionally dance in pairs by having one Dwarf perch on another Dwarf's shoulders and then have the top Dwarf wear a long trench coat and hat so that they look like one tall dancing man!"
A bag is like a hole that you can carry with you.
http://newboards.theonering.net/...forum_view_expanded;
|
|
|
Ziggy Stardust
Mithlond
Feb 11 2013, 12:00am
Post #32 of 45
(794 views)
Shortcut
|
The Elves preferred the Beatles, and the Dwarves preferred the Rolling Stones. (As for me, I like both.) 
|
|
|
zarabia
Dor-Lomin
Feb 11 2013, 7:24am
Post #33 of 45
(792 views)
Shortcut
|
I must admit that if I had been drinking something while reading, "That would be my wife", there would have been an embarrassing snarf situation.  Give a person some warning next time
"The question isn't where, Constable, but when." - Inspector Spacetime
|
|
|
zarabia
Dor-Lomin
Feb 11 2013, 7:28am
Post #34 of 45
(777 views)
Shortcut
|
about buttering toast on top vs. buttering toast on the bottom?
"The question isn't where, Constable, but when." - Inspector Spacetime
|
|
|
zarabia
Dor-Lomin
Feb 11 2013, 7:33am
Post #35 of 45
(782 views)
Shortcut
|
Most people I know like them both, but when pressed to choose just one, things seem to get heated pretty quickly.
"The question isn't where, Constable, but when." - Inspector Spacetime
|
|
|
NottaSackville
Doriath
Feb 11 2013, 1:06pm
Post #36 of 45
(774 views)
Shortcut
|
 Happiness: money matters, but less than we think and not in the way that we think. Family is important and so are friends, while envy is toxic -- and so is excessive thinking. Beaches are optional. Trust is not. Neither is gratitude. - The Geography of Bliss by Eric Weiner as summarized by Lily Fairbairn. And a bit of the Hobbit reading thrown in never hurts. - NottaSackville
|
|
|
Ruxendil_Thoorg
Dor-Lomin
Feb 12 2013, 4:00am
Post #37 of 45
(767 views)
Shortcut
|
Here's an idea. Everybody on these Middle Earth Conspiracy and other game threads should get special monitor and keyboard protectors: the TOLKBLOCKER (TM). It would be a special clear polymer membrane sheet that blocks spit-takes. It could be customized with translucent Tolkien-themed laser graphics. That might discourage game participants from spitting coffee all over, say, a close-up glamour portrait of Thorin for example if that's what floats your boat.
Thanks zarabia, and I'm glad you didn't ruin your computer peripherals this time! 
A bag is like a hole that you can carry with you.
http://newboards.theonering.net/...forum_view_expanded;
|
|
|
zarabia
Dor-Lomin
Feb 13 2013, 6:41am
Post #38 of 45
(749 views)
Shortcut
|
Camp Viggo = tens of millions / Camp Stuart = his immediate family?
I've liked Stuart Townsend in some things, but what was PJ thinking to even consider him for Aragorn?! 
"The question isn't where, Constable, but when." - Inspector Spacetime
|
|
|
zarabia
Dor-Lomin
Feb 13 2013, 6:45am
Post #39 of 45
(745 views)
Shortcut
|
But my dignity that was more in danger than my keyboard. I'm afraid there's no product out there to keep me from looking uncool.
"The question isn't where, Constable, but when." - Inspector Spacetime
|
|
|
Brethil
Gondolin
Feb 14 2013, 5:01pm
Post #41 of 45
(732 views)
Shortcut
|
That is priceless!!!!!!!!!!!!! Weaponsmithing for Dummies...please please publish it.
...she took the point at once, but she also took the spoons.
|
|
|
Ruxendil_Thoorg
Dor-Lomin
Feb 14 2013, 10:55pm
Post #42 of 45
(725 views)
Shortcut
|
Hehe thanks!
Publish which, though? (Probably you meant the jokes, as opposed to an instruction manual of weaponsmithing for the "remedial learner", so:): any suggestions on how one might go about publishing something like that? Is there a magazine or something that features that kind of thing? If so, I imagine many of us here might try to publish in it.
Somebody more knowledgeable than me might be able to write a how-to book for the "metallurgically limited" on the art of metalshaping, in a well-meaning but blatantly condescending tone as addressed by an Elf to a Dwarf. That would be pretty funny!
A bag is like a hole that you can carry with you.
http://newboards.theonering.net/...forum_view_expanded;
|
|
|
Brethil
Gondolin
Feb 15 2013, 3:11am
Post #43 of 45
(753 views)
Shortcut
|
what a great project. Will need one of those screen-protector doodads though or lots of spewed fluid will be sloshing about in my laptop. Consider writing it! It would be brilliant!
...she took the point at once, but she also took the spoons.
(This post was edited by Brethil on Feb 15 2013, 3:14am)
|
|
|
Draupne
Forum Admin
/ Moderator
Feb 17 2013, 3:30pm
Post #44 of 45
(705 views)
Shortcut
|
|
And which end of the egg you should break first. //
[In reply to]
|
Can't Post
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
