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Aye-and-begorraahua
Registered User
Mar 17 2007, 8:08pm
Post #1 of 16
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Middle-earth Conspiracy Theories
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While lurking invisible within the Mirkwood Elven-king's halls for weeks on end, Bilbo Baggins stumbled across secrets that he used against Thranduil for later gain. What were these devastating secrets that the Elven-king was desperate to have remain unknown?
(BTW, happy St Paddy's Day all!)
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Annael
Elvenhome
Mar 17 2007, 8:17pm
Post #2 of 16
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oh wait, Ezpeleta already did . . .
Only a real man would dare do his morning power walk in a puffy shirt.
NARF and member of Deplorable Cultus since 1967
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a.s.
Doriath
Mar 17 2007, 8:54pm
Post #4 of 16
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blond hair dye with a "preferred customer" discount sticker on each box!
"an seileachan"
Everybody's wondering what and where they all came from.
Everybody's worried 'bout where they're gonna go when the whole thing's done.
No one knows for certain, and so it's all the same to me:
I think I'll just let the mystery be.
~~~~Iris DeMent
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GaladrielTX
Dor-Lomin
Mar 18 2007, 1:46am
Post #5 of 16
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~~~~~~~~
I used to be GaladrielTX, but I lost my TX and an hour over the weekend. Stupid Daylight Saving Time!
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Penthe
Mithlond
Mar 18 2007, 2:04am
Post #6 of 16
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Ay, ay a Balrog has come. And he's drunk all the wine, eaten all the snacks and bored us all senseless.
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L. Ron Halfelven
Hithlum
Mar 18 2007, 2:08am
Post #7 of 16
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"I happen to know that not all those barrels of yours contain wine...
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One word from me to Wilderland Revenue and you're up the river."
Fight for us! And regain your honor, learn valuable technical skills, and qualify for up to four years' college tuition! What say you?
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grammaboodawg
Elvenhome
Mar 18 2007, 1:24pm
Post #8 of 16
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Current stock certificates in Iron Hills Mining, Inc. //
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Trust him... The Hobbit is coming!
"Barney Snow was here." ~Hug like a hobbit!~ "In my heaven..."
TORn's Observations Lists
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greendragon
Sr. Staff
Mar 18 2007, 4:38pm
Post #10 of 16
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He was already actually dead himself...
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And the aliens are killed by water and the outside world was really the modern world and he has a twin brother and the 'real' world is just a fake created to keep us all happy and there was only one guy running fight club.
Oh, and Thranduil was actually Kesyer Souze.
Much theatre revenue would be lost if these secrets were ever to be given away...
(Spot the movie! And don't worry - if the spoiler here is for a film you haven't seen you know which film it is so it won't spoil the movie for you!! Apart from Fight Club - but noone hasn't seen that yet, right??) 
'There are older and fouler things than orcs in the deep places of my fridge...'
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silneldor
Gondolin
Mar 18 2007, 4:47pm
Post #11 of 16
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The lucretive toupee production for aging dwarves were fabricated from
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spider hairs and glue from reconstituted web .
"Tolkien, like Lewis, believed that, through story, the real world would become a more magical place, full of meaning. We see its patterns and colors in a fresh way. The recovery of a true view of the world applies both to individual things, like hills and stones, and to the cosmic - the depths of space and time itself. For in sub-creation, in Tolkien's view, there is a "survey" of space and time. Reality is captured on a miniature scale. Through stories like The Lord of the Rings, a renewed view of things is given, illuminating the homely, the spiritial, the physical, and the moral dimensions of the world."
Tolkien and C.S. Lewis- The Gift of Friendship -Duriez
The magnificent beech
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Darkstone
Elvenhome
Mar 18 2007, 7:03pm
Post #12 of 16
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The polaroids of him in a fake beard with the caption "Spank me, I'm a naughty dwarf!"
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“Such is the tragi-comedy of our situation - we continue to clamour for those very qualities we are rendering impossible. … In a sort of ghastly simplicity we remove the organ and demand the function. We make men without chests and expect of them virtue and enterprise. We laugh at honour and are shocked to find traitors in our midst."
-The Abolition of Man, C.S. Lewis
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Samantha Baggins
Lindon
Mar 19 2007, 2:27am
Post #13 of 16
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Thranduil had managed to obtain Arwen's purple dress and Elrond's tiara at one of the feasts...//
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______________________________
*looks around*
Who cleaned up Bag End?
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Idril Celebrindal
Dor-Lomin
Mar 19 2007, 5:12pm
Post #15 of 16
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I knew you were going to post that .....
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.... But I had to look anyhow. 
With caffeine, all things are possible.
The pity of Bilbo will screw up the fate of many.
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ROFLMAO ... then fall off chair! 