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The One Ring Forums: Tolkien Topics: Main:
Middle-earth Conspiracy Theories
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Ataahua
Superuser / Moderator


Nov 27 2010, 7:24pm

Post #1 of 39 (5879 views)
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Middle-earth Conspiracy Theories Can't Post

What was the real reason that Galadriel and Celeborn wanted no visitors in Lothlorien?

Celebrimbor: "Pretty rings..."
Dwarves: "Pretty rings..."
Men: "Pretty rings..."
Sauron: "Mine's better."

"Ah, how ironic, the addictive qualities of Sauron’s master weapon led to its own destruction. Which just goes to show, kids - if you want two small and noble souls to succeed on a mission of dire importance... send an evil-minded b*****d with them too." - Gandalf's Diaries, final par, by Ufthak.


Ataahua's stories


Darkstone
Immortal


Nov 27 2010, 9:46pm

Post #2 of 39 (1504 views)
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It was the maid's millenium off so the forest was a mess. / [In reply to] Can't Post

 

******************************************
I met a Balrog on the stair.
He had some wings that weren't there.
They weren't there again today.
I wish he would just fly away.


grammaboodawg
Immortal


Nov 27 2010, 10:24pm

Post #3 of 39 (1308 views)
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Visitors get so comfy, the never wanna leave! // [In reply to] Can't Post

 


sample sample

I really need these new films to take me back to, and not re-introduce me to, that magical world.



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Unused Scenes



Gimli'sBox
Gondor


Nov 27 2010, 10:47pm

Post #4 of 39 (1242 views)
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They needed a lot of time to curl/straighten their hair.// [In reply to] Can't Post

 

Roast chicken?!

You're taller. Who? You. Then what? Then me! I've always been taller than you. Pippin, everyone knows you're the short one. I'm the tall one. Please Merry. Your what? Three foot six at the most. Whereas I'm pushing three seven. Three eight! Three foot eight! You did something.

It's Latin. Loosely translated, it means... we cheat.

"Strange treasures in this fair world appear, strange all, and new to me." That is a poem by Thomas Traherne and I have absolutely no idea what it's about. But, when I was small I was made to learn it by heart so I don't see why you shouldn't suffer too.


Wraith Buster
Gondor


Nov 27 2010, 10:54pm

Post #5 of 39 (1157 views)
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They didn't want anyone to know they had bad moods too!// [In reply to] Can't Post

 

I do believe if our honorable friend continues to scrape the bottom of the barrel for objections he is in danger of getting splinters under his fingernails.



Ethel Duath
Valinor


Nov 27 2010, 11:09pm

Post #6 of 39 (1233 views)
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The flet contractor left tire tracks all over Cerin Amroth// [In reply to] Can't Post

 


TheNazgul
Rivendell


Nov 28 2010, 2:10am

Post #7 of 39 (1360 views)
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The last time they had a visitor thier wedding got crashed// [In reply to] Can't Post

 P.S wraith buster don't bust me i have hobbits to stab!!

Rest in peace RonniePhotobucket

(This post was edited by TheNazgul on Nov 28 2010, 2:11am)


Gimli'sBox
Gondor


Nov 28 2010, 4:09am

Post #8 of 39 (1298 views)
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Oh that's GREAT!!!!!!!// [In reply to] Can't Post

 

Roast chicken?!

You're taller. Who? You. Then what? Then me! I've always been taller than you. Pippin, everyone knows you're the short one. I'm the tall one. Please Merry. Your what? Three foot six at the most. Whereas I'm pushing three seven. Three eight! Three foot eight! You did something.

It's Latin. Loosely translated, it means... we cheat.

"Strange treasures in this fair world appear, strange all, and new to me." That is a poem by Thomas Traherne and I have absolutely no idea what it's about. But, when I was small I was made to learn it by heart so I don't see why you shouldn't suffer too.


Eowyn of Penns Woods
Valinor


Nov 28 2010, 4:15am

Post #9 of 39 (1289 views)
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O, hai! [In reply to] Can't Post

Which foul dwimmerlaik are you? *smiles sweetly*

**********************************


NARF
NABOUF
Not a TORns*b!
Certified Curmudgeon


TolkienOtaku
Rivendell


Nov 28 2010, 6:25pm

Post #10 of 39 (1237 views)
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Let's just say they needed a lot of alone time. [In reply to] Can't Post

Nudge, nudge, wink, wink, know what I mean?

So many are still waiting for their new beginning. Their birth by sleep. Even me, and even you.


SirDennisC
Half-elven


Nov 28 2010, 11:06pm

Post #11 of 39 (1212 views)
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The lights: [In reply to] Can't Post

one visitor who knows a hydroponic lamp when they see one and it's game over.


(This post was edited by SirDennisC on Nov 28 2010, 11:07pm)


Wraith Buster
Gondor


Nov 28 2010, 11:44pm

Post #12 of 39 (1222 views)
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"I will kill you if you touch them!!!" [In reply to] Can't Post


In Reply To
P.S wraith buster don't bust me i have hobbits to stab!!


"You fool! No man can kill me. Die now!"
"I am no man!"


There's something strange and it don't look good! Who you gonna call? Wraith Buster!!

I do believe if our honorable friend continues to scrape the bottom of the barrel for objections he is in danger of getting splinters under his fingernails.



sador
Half-elven


Nov 29 2010, 7:18am

Post #13 of 39 (1178 views)
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Wikileaks journalists might uncover what really happened to Amroth. // [In reply to] Can't Post

 

"Welcome, and well met!" - Gloin.

The weekly discussion of The Lord of the Rings is back! Please join us in the Reading Room.

"Caras Galadhon is actually a fortress... I guess I always imagined it as more of a nice garden with lots of trees. But someone put some serious thought into defending that garden."
- Altaira.



Disa
The Shire


Nov 29 2010, 7:49am

Post #14 of 39 (1195 views)
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They have Jimmy Hoffa. [In reply to] Can't Post

And they're holding him indefinitely. The LoTR group were in a hurry, so there was no threat of discovery there. Galadriel is also known as Goldie the Gun, the Leader of the Elvish Mob. Her main cohort and consort Lord Celeborn, aka The Leaf Hacker, are shacked up in the woods, surrounded by their most loyal gang members in a last ditch effort to prevent the Middle Earth Brotherhood of Teamsters lead by Saruon himself, from takin' over the joint. They're armed with the latest magical wards and booby traps ("That's what I said! Setting booty traps!") in the remotest part of Lothlórien. Heart

Dwarrows forever!


.Ithilwen.
Rivendell


Nov 29 2010, 3:43pm

Post #15 of 39 (1152 views)
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They don't want the stalker fan paparazzi sneaking in and getting all the dirt on Galadriel's new match-maker reality show for Bravo... Her star alums being Aragorn and Arwen [In reply to] Can't Post



(This post was edited by .Ithilwen. on Nov 29 2010, 3:51pm)


Eruonen
Tol Eressea


Nov 29 2010, 5:29pm

Post #16 of 39 (1077 views)
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Lack of sewage....I am sure elves had little to no bio waste and they [In reply to] Can't Post

did not like such messes underfoot spoiling the
golden leaves and fouling their streams. It is hard to imagine Galadriel sitting on a chamber pot or over a hole in the ground....if she did...it probably was a perfumed passage...nothing foul out of her.


TheGoblinKing
Rohan

Nov 29 2010, 7:53pm

Post #17 of 39 (1227 views)
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The Elves Fear Aragorn [In reply to] Can't Post

The Elf men fear Strider for all Elvish women fall in love and not even Galadrial couldn't resist him and she was hoping Strider would come. It was Frodo who came so she turned evil for a second.

And also Mirkwood Elves have bad Gas and make the leaves fall off the Trees.

Also Boromir was known for Throwing parties and Spiked the water and Elves cannot hold there own againt's Gondor wine.


Darkstone
Immortal


Nov 30 2010, 1:48am

Post #18 of 39 (1110 views)
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Life insurance salesmen literally flocked to Lothlorien. / [In reply to] Can't Post

 

******************************************
I met a Balrog on the stair.
He had some wings that weren't there.
They weren't there again today.
I wish he would just fly away.


jacf182
Registered User

Nov 30 2010, 8:56pm

Post #19 of 39 (889 views)
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They were avoiding at all costs [In reply to] Can't Post

Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga's agents to consider Lothlorien as a possible location for concerts.

Wielder of the Flame of Anor


ABody
Registered User

Dec 1 2010, 2:08am

Post #20 of 39 (900 views)
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Their processing heavy water and plutonium [In reply to] Can't Post

Wink


Idril Celebrindal
Tol Eressea


Dec 1 2010, 4:48pm

Post #21 of 39 (882 views)
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10,000 years' worth of old newspapers and takeout containers are piled up everywhere! // [In reply to] Can't Post

 


With caffeine, all things are possible.

The pity of Bilbo will screw up the fate of many.

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting


Idril Celebrindal
Tol Eressea


Dec 1 2010, 4:49pm

Post #22 of 39 (814 views)
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Celeborn never got around to fixing that little problem with the plumbing .... // [In reply to] Can't Post

 


With caffeine, all things are possible.

The pity of Bilbo will screw up the fate of many.

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting


Arwen's daughter
Half-elven


Dec 1 2010, 7:00pm

Post #23 of 39 (842 views)
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They weren't allowed to admit tourists ever since that lawsuit caused by their lack of railings. // [In reply to] Can't Post

 



My LiveJournal
My Costuming Site
TORn's Costume Discussions Archive
The Screencap of the Day Schedule for November


StarElf
Rohan

Dec 5 2010, 8:02pm

Post #24 of 39 (866 views)
Shortcut
It was Because [In reply to] Can't Post

Lothlorien was really Middle Earth's Area 51. They were still hiding the spaceships and the bodies of dead aliens, along with all their fancy new Elvish technology, and disguising it to look like actual trees.


(This post was edited by StarElf on Dec 5 2010, 8:08pm)


Darkstone
Immortal


Dec 6 2010, 12:23am

Post #25 of 39 (756 views)
Shortcut
It was a big hassle gluing the ears on. / [In reply to] Can't Post

 

******************************************
I met a Balrog on the stair.
He had some wings that weren't there.
They weren't there again today.
I wish he would just fly away.

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