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Ataahua
Forum Admin
/ Moderator
Mar 31 2007, 7:40pm
Post #1 of 29
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Middle-earth Conspiracy Theories
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So just how did Beorn gain the ability to shape-change into a bear?
Celebrimbor: "Pretty rings..."
Dwarves: "Pretty rings..."
Men: "Pretty rings..."
Sauron: "Mine's better."
"Ah, how ironic, the addictive qualities of Sauron’s master weapon led to its own destruction. Which just goes to show, kids - if you want two small and noble souls to succeed on a mission of dire importance... send an evil-minded b*****d with them too." - Gandalf's Diaries, final par, by Ufthak.
Ataahua's stories
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Penthe
Mithlond
Mar 31 2007, 8:56pm
Post #2 of 29
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He ate too many chocolate Yogi Bears, and didn't start at the knees, please.
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greendragon
Sr. Staff
Mar 31 2007, 9:25pm
Post #4 of 29
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'There are older and fouler things than orcs in the deep places of my fridge...'
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Elberbeth
Dor-Lomin
Mar 31 2007, 10:51pm
Post #5 of 29
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He found a lamp, which gave him three wishes ... so what were the other two?/
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"There are some things that it is better to begin than to refuse, even though the end may be dark."
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Alnilam
Ossiriand
Mar 31 2007, 10:56pm
Post #6 of 29
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He enrolled in Tera West's shapeshifting class.
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But he wasn't a very good student, so he ended up turning into the wrong animal.
Alnilam's Realm
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weaver
Gondolin
Apr 1 2007, 12:37am
Post #7 of 29
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Transporter room malfunction...
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Weaver
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Morwen
Nargothrond
Apr 1 2007, 12:44am
Post #8 of 29
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Accidental blast of gamma radiation
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Well, it worked for the Hulk.
I wish you could have been there
When she opened up the door
And looked me in the face
Like she never did before
I felt about as welcome
As a Wal-Mart Superstore--John Prine
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Darkstone
Elvenhome
Apr 1 2007, 12:58am
Post #9 of 29
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During a full moon on the wild lonely moors of 100 Acre Wood.... /
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I met a Balrog on the stair
He had some wings that weren't there.
They weren't there again today.
I wish he would just fly away.
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dernwyn
Forum Admin
/ Moderator
Apr 1 2007, 2:10am
Post #11 of 29
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Confusticate and bebother these dwarves!"
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greendragon
Sr. Staff
Apr 1 2007, 3:36am
Post #12 of 29
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He learnt it from Prof McGonagall...
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But he was an unregistered animagus, and only occasionally did 'Grizzly' hang out with Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs...
'There are older and fouler things than orcs in the deep places of my fridge...'
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Idril Celebrindal
Dor-Lomin
Apr 1 2007, 3:47am
Post #13 of 29
(1271 views)
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With caffeine, all things are possible.
The pity of Bilbo will screw up the fate of many.
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Penthe
Mithlond
Apr 1 2007, 4:17am
Post #14 of 29
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I wish for sheep that make good servants, and to increase my tolerance of dwarves./
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Aerlinn
Menegroth
Apr 1 2007, 5:25am
Post #15 of 29
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He was bitten by Winnie the Pooh? /
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'I cannot read the furry letters,' said Frodo in a quavering voice.
'No,' said Gandalf, 'but I can.'
'One Ring to drool on them all, One Ring to heed them
One Ring to bring them all and remind them all to feed them
In the land of Kitchen where the litter lies.'
Daniel is travelling tonight on a plane
I can see the red tail-lights heading for Passaic.
Oh and I can see Daniel waving hello
God it looks like Daniel, must be the quid pro quo
697.08
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Aerlinn
Menegroth
Apr 1 2007, 5:54am
Post #16 of 29
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It was a grisly process, and a little barbearic.
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His Uncle Walter, a Yogi (who enjoyed waltzing), told him about it, and though Beorn didn't like to panda to the older generation he knew when to koala spade a spade. He had a hunch it might be a Bad Idea, but he headed to Paddington Station. There he met the Major, who had a minor cold. "Cub cub," he said, when Beorn expressed his doubts, "Id could be w-urse. Just bewere of what happened to Ben, that gentle fellow, who baloo his brains out... made the place rather smokey. I say, that bald man who just left wasn't the fuzz, was he?" The Major, though a great fan of Mr. Bean, turned out to be his polar opposite, but it was a Kodiak moment when they shared a hug when it was all over. Beorn drew the line at snuggles, though, and went home before he was declared a missing ursine.
'I cannot read the furry letters,' said Frodo in a quavering voice.
'No,' said Gandalf, 'but I can.'
'One Ring to drool on them all, One Ring to heed them
One Ring to bring them all and remind them all to feed them
In the land of Kitchen where the litter lies.'
Daniel is travelling tonight on a plane
I can see the red tail-lights heading for Passaic.
Oh and I can see Daniel waving hello
God it looks like Daniel, must be the quid pro quo
697.08
(This post was edited by Aerlinn on Apr 1 2007, 5:56am)
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Aerlinn
Menegroth
Apr 1 2007, 5:58am
Post #17 of 29
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He was actually a nudist, and misunderstood. /
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'I cannot read the furry letters,' said Frodo in a quavering voice.
'No,' said Gandalf, 'but I can.'
'One Ring to drool on them all, One Ring to heed them
One Ring to bring them all and remind them all to feed them
In the land of Kitchen where the litter lies.'
Daniel is travelling tonight on a plane
I can see the red tail-lights heading for Passaic.
Oh and I can see Daniel waving hello
God it looks like Daniel, must be the quid pro quo
697.08
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Ataahua
Forum Admin
/ Moderator
Apr 1 2007, 7:21am
Post #18 of 29
(1262 views)
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Celebrimbor: "Pretty rings..."
Dwarves: "Pretty rings..."
Men: "Pretty rings..."
Sauron: "Mine's better."
"Ah, how ironic, the addictive qualities of Sauron’s master weapon led to its own destruction. Which just goes to show, kids - if you want two small and noble souls to succeed on a mission of dire importance... send an evil-minded b*****d with them too." - Gandalf's Diaries, final par, by Ufthak.
Ataahua's stories
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hobbitlove
Mithlond
Apr 1 2007, 7:34am
Post #19 of 29
(1272 views)
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modding way, way, way up! Too good. Love it!
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Egleria! Iorhael!
hob
(former nick: "HobbitLoveR*M-e" among several others, briefly)
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L. Ron Halfelven
Hithlum
Apr 1 2007, 11:47am
Post #20 of 29
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He was at a science exhibition and got bitten by a radioactive bear./
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grammaboodawg
Elvenhome
Apr 1 2007, 3:24pm
Post #21 of 29
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He fell down the rabbit hole, and it all took off from there! //
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Trust him... The Hobbit is coming!
"Barney Snow was here." ~Hug like a hobbit!~ "In my heaven..."
TORn's Observations Lists
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GaladrielTX
Dor-Lomin
Apr 1 2007, 4:05pm
Post #23 of 29
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That's not a Care Bear, that's a WEREBEAR!
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I used to be GaladrielTX, but it's springtime and I'm shedding.
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Darkstone
Elvenhome
Apr 1 2007, 9:12pm
Post #25 of 29
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He was finally promoted from were-chihuahua. /
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I met a Balrog on the stair
He had some wings that weren't there.
They weren't there again today.
I wish he would just fly away.
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