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Magpie
Immortal
Mar 1 2014, 1:11am
Post #1 of 5
(236 views)
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I bet you anything...
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this post on the "Lord's Prayer" ring (which was moved to Gaming and Collecting) was made for humor reasons. First off, it's not the Lord's Prayer. Second, the post (on these board) links right to the reviews and the reviews are having a good laugh.
http://newboards.theonering.net/...i?post=719665#719665
This ring is perfect but I'm only giving it 4 stars because I turn invisible every time I use it. Does anyone have a solution to this problem?
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I ordered this as a gift .but chose to keep it after it came to me, this One Ring. Soon after I got it, the markings upon the band begin to fade. The writing, which at first was as clear as red flame, has all but disappeared--a secret now that only fire can tell.
Nevertheless, it is precious to me, though I buy it with great pain. I lay awake without sleep, hoping that reciting the prayer will give me peace. "Ash nazg durbatulūk, ash nazg gimbatul, ash nazg thrakatulūk, agh burzum-ishi krimpatul." Still the voices and the Great Eye are ever present, and yet I cannot let it go. I am bound to it, and it to me.
It is mine. My own. My Precious.
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I saw this and knew I had to have it for my very own it just looks so precious. But alas when I tried to order it they were out of stock. It seems they only ever made ONE RING like this one. Sure there are lesser rings out there but I am neither an Elf or Dwarf and I sure am not into being a Nazgul.
LOTR soundtrack website ~ magpie avatar gallery
TORn History Mathom-house ~ Torn Image Posting Guide
(This post was edited by Magpie on Mar 1 2014, 1:12am)
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Eruvandi
Tol Eressea
Mar 1 2014, 2:06am
Post #2 of 5
(156 views)
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The reviews are so funny! I love this one:
"Stupid King of Men cut this off my hand... then lost it in some stupid river, where the ring was found by some stinky little fellow...who freakin' lost it to some other little fellow. That fellow gave it to his nephew. Said nephew and his hippy friends and a girly elf set off to return it to me. But that stupid nephew threw it in the volcano. And this was after I spent time, money, orcs, wraiths and a balrog with wings trying to retrieve it and now my boss Morgoth is pretty mad. So if some one could reforge it and send it back that would be great, my job is riding on it. I'd reforge it myself but I am just some floating ethereal giant eyeball at this time. Thanks in advance."
Yeah, I'd say it's intended to be for humor only. It's a joke product, but then there are those real products on Amazon that are a joke, and not the intentional kind. Like this one:
http://www.amazon.com/...txt?showViewpoints=1
Yes, the Hutzler 571 Banana Slicer. Because slicing your banana with a knife, or the side of a fork, or even dental floss is soooo labor intensive. The reviews for it are really sarcastic but totally hysterical! This one's my favorite :
"For decades I have been trying to come up with an ideal way to slice a banana. "Use a knife!" they say. Well...my parole officer won't allow me to be around knives. "Shoot it with a gun!" Background check...HELLO! I had to resort to carefully attempt to slice those bananas with my bare hands. 99.9% of the time, I would get so frustrated that I just ended up squishing the fruit in my hands and throwing it against the wall in anger. Then, after a fit of banana-induced rage, my parole officer introduced me to this kitchen marvel and my life was changed. No longer consumed by seething anger and animosity towards thick-skinned yellow fruit, I was able to concentrate on my love of theatre and am writing a musical play about two lovers from rival gangs that just try to make it in the world. I think I'll call it South Side Story. Banana slicer...thanks to you, I see greatness on the horizon."
"And we find what we're made of
Through the open door
Is it fear you're afraid of?
What are you waiting for?
Love alone is worth the fight."
-Switchfoot
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Starling
Half-elven
Mar 1 2014, 4:47am
Post #3 of 5
(177 views)
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Short and sweet, from the customer who purchased it as a 'weight loss aid':
I'm giving it only three stars, because while it did help me lose weight, it left me feeling thin, and stretched, like butter spread over too much bread.
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Kirly
Lorien
Mar 2 2014, 6:14pm
Post #5 of 5
(142 views)
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Aw, I rather liked the idea. Oh well. ///
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My avatar photo is Lake Tekapo in New Zealand's South Island. Taken by me in 2004 on a Red Carpet Tours LOTR Movie Location Tour. 'Twas the Vacation of a Lifetime!
pictures taken while on the tour are here:
https://picasaweb.google.com/Kirly7/LOTRNewZealandTour#
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