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The One Ring Forums: Tolkien Topics: The Arena:
NFL player positions for the LOTR characters

Eruonen
Tol Eressea


Jan 23 2011, 5:51pm

Post #1 of 10 (1116 views)
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NFL player positions for the LOTR characters Can't Post

Ok, big playoff day today.

Team Allies vs Team Sauron

Galadriel...team owner
Gandalf...head coach
Theoden - offensive co-ordinator
Aragorn...QB
Boromir..tight end / middle linebacker
Faramir....cornerback
Eomer...and Riders or Rohan...offensive line
Gondorian soldiers...defensive line
Gimli..fullback / strong safety
Elrond and Legolas...wide receivers, Legolas punter and place kicker
Frodo....running back
Sam...tackle
Pippin....water boy
Merry....running back
Arwen, Eowyn and misc elven ladies....cheerleaders
Bilbo...team manager
Radagast....team meteorologist and medical officer

Grima...on waivers
Denethor...injured reserve
Saruman...traded to Sauron for a blue wizard to be named later.


Team Sauron

Sauron...owner,head coach.
Mouth of Sauron...team manager
Witch King...offensive co-ordinator, QB
Remaing Nazgul...offensive receivers and defensive secondary
Uruk Hai...offensive and defensive lines
Balrog....full back
Gollum...water boy
Moria orcs.....linebackers
Gorbag, Grishnakh and Snaga...running backs


Point spread by Las Vegas...Team Sauron +21 pts

Take the spread and bet on Team Allies
Game over and allies win if ring crosses end zone carried by Frodo

Go Bears!....Beorn after all.


(This post was edited by Eruonen on Jan 23 2011, 5:56pm)


Gimli'sBox
Gondor


Jan 23 2011, 7:35pm

Post #2 of 10 (303 views)
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Hehe... [In reply to] Can't Post

I don't know that much about football but, that looks brilliant!Laugh

Gollum will always be trying to be THE team owner. Feeding on fish all day!Tongue

Roast chicken?!

You're taller. Who? You. Then what? Then me! I've always been taller than you. Pippin, everyone knows you're the short one. I'm the tall one. Please Merry. Your what? Three foot six at the most. Whereas I'm pushing three seven. Three eight! Three foot eight! You did something.

It's Latin. Loosely translated, it means... we cheat.

"Strange treasures in this fair world appear, strange all, and new to me." That is a poem by Thomas Traherne and I have absolutely no idea what it's about. But, when I was small I was made to learn it by heart so I don't see why you shouldn't suffer too.

"Tell me, where is Santa for I much desire to speak with him."
-Darkstone


Wraith Buster
Gondor


Jan 23 2011, 8:08pm

Post #3 of 10 (301 views)
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I like Bilbo's position. Lol // [In reply to] Can't Post

 

------------------------------------------------------------------------
Bustin' makes me feel good!!

I do believe if our honorable friend continues to scrape the bottom of the barrel for objections he is in danger of getting splinters under his fingernails.

Have you heard nothing of the stubbornness of dwarves and their elf
instigators?

The dark spybot will not avail you, flame of Ubuntu!



Gimli'sBox
Gondor


Jan 23 2011, 8:28pm

Post #4 of 10 (384 views)
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Instead of the pig skin it's the Ringspell.// [In reply to] Can't Post

 

Roast chicken?!

You're taller. Who? You. Then what? Then me! I've always been taller than you. Pippin, everyone knows you're the short one. I'm the tall one. Please Merry. Your what? Three foot six at the most. Whereas I'm pushing three seven. Three eight! Three foot eight! You did something.

It's Latin. Loosely translated, it means... we cheat.

"Strange treasures in this fair world appear, strange all, and new to me." That is a poem by Thomas Traherne and I have absolutely no idea what it's about. But, when I was small I was made to learn it by heart so I don't see why you shouldn't suffer too.

"Tell me, where is Santa for I much desire to speak with him."
-Darkstone


AlassŽa Eruvande
Valinor


Jan 26 2011, 4:12pm

Post #5 of 10 (315 views)
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Frodo would be a terrible running back. [In reply to] Can't Post

He falls down too much!

Also, do you really think Eowyn is going to stand on the sidelines and cheer? She and Merry make a good team, why don't you swap her with Frodo? I'm imagining a trick play, where Eowyn laterals to Merry, after which she pulls off her helmet and says, "I am no man!" Merry takes it in for the win because Team Sauron never believed the reports that he was a high draft pick. Frodo makes it to the top of the Elvish-babe cheerleader pyramid, but inexplicably flops toward the ground. Arwen saves him again by catching him. Then they *pose*.

Winner: Allies



And suddenly the Tornadoes saw afar off a greenlight, as it were a cloud with a living heart of flame;
and they knew that this was no vision only, but that PJ had made a new thing: The Hobbit, the Film that Is.


Eldorion
Rohan


Jan 31 2011, 3:49pm

Post #6 of 10 (277 views)
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Frodo should be a field-goal kicker [In reply to] Can't Post

He's not terribly big or fast, but he can kick the crucial game-winning field goal just as time wins out and save the day for the entire team. Cool



There's a feeling I get, when I look to the West...



Eruonen
Tol Eressea


Jan 31 2011, 4:10pm

Post #7 of 10 (475 views)
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He certainly has the feet for it! [In reply to] Can't Post

He could also slip out of the backfield...put the ring on near the end zone...nobody would see him..but Nazgul secondary would sense it right away and head toward his area.....pass to his spot...catches it...game over!


(This post was edited by Eruonen on Jan 31 2011, 4:10pm)


Rodu
Rivendell

Feb 13 2011, 10:00pm

Post #8 of 10 (1245 views)
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Gimli at RB [In reply to] Can't Post

you need power to play RB, a Hobbit would get murdered there, especially with an undersized o-line


Tolkien Forever
Gondor

Mar 15 2011, 10:33pm

Post #9 of 10 (429 views)
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One Thing's For Sure [In reply to] Can't Post

Haldir won't be playing tight end.

The Ultimate Tolkien Trivia Quiz: http://www.proprofs.com/quiz-school/story.php?title=so-you-want-to-be-tolkien-geek


Squashed_into_Jelly
Bree


May 12 2011, 11:38pm

Post #10 of 10 (476 views)
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Balrog as fullback, Yikes [In reply to] Can't Post

There is no way the Allies Defense could stop him. He would drag the entire team into the end zone. Gandalf would have to step in as linebacker for them to have any chance.

O0o. Shocked Gandalf my old friend, this will be a film to remember. Wink

 
 

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