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MIddle-earth Conspiracy Theories

Ataahua
Superuser / Moderator


Jul 7 2017, 8:06pm

Post #1 of 23 (2933 views)
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MIddle-earth Conspiracy Theories Can't Post

It's been a few years since we got our suspicious minds together and ran the rumour-mill over the latest bit of scuttlebutt in Middle-earth, so let's dust this one off the shelf and see what funny, odd and downright scandalous answers we can come up with for this conspiracy theory!

So what was Sam *really* doing underneath that window?

(With thanks to Darkstone for the suggestion.)

Celebrimbor: "Pretty rings..."
Dwarves: "Pretty rings..."
Men: "Pretty rings..."
Sauron: "Mine's better."

"Ah, how ironic, the addictive qualities of Sauronís master weapon led to its own destruction. Which just goes to show, kids - if you want two small and noble souls to succeed on a mission of dire importance... send an evil-minded beggar with them too." - Gandalf's Diaries, final par, by Ufthak.


Ataahua's stories


Darkstone
Immortal


Jul 7 2017, 8:12pm

Post #2 of 23 (2819 views)
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Verging the trim. / [In reply to] Can't Post

 

******************************************

Elves and Men and Dwarves gonna cower,
When I finish building my tower,
When I finish building my tower with the Eye on top!
Watch that Eye and see how it glowers,
Ain't no contest between the Two Towers,
Nosy folks'll peek thru' palantirs and their eyes will pop!
The battlement's black and immeasurably strong, an adamant mountain of iron,
A buttress of steel, impossibly tall, held aloft by the power of Sauron!
See that Eye a winkin' and blinkin',
Ain't no finer tower I'm thinkin',
You can keep Orthanc if you're thinkin' that I'd care to swap,
For my black and shiny tower with the Eye on the top!

-Rodgers and Hammerstein, The Lord of the Rings


Otaku-sempai
Immortal


Jul 7 2017, 8:57pm

Post #3 of 23 (2814 views)
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'Watering' the shrubs. // [In reply to] Can't Post

 

"Who I am is where I stand. Where I stand is where I fall.Ē -- The Doctor


Meneldor
Valinor


Jul 7 2017, 10:51pm

Post #4 of 23 (2815 views)
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Desperately hoping that the silhouettes on the shade [In reply to] Can't Post

didn't belong to Rosie and Frodo.

They said to my shock
You're on the wrong block!



They that go down to the sea in ships, that do business in great waters, these see the works of the Lord, and His wonders in the deep. -Psalm 107

(This post was edited by Meneldor on Jul 7 2017, 10:52pm)


Ethel Duath
Half-elven


Jul 8 2017, 4:03am

Post #5 of 23 (2791 views)
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Looking for the spoon he dropped (trying to return . . .) // [In reply to] Can't Post

 



Lissuin
Tol Eressea


Jul 8 2017, 4:28am

Post #6 of 23 (2815 views)
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Getting his courage up for [In reply to] Can't Post

a serenade.




Ruxendil_Thoorg
Tol Eressea


Jul 8 2017, 3:06pm

Post #7 of 23 (2748 views)
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Was looking for his Eaves, he had not meant to drop, no sir.// [In reply to] Can't Post

 

***
"That doesn't make much sense to me. But then again, you are quite small. Perhaps you're right."


Ethel Duath
Half-elven


Jul 8 2017, 4:39pm

Post #8 of 23 (2741 views)
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:D [In reply to] Can't Post

Perfect!Laugh



squire
Half-elven


Jul 8 2017, 5:12pm

Post #9 of 23 (2739 views)
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Such serenades can have ... unpleasant consequences [In reply to] Can't Post

  "Tehee!" quod he, and clapte the wyndow to,
And Samwise gooth forth a sory pas.



squire online:
RR Discussions: The Valaquenta, A Shortcut to Mushrooms, and Of Herbs and Stewed Rabbit
Lights! Action! Discuss on the Movie board!: 'A Journey in the Dark'. and 'Designing The Two Towers'.
Archive: All the TORn Reading Room Book Discussions (including the 1st BotR Discussion!) and Footerama: "Tolkien would have LOVED it!"
Dr. Squire introduces the J.R.R. Tolkien Encyclopedia: A Reader's Diary


= Forum has no new posts. Forum needs no new posts.


Lissuin
Tol Eressea


Jul 8 2017, 9:10pm

Post #10 of 23 (2711 views)
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Tehee in dede. [In reply to] Can't Post

BlushLaugh


Greenwood Hobbit
Grey Havens


Jul 9 2017, 11:01am

Post #11 of 23 (2645 views)
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Guerilla gardening... [In reply to] Can't Post

 


grammaboodawg
Immortal


Jul 9 2017, 9:07pm

Post #12 of 23 (2577 views)
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Hunting for Middle-earth worms! // [In reply to] Can't Post

 



sample

We have been there and back again.


TIME Google Calendar


6th draft of TH:AUJ Geeky Observations List - November 28, 2013
4th draft of TH:DOS Geeky Observations List - May 15, 2014

5th draft of TH:BotFA Geeky Observations List - January 30, 2015


TORn's Geeky Observations Lists for LotR and The Hobbit


the 13th warrior
Rivendell


Jul 13 2017, 5:32am

Post #13 of 23 (2430 views)
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Smoking Longbottom Leaf and dropping Farmer Maggot's 'Shrooms.... [In reply to] Can't Post

 


L. Ron Halfelven
Grey Havens


Jul 13 2017, 1:07pm

Post #14 of 23 (2405 views)
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Digging for the gold and jools old Mr Bilbo picked up in foreign parts./ [In reply to] Can't Post

 

And Rose drew him in, and set him on the harpsichord bench, and put little Wilhelm Friedemann upon his lap.

He began composing a fugue. 'Well, I'm Bach,' he said.


grammaboodawg
Immortal


Jul 13 2017, 11:15pm

Post #15 of 23 (2359 views)
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Drilling through the wall to install a hose and spigot to the beer-barrel in the cellar // [In reply to] Can't Post

 



sample

We have been there and back again.


TIME Google Calendar


6th draft of TH:AUJ Geeky Observations List - November 28, 2013
4th draft of TH:DOS Geeky Observations List - May 15, 2014

5th draft of TH:BotFA Geeky Observations List - January 30, 2015


TORn's Geeky Observations Lists for LotR and The Hobbit


SirDennisC
Half-elven


Jul 21 2017, 6:26pm

Post #16 of 23 (1979 views)
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'Sneaking.' / [In reply to] Can't Post

 



grammaboodawg
Immortal


Jul 21 2017, 7:04pm

Post #17 of 23 (1968 views)
Shortcut
Conspiratoring // [In reply to] Can't Post

 


sample

We have been there and back again.


TIME Google Calendar


6th draft of TH:AUJ Geeky Observations List - November 28, 2013
4th draft of TH:DOS Geeky Observations List - May 15, 2014

5th draft of TH:BotFA Geeky Observations List - January 30, 2015


TORn's Geeky Observations Lists for LotR and The Hobbit


Lissuin
Tol Eressea


Jul 21 2017, 8:36pm

Post #18 of 23 (1968 views)
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Ha! [In reply to] Can't Post

It took one to know one, eh? Laugh


zarabia
Tol Eressea


Jul 22 2017, 3:40pm

Post #19 of 23 (1879 views)
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Burying spiders. He had heard that you could listen in on conversations if you planted bugs. [In reply to] Can't Post

 






Ataahua
Superuser / Moderator


Jul 22 2017, 9:08pm

Post #20 of 23 (1863 views)
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*slow clap* :D / [In reply to] Can't Post

 

Celebrimbor: "Pretty rings..."
Dwarves: "Pretty rings..."
Men: "Pretty rings..."
Sauron: "Mine's better."

"Ah, how ironic, the addictive qualities of Sauronís master weapon led to its own destruction. Which just goes to show, kids - if you want two small and noble souls to succeed on a mission of dire importance... send an evil-minded beggar with them too." - Gandalf's Diaries, final par, by Ufthak.


Ataahua's stories


dormouse
Half-elven


Jul 23 2017, 2:23pm

Post #21 of 23 (1808 views)
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Helping Mr Tolkien out with a plot from his bit of garden... // [In reply to] Can't Post

 

For still there are so many things
that I have never seen:
in every wood and every spring
there is a different green. . .


sador
Half-elven


Jul 24 2017, 6:32am

Post #22 of 23 (1759 views)
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So that's why LotR has a garden variety plot! // [In reply to] Can't Post

 


Roheryn
Grey Havens

Jul 30 2017, 10:31am

Post #23 of 23 (1626 views)
Shortcut
A hobbit named Sam overheard [In reply to] Can't Post

while trimming the bushes, these words:
"Go run to the ford!
Beware the Tar Klord!
For upon us, tthe end of the squirrelld!"

At which point, Sam realized it was time to get his hearing checked.

 
 

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