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The One Ring Forums: Tolkien Topics: Movie Discussion: The Hobbit:
The Hobbit Caption Contest LII (Lies?)

StingingFly
Lorien


May 6 2017, 11:54pm

Post #1 of 14 (3895 views)
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The Hobbit Caption Contest LII (Lies?) Can't Post

I extend my gratitude to the estimable Darkstone...and offer this Caption....

With those numerals, let's go with our favorite liar...Alfrid Lickspittle!




Otaku-sempai
Immortal


May 7 2017, 12:18am

Post #2 of 14 (3820 views)
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Bard the Bowman is a trouble-maker! Bard is a bully! Bard is... [In reply to] Can't Post

...right behind me, isn't he?

"He who lies artistically, treads closer to the truth than ever he knows." -- Favorite proverb of the wizard Ningauble of the Seven Eyes


dormouse
Half-elven


May 7 2017, 10:11am

Post #3 of 14 (3788 views)
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"And I tell you now..... [In reply to] Can't Post

..that the state of dentistry in Laketown is a disgrace. Something must be done!"

For still there are so many things
that I have never seen:
in every wood and every spring
there is a different green. . .


Belegdir
Lorien


May 7 2017, 11:57am

Post #4 of 14 (3776 views)
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It's my ball and I'm taking it with me! *sniff* [In reply to] Can't Post

 


Smaug the iron
Gondor


May 7 2017, 1:43pm

Post #5 of 14 (3769 views)
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Okay, who's dog did this? [In reply to] Can't Post

 


Darkstone
Immortal


May 8 2017, 1:45pm

Post #6 of 14 (3670 views)
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"So if your name is 'Bard' then why is Alfrid doing all the singing?" / [In reply to] Can't Post

 

******************************************

Once Radagast dreamt he was a moth, a moth flitting and fluttering around, happy with himself and doing as he pleased. He didn't know he was Radagast. Suddenly he woke up and there he was, solid and unmistakably Radagast. But he didn't know if he was Radagast who had dreamt he was a moth, or a moth dreaming he was Radagast. Between Radagast and a moth there must be some distinction! But really, there isn't, because he's actually Aiwendil dreaming he's both Radagast *and* a moth!
-From Radagasti: The Moth Dream


(This post was edited by Darkstone on May 8 2017, 1:58pm)


Fereth
Rivendell


May 8 2017, 4:15pm

Post #7 of 14 (3676 views)
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. [In reply to] Can't Post

Alfrid: And I think it is absolutely outrageous that Peter Jackson would add Tauriel to the films when she wasn't a character in the book!

Bard: ...

Alfrid: This sullying of Tolkien's treasured works-

Bard: Alfrid...

Alfrid: -the destruction of canon-

Bard: Alfrid-

Alfrid: -all in the name of political correctness, cannot be tolerated-!

Bard: Alfrid!

Alfrid: What?

Bard: You're not in the book, either.

Alfrid: ... so anyway, a little creative license never hurt anyone, and after all the films really are just an adaptation...


Darkstone
Immortal


May 8 2017, 5:13pm

Post #8 of 14 (3650 views)
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Oh, I like this! / [In reply to] Can't Post

 

******************************************

Once Radagast dreamt he was a moth, a moth flitting and fluttering around, happy with himself and doing as he pleased. He didn't know he was Radagast. Suddenly he woke up and there he was, solid and unmistakably Radagast. But he didn't know if he was Radagast who had dreamt he was a moth, or a moth dreaming he was Radagast. Between Radagast and a moth there must be some distinction! But really, there isn't, because he's actually Aiwendil dreaming he's both Radagast *and* a moth!
-From Radagasti: The Moth Dream


Lissuin
Tol Eressea


May 8 2017, 7:56pm

Post #9 of 14 (3636 views)
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Excellent! I can hear each of them. / [In reply to] Can't Post

 


dormouse
Half-elven


May 9 2017, 7:40am

Post #10 of 14 (3572 views)
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Nice! // [In reply to] Can't Post

 

For still there are so many things
that I have never seen:
in every wood and every spring
there is a different green. . .


Kilidoescartwheels
Valinor


May 11 2017, 2:21pm

Post #11 of 14 (3390 views)
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Bard and the Laketown survivors seriously doubt Alfrid can really catch an egg in his mouth! [In reply to] Can't Post

Bombur, maybe, but Alfrid? Nah.Crazy


I'd say I've entered my second childhood, but I never left the first!


L. Ron Halfelven
Grey Havens


May 11 2017, 4:27pm

Post #12 of 14 (3378 views)
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Now that Bard's archery is vindicated, Alfrid is reduced to belittling his manhood./ [In reply to] Can't Post



StingingFly
Lorien


May 15 2017, 2:03am

Post #13 of 14 (3051 views)
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...the Winner! [In reply to] Can't Post

...though I agree with Alfrid's original point, I have to admit, that was a very clever bit of satire. Lead on!
...I award the silver medal to L.Ron Halfelven, for a post that I should not have viewed while eating lunch as I almost choked from laughing.


Fereth
Rivendell


May 16 2017, 9:34pm

Post #14 of 14 (2931 views)
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Haha thank you! :) [In reply to] Can't Post

I will get a new pic up shortly.

 
 

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