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TiliMithrilfist
Registered User
Feb 4 2016, 5:53pm
Post #1 of 10
(1211 views)
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A Major Modern Tolkien Fan
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This is my parody of Gilbert and Sullivan’s “Modern Major-General” song. This song is titles “Major Modern Tolkien Fan
I am the very model of a major modern Tolkien fan,
I've read the Hobbit, LOTR, and the Silmarillion,
I know the kings of Gondor, and I quote the fights historical,
From The War of Wrath to Pellenor, in order categorical;
I’ve heard that Tom Bombadill could be metaphorical,
I also do believe that Frodo and Gandalf are allegorical,
I often check TORN which is usually teaming with a lot of news---
And it also has a chatroom where user discuss their various views.
It also has a chatroom where users discuss their various views
It also has a chatroom where users discuss their various views
It also has a chatroom where users discuss their variarious views!
Tolkien’s entire elvish language is quite fabulous;
I know the elvish names of beings animalculous;
In short, I’ve read The Hobbit, LOTR, and the Silmarillion,
I am the very model of a major modern Tolkien fan.
In short, he’s read The Hobbit, LOTR, and the Silmarillion,
He is the very model of a major modern Tolkien fan!
I know Middle-Earth history, King Elessar’s and the Brandybuck’s,
I ace Middle-Earth quizzes, Ask me a question I will not be stuck,
I quote in elegiacs all the antics of Mariodoc,
Such as drinking Ent tonics as Bullroarer he did start to mock.
I can tell you the names of the Valar from Manwe to Este,
I also the powers of each such as Yavanna who made the trees,
I know what they each sang about in Illuvatar’s song afore,
And I know every detail of the creation of Valinor.
And he knows every detail of the creation of Valinor.
And he knows every detail of the creation of Valinor.
And he knows every detail of the creation of Valinininor!
Then I can write a beautiful poem in Khuzdul, in dwarvish runes,
And tell you every detail of Moria, where dwarves met their doom;
In short, I’ve read The Hobbit, LOTR, and the Silmarillion,
I am the very model of a major modern Tolkien fan.
In short, he’s read The Hobbit, LOTR, and the Silmarillion,
He is the very model of a major modern Tolkien fan!
In fact, when I know what is meant by "Tinuviel" and "Luthien",
When I’ve read the Unfinished Tales over again and again,
When I know every single fact that’s found in the Lost Tales,
And when I know the Histories of Middle Earth so well,
When I have read through every book somehow related to Tolkien,
When my knowledge of his entire world is so rich that it’s golden:
In short, when I have criticized PJ’s six movies,
You'll say a bigger Tolkien fan has never studied so strongly
You'll say a bigger Tolkien fan has never studied so strongly
You'll say a bigger Tolkien fan has never studied so strongly
You'll say a bigger Tolkien fan has never studied so strongongoly
For my Middle-Earth knowledge, though in reading I often engage,
Has only been brought down to the beginning of the fifth age;
Because, I’ve read The Hobbit, LOTR, and the Silmarillion,
I am the very model of a major modern Tolkien fan.
Because, he’s read The Hobbit, LOTR, and the Silmarillion,
He is the very model of a major modern Tolkien fan.
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Otaku-sempai
Immortal
Feb 4 2016, 7:04pm
Post #2 of 10
(1182 views)
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I'm exhausted just reading that!
"Things need not to have happened to be true.
Tales and dreams are the shadow-truths that will endure
when mere facts are dust and ashes, and forgot."
- Dream of the Endless
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Ataahua
Forum Admin
/ Moderator
Feb 4 2016, 9:16pm
Post #4 of 10
(1170 views)
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Not only was that fantastic but I learnt a new word! 
Welcome to TORN, TiliMithrilfist.
Celebrimbor: "Pretty rings..."
Dwarves: "Pretty rings..."
Men: "Pretty rings..."
Sauron: "Mine's better."
"Ah, how ironic, the addictive qualities of Sauron’s master weapon led to its own destruction. Which just goes to show, kids - if you want two small and noble souls to succeed on a mission of dire importance... send an evil-minded beggar with them too." - Gandalf's Diaries, final par, by Ufthak.
Ataahua's stories
(This post was edited by Ataahua on Feb 4 2016, 9:23pm)
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Nieriel
Rivendell
Feb 4 2016, 10:05pm
Post #5 of 10
(1152 views)
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So clever!
"Our loves are not given, but only lent." Rudyard Kipling
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Greenwood Hobbit
Valinor
Feb 4 2016, 10:33pm
Post #6 of 10
(1149 views)
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Now THAT would be a real challenge to sing!
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Brilliant! Must have taken ages to write.
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Meneldor
Valinor
Feb 5 2016, 3:09am
Post #8 of 10
(1123 views)
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How about Elrond's version of "I am an Elvish Man."
They that go down to the sea in ships, that do business in great waters, these see the works of the Lord, and His wonders in the deep. -Psalm 107
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Belegdir
Lorien
Feb 5 2016, 1:16pm
Post #9 of 10
(1097 views)
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I'd like to hear set to the music. :)
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imin
Valinor
Feb 5 2016, 10:54pm
Post #10 of 10
(1073 views)
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Great job and welcome to TORn. :)
All posts are to be taken as my opinion.
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Bravo!//
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