|
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Kilidoescartwheels
Valinor
Jan 15 2016, 3:43am
Post #1 of 15
(1248 views)
Shortcut
|
|
Tauriel's Story Chapter 3 - the Sea of Rhun
|
Can't Post
|
|
Sorry this took so long - I'm going to try and do a chapter a week until this is finished. The first two chapters are also posted on this Fan Art page, and my blog: hobbitized.wordpress.com. Hope you like it!
The Sea of Rhun
Tauriel watched in disgust as a crewman leaned over the rail and wretched. She wondered how someone who professed to loving the sea could be so sickened by it. The deck pitched and rolled beneath her feet, however she felt neither dizzy nor queasy from this experience.
“I’d say you were made for life at sea,” Kristoff remarked. “If you were a man I’d hire you.”
“Then it’s a good thing I’m not a man.” She scanned the horizon for any sign of land.
“You’ll not see land for another day or two.” Kristoff worked his way to the bow, where a sundial helped him stay on course. He normally went by the stars, but the previous night’s skies were cloudy. Just as he arrived the bow dipped, and his face was drenched by cold, salty spray. He swore reflexively. “Pardon, milady. Perhaps you’d be better off below deck?”
“I am fine, thank you.” In truth, she didn’t like being below deck. The hold was dark and stank from the unwashed bodies of his crew. Those not on duty slept in the hold; Tauriel had only a curtain to separate her from the crew.
“Suit yourself.” Kristoff pulled a cloth from his pocket and attempted to dry his face. “One good thing about this storm – we shouldn’t see any Corsairs. Those pirates wouldn’t be crazy enough to go out in this weather.”
“Corsairs?” Tauriel had not heard of them.
“Aye. They do on the sea what the Variags do on land. Their black ships are plenty fast, but I’ve outrun them a few times.”
“But you don’t think they’ll be out now?”
Kristoff shook his head. “They’ll be harbored in the southeast part of the sea.” He studied the sundial; only the faintest shadow appeared, but it was enough. “Don’t you worry, we’re traveling far north of their harbor.”
Tauriel stood next to the Captain, and looked down at the sundial. “You are certain? There’s barely a shadow on this disc.”
Kristoff chuckled. “M’dear, I could sail my course blindfolded – in fact, I have a few times when it was pitch black at night. Excuse me.” He stepped quickly to the stern and adjusted the sailing oar.
Tauriel followed him. “Are these Corsairs allied with the Variags?”
“Ha!” Kristoff held the oar firmly as the ship bobbed in the rough waves. “Corsairs are only interested in loot – especially gold. They care for no one, not even each other. But the Variags!” He shuddered as he spoke. “They still follow Morgoth, and await his return. And they spurn anyone who doesn’t follow their religion – good thing, that. I believe it would take the return of Morgoth, or one of his servants to unite those two clans, and Lord help us if that ever happens!” He noticed a strange look on Tauriel’s face. “Why do you ask?”
Her mission was supposed to be secret, yet Tauriel wondered if she shouldn’t warn Kristoff of the danger. He at least appeared to not know of Sauron’s return to Mordor. “I suppose I – just want to know more of the people in this land. Are there no safe villages?”
He shrugged. “I guess that depends on what you mean by safe. The port village of Phimes is pretty safe – at least it’s well fortified. The Corsairs haven’t attacked in years. But between Phimes and the Orocarni mountains you’ll not find many villages, and what you do find will be Variag.”
Tauriel nodded. “How far are the mountains?”
“Pretty far.” He called one of the deck hands to take the oar. “Follow me.” They went down a ladder into the ship’s hold. A single candle burned in a wall sconce. He fished another from his pocket, lighting it with the flame. He then reached into a cubby hole and pulled out a map etched in wood. “Here’s Phimes, and here,” he tapped a spot on the wood near the mountains, “is the town of Krasnagora. The men who live there are pretty hardy folk, and there’s a couple of Dwarven clans there as well. Ye’d be quite safe there, if you can get there in one piece.”
Tauriel examined the map. “And what of this forest?”
“Oh, you don’t want to go there.” Kristoff shook his head. “That’s the Dark Forest. Rumor has it the Dark Elves live there, though to be honest I doubt there are any left that haven’t been turned to Orcs. At least I’ve never seen one.”
“Orcs?” Tauriel turned sharply toward him. “There are Orcs in the forest?”
“Something lives there, but I don’t know what. You’d have to be mad to step foot in there – I’d rather take my chances with the Variags. Here,” he added as he handed her the map. “You may look at this for awhile, but I will need it back. Now, I must get back to the deck, excuse me.” He walked over to the ladder, snuffing and pocketing his candle before climbing up the deck.
Tauriel didn’t need the extra light – the single flame was more than enough. Best she could tell, the ship was sailing south of the Dark Forest, but not too far south. The wide plains of Rhun stretched east to the Orocarni and south to Mordor. The area covered hundreds of leagues and would take months to travel. It had taken nearly three months of her year-long banishment just to get this far. The journey through Rhun she was tasked with could take a full year on its own!
Worse still, other than Phimes and Krasnagora, there were no other villages marked on Kristoff’s map. How was it that the people here could know so little about their own land? Perhaps it was only Kristoff who knew so little; perhaps there were people in Phimes that knew more. One of the sleeping men rolled over, passing gas in his sleep. Tauriel grimaced as she shoved the map into the cubby hole, then quickly returned above deck.
The seas calmed after a few hours, and Kristoff informed her that the rest of their journey would be more pleasant. That night, Tauriel had a small amount of bread and wine while gazing at the stars. (Elves need food and sleep like mortal men, but the need is much less.) The sea breeze was cold, but the air smelled clean. The stars twinkled above as if whispering to her, assuring her she was on the right course. She stayed above deck all night, enjoying the comfort and familiarity of the starlight. The next day, the rising sun revealed a coastline against the dark horizon. Kristoff couldn’t see it yet, but he promised Tauriel that land would be visible before long. “I have no doubt of it,” she replied kindly.
A short time later land could be seen by all, and it put the crew in good spirits. They had survived another trip across the sea in winter, neither attacked by Corsairs nor sunk by the storm. They had been well paid by their lone passenger, and could barter for another shipment of winter wheat for Dorwinion.
Tauriel could make out the high walls that shielded the City from any pirates. The walls rested on pylons sunk into the water some 30 feet from the shore. A wide wrought-iron gate was suspended above, allowing ships such as the Antilles to come inside. The gate could be dropped at the first sign of trouble.
The ship’s sail strained from the strong breeze, speeding them closer to port. Tauriel could see streets on the other side of the gate. The city appeared to be larger than Dorwinion. “Kristoff,” she called out, “how big is the City?”
“Oh, it’s very big,” he replied, “definitely the largest port city on this side of the sea – well, the only one really. If you want to do trade, you’ll do it here.” Tauriel noticed other small vessels coming up from the South. Some were powered by men at the oars; others had colorful sails like the Antilles. It almost looked like they were racing each other. Tauriel was surprised to hear herself laughing! It was the first time she’d laughed in so long – the first time since Kili’s death. Her laughter died quickly, replaced with sorrow. “Something wrong?” Kristoff looked concerned.
“It’s nothing,” she stammered, “it’s just … I wish a friend of mine could see this.”
“A friend?” He didn’t sound too convinced. “Apologies, miss, it’s not my business.” He walked toward the sailing oar, shouting commands to his crew, but Tauriel didn’t hear them. Her mind went back to that dreadful day when she failed to save Kili from Bolg. She had been badly injured by the Gundabad Orc, but the pain in her heart was so much worse. Only then was she able to admit her feelings for the Dwarf – when it was too late.
The ship turned sharply, pulling her back to the present as the crew prepared to pass through the gate. She braced herself, knowing that the next part of her journey would be even more dangerous than the sea.
Proud member of the BOFA Denial Association
|
|
|
Otaku-sempai
Immortal
Jan 15 2016, 4:24am
Post #2 of 15
(1232 views)
Shortcut
|
A sundial is useless on a ship or boat. It has to be stationary.
I'm not sure that the Wood-elves of Mirkwood wouldn't get along with the Avari. Tolkien wrote that they were actually quite a bit alike and that in some ways the Teleri were more like the Dark Elves than like the other Elves of the Great Journey. The SIndar were an exception to this.
That night, Tauriel had a small amount of bread and wine while gazing at the stars. (Elves need food and sleep like mortal men, but the need is much less.)
Technical Note: The parenthetical portion of this passage should not be separated from the previous sentence:
That night, Tauriel had a small amount of bread and wine while gazing at the stars (Elves need food and sleep like mortal men, but the need is much less).
I'm not sure that Elves would have needed much less food then Mortal Men, but they might have been able to go longer without eating. They seldom would have needed to sleep as Men do; most of the time they would have entered a meditative state to refresh them and only needed true sleep if they were exhausted or injured. They might have even been able to carry out routine activities (walking, riding) while in meditation. Elves were supposed to be immune from natural illness.
I don't think that there should normally be Variags living between the Sea of Rhûn and the Orocarni, but it's your story. Maybe you have a good reason for it.
"Things need not to have happened to be true.
Tales and dreams are the shadow-truths that will endure
when mere facts are dust and ashes, and forgot."
- Dream of the Endless
(This post was edited by Otaku-sempai on Jan 15 2016, 4:30am)
|
|
|
Sarahbor
Lorien
Jan 15 2016, 5:08am
Post #3 of 15
(1226 views)
Shortcut
|
Agree with OS about the sundial - doesn't work on a ship. They would use a sextant or an astrolabe instead.
The expression "May the Lord help us" doesn't make sense in Middle-earth; change it to "May Eru help us" (b/c "Lord" refers to Christ, and Eru (God) has not yet come in to Middle-earth as discussed in the debate of Finrod and Andreth)
The language nerd in me is going to point out that Krasnagora is Russian for "Red Mountains" - which is the same translation as Orocarni. I see what you did there 
Hobbit/LOTR cartoons & humor: http://www.sarahbor.com/
|
|
|
ThorinsNemesis
Lorien
Jan 15 2016, 6:45am
Post #4 of 15
(1216 views)
Shortcut
|
|
The story is getting even more interesting!
[In reply to]
|
Can't Post
|
|
I like Kristoff's story on the Dark Forest, it's the forest on the Eastern slopes of the Orocarni Mountains, right?
I can't wait to see the next chapter .
|
|
|
Otaku-sempai
Immortal
Jan 15 2016, 3:43pm
Post #5 of 15
(1208 views)
Shortcut
|
|
Gods and Religions in Middle-earth
[In reply to]
|
Can't Post
|
|
The expression "May the Lord help us" doesn't make sense in Middle-earth; change it to "May Eru help us" (b/c "Lord" refers to Christ, and Eru (God) has not yet come in to Middle-earth as discussed in the debate of Finrod and Andreth)
I agree that the use of 'the Lord' is questionable. I do think that by this time, though, peoples such as the Easterlings and Southrons would have developed their own gods and religions, some based on vague memories and legends about the Valar and Maiar, some Melkor-cults, and some wholly original.
Note to Kilidoescartwheels: The name 'Phimes' should be capitalized, but not the word 'city'.
"Things need not to have happened to be true.
Tales and dreams are the shadow-truths that will endure
when mere facts are dust and ashes, and forgot."
- Dream of the Endless
(This post was edited by Otaku-sempai on Jan 15 2016, 3:48pm)
|
|
|
Kilidoescartwheels
Valinor
Jan 15 2016, 9:29pm
Post #6 of 15
(1196 views)
Shortcut
|
Agree with OS about the sundial - doesn't work on a ship. They would use a sextant or an astrolabe instead. The expression "May the Lord help us" doesn't make sense in Middle-earth; change it to "May Eru help us" (b/c "Lord" refers to Christ, and Eru (God) has not yet come in to Middle-earth as discussed in the debate of Finrod and Andreth) The language nerd in me is going to point out that Krasnagora is Russian for "Red Mountains" - which is the same translation as Orocarni. I see what you did there
I'm looking at Eastern Europe & even a bit of central Asia (mostly Turkey) for names. About the Sundial - I got this Viking book that said they used a sun shadow box to aid in direction in daytime (mostly navigating by latitude) and stars at night. I wasn't sure if anyone would know what that was, so I called it a sundial. Maybe I should have stuck with sun shadow, haha! Like I said earlier, I've not read the Silmarilion, but I picked up a book called "Tolkien, an Illustrated Atlas" to hopefully help me out a little with this. My first instinct is to say "God help us," but obviously that wouldn't work. But of course Kristoff is from Phimes, and who knows who they worship, if anyone.
Proud member of the BOFA Denial Association
|
|
|
Kilidoescartwheels
Valinor
Jan 15 2016, 9:34pm
Post #7 of 15
(1195 views)
Shortcut
|
|
It's just north of the Sea of Rhun
[In reply to]
|
Can't Post
|
|
Here is the map that I'm using.
I know it's kind of small, sorry about that! Anyway, this shows a forest right off the northern shore, and at least according to the Atlas I bought, it may be the where the Avari's city of Cuiven is located. I need to hit up some Tolkienologists for help on that - maybe OS, if he's listening?
I know
Proud member of the BOFA Denial Association
|
|
|
Kilidoescartwheels
Valinor
Jan 15 2016, 9:46pm
Post #8 of 15
(1192 views)
Shortcut
|
|
This is the problem with fanfiction
[In reply to]
|
Can't Post
|
|
I already feel like I should go back and revise the first two chapters, to make the time line a bit longer. And now there's this apparent boo boo with a sundial/sun shadow device. As far as the Dark Elves, well that will be explained better in the next 2 chapters. The plan is that their initial meeting will be rough, but then they'll get along with Tauriel just fine - well, most of them anyway, hehe.
I got the idea from Legolas that Elves don't need much sleep or food - Lamnas bread? One small bite will fill the stomach, etc. Maybe it's just Elven bread that does that. But according to the report I'm using, "East Middle Earth: A Story Worth Telling?" by Gretnablue, the Variags roamed the plains between the Sea and the Mountains, while the Easterlings were south of those plains. I was a little more concerned about the Corsairs - I have no idea where they are from, I guess I was channeling PJ & making a reference to RoTK. I don't know if I can find a link to that report, it's on some other Tolkien website, can't remember which one.
Proud member of the BOFA Denial Association
|
|
|
Otaku-sempai
Immortal
Jan 15 2016, 10:02pm
Post #9 of 15
(1190 views)
Shortcut
|
Anyway, this shows a forest right off the northern shore, and at least according to the Atlas I bought, it may be the where the Avari's city of Cuiven is located. I need to hit up some Tolkienologists for help on that - maybe OS, if he's listening?
Sorry, never heard of it. Where did you get it from?
Cuiviénen was a bay on the shore of the inland Sea of Helcar, lying at the foot of the Orocarni near the Wild Wood. It was where the Elves first awoke. The Sea of Rhûn and the Sea of Nurnen in Mordor were probably the last surviving remnants of the Helcar.
Going by Karen Fonstad's maps, the Bay of Cuiviénen might have been located more-or-less straight east from the southern end of the Sea of Rhûn, north of the remaining forest on the southwest end of the Orocarni. However, it might be impossible to pinpoint unless the Avari know the location.
Lembas has magical properties and will feed anyone, Man, Elf, Dwarf or Hobbit quite well.
There could certainly be pirates on the inland Sea of Rhûn. However, when Corsairs are mentioned in Middle-earth, one usually thinks of the Corsairs of Umbar where northwestern Middle-earth borders Near Harad on the shores of the Great Sea.
"Things need not to have happened to be true.
Tales and dreams are the shadow-truths that will endure
when mere facts are dust and ashes, and forgot."
- Dream of the Endless
(This post was edited by Otaku-sempai on Jan 15 2016, 10:09pm)
|
|
|
Sarahbor
Lorien
Jan 15 2016, 10:19pm
Post #10 of 15
(1182 views)
Shortcut
|
Yes, it's only a feature of lembas bread that keeps you full in just small bites, not of elves needing less food in general.
The Corsairs are from Umbar, a port south of Gondor. They were invading Gondor in ROTK but they come from further south. The only rivers that connect to the Sea of Rhun are the River Running and the Redwater, coming from the Long Lake and the Iron Hills respectively, so they couldn't get to the sea by a direct water route from Umbar.
Didn't know about the sun shadow device - sounds cool!
Hobbit/LOTR cartoons & humor: http://www.sarahbor.com/
(This post was edited by Sarahbor on Jan 15 2016, 10:21pm)
|
|
|
Nieriel
Rivendell
Jan 15 2016, 10:20pm
Post #11 of 15
(1183 views)
Shortcut
|
am enjoying your story, and of course there will be technical details that need ironing out, that happens with all writers, but that's just a side issue and will involve a bit of research, don't let that drag you down too much as that is something that can be fixed - the most important thing I feel you should know is that your story has good bone structure and that you know how to tell a tale. I am looking forward to more 
|
|
|
Otaku-sempai
Immortal
Jan 16 2016, 1:05am
Post #13 of 15
(1172 views)
Shortcut
|
Are you assuming that Tauriel knows enough Sylvan to get by? It is unlikely that there would be many (if any) East-elves who know Sindarin (the language of Thranduil's Court) or Quenya. And any Sylvan that Tauriel knows was probably learned when her parents were still alive. There's also the question of if the Sylvan still spoken in the East has changed significantly from the time of the Great Journey, many thousands of years earlier.
Tauriel's Westron should also become a problem the farther East or South she travels. No only is she going to need an interpreter eventually, but Westron is going to call unwanted attention to her. She will stand out as an outsider even when she is not seen as an Elf, and some will start to wonder if she is a spy.
"Things need not to have happened to be true.
Tales and dreams are the shadow-truths that will endure
when mere facts are dust and ashes, and forgot."
- Dream of the Endless
(This post was edited by Otaku-sempai on Jan 16 2016, 1:06am)
|
|
|
Kilidoescartwheels
Valinor
Jan 16 2016, 5:20am
Post #14 of 15
(1158 views)
Shortcut
|
She's pretty much done with traveling alone - in Chapter 4 she meets some other people - but it's certainly something to think about. While on this subject, do the Ironfist and Stiffbeard dwarves speak Kuzdul? I realize Tauriel probably doesn't speak Kuzdul, but others would. They are not too far from the Iron Hills, so I have been assuming that all the Dwarves speak the same language.
It also makes sense that the Variags would speak a different language, but she will be with others that could translate. I'm assuming the people of Phimes, who do business with Dorwinian, would at least be able to speak Westron - sort of like how many Europeans can speak English as a second language. But the next village, well, hmmm - could be interesting!
Proud member of the BOFA Denial Association
|
|
|
Otaku-sempai
Immortal
Jan 16 2016, 1:56pm
Post #15 of 15
(1148 views)
Shortcut
|
Professor Tolkien indicated that all Dwarves spoke Khuzdul, which was invented by the Vala Aulë (Mahal to the Dwarves) and taught to them by him at the time of their awakening.
Dwarves almost never taught their language to outsiders, even keeping their true Khuzdul names secret. The names that they used in public were taken from local Mannish languages. The only Khuzdul that Tauriel would be likely to know would be the phrase that translates as "I love you."
There should originally have been four Houses of the Dwarves located in the Orocarni: The Ironfists and Stiffbeards in the North; and the Blacklocks and Stonefoots in the southern part of the range. It is hard to say whether they would all still be present in the mountains by the end of the Third Age or whether one or more of the clans would have moved elsewhere. However, as far as I can tell, none of the Dwarves migrated to either Near or Far Harad or to any of the ranges that form the borders of Mordor. I imagine, though, that any groups of Dwarves who allied themselves with Sauron might have founded one or more colonies near Mordor or even in the mountains to the south of Umbar. I have never seen this discussed.
"Things need not to have happened to be true.
Tales and dreams are the shadow-truths that will endure
when mere facts are dust and ashes, and forgot."
- Dream of the Endless
|
|
|
|
|
