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Sebastian the Hedgehog
Rivendell
Apr 1 2015, 9:18pm
Post #1 of 12
(1283 views)
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How would you humorously rename Tolkien's books?
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If you had to make a new title for any of Tolkien's books that were completely honest about the story, what would you choose? I'm hoping this can be a little creative and humourous game For example, I would rename The Hobbit: "The Hobbit or There and Back Again or How the Chiefest and Greatest Calamity of the Third Age Got Roused From a Nap, Harassed by Some Midgets, and Shanked by a Fisherman".
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BlackFox
Half-elven
Apr 1 2015, 9:36pm
Post #2 of 12
(1249 views)
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How about The Hobbit Or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love My Tookish Side?
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Faleel
Rohan
Apr 2 2015, 6:02pm
Post #3 of 12
(1222 views)
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The Lord of the Rings or The Long Walk to Freedom. The Silmarillion or Nyquil In Book Form. The Hobbit or Bilbo Baggins and the 13 Dwarves
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Bracegirdle
Valinor
Apr 3 2015, 7:15pm
Post #4 of 12
(1178 views)
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The Lord of the Seventeen Rings
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and How He Snookered a Gaggle of Elves ______________________________________ A Hobbit Goes on a Journey and Comes Back Dead but Rich __________________________________ Sal Marillion Compiles the History of the Universe and Other Trivialities
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Darkstone
Immortal
Apr 3 2015, 7:55pm
Post #5 of 12
(1205 views)
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This is Poetry, Dammit! (Beowulf and the Critics) Portrait of the Artist as a Middle-Aged Baggins (The Hobbit) Gollum Takes a Trip (The Lord of the Rings) Stuff to Make Your Eyes Glaze Over (The Silmarillion) You Really Don't Have Much of a Life, Do You? - Volumes 1-10 (HoME) He Dies, She Dies, Everybody Dies (The Children of Hurin) Yes, Christopher, There Really is a Santa Claus (The Father Christmas Letters) How to Train Your Dragon (Farmer Giles of Ham) Dog Gone Tales (Roverandom) If I Can Swallow It, I Can Pass It (Smith of Wootton Major) I Catastrophe, We Catastrophe, Eucatastrophe (On Fairy Stories) I Don’t Think I’ll Ever Finish The Silmarillion (Leaf By Niggle) I Hate You All (The Adventures of Tom Bombadil) Look What We Found in an Old Box in the Attic (The Fall of Arthur) You'd Buy Anything With Tolkien's Name on the Cover, Wouldn't You? (The Legend of Sigurd and Gudrún)
****************************************** No Orc, No Orc!! It's a wonderful town!!! Mount Doom blew up, And the Black Tower's down!! The orcs all fell in a hole in the ground! No Orc, No Orc!! It's a heckuva town!!! -Lord of the Rings: The Musical, music by Leonard Bernstein, lyrics by Betty Comden and Adolph Green
(This post was edited by Darkstone on Apr 3 2015, 8:06pm)
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Brethil
Half-elven
Apr 3 2015, 8:38pm
Post #6 of 12
(1170 views)
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Modar, this needs a *Warning: Risk of Public Snorting* tag
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Because after reading this the folks in the barber shop tossed me a few looks. Fantastic. Comprehensive.
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Bracegirdle
Valinor
Apr 3 2015, 9:30pm
Post #8 of 12
(1164 views)
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And BlackFox lost her swords! Must be those missing thumbs. Confusticate it!
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Bombadil
Half-elven
Apr 4 2015, 12:09am
Post #9 of 12
(1152 views)
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" A really LOONG Set of 6 Books.. that has sooom REally, Really Loooong Sentences, endless paragraphs describing the roots of TREES & the moss growing on them? That COULD have @ least used a "BIT of Bothersome" Editing every now & AGAIN?" Subtitled "A Travelogue from Absolute Happiness to Ghastly DEATH from the Most God-Awful Creatures from your WORST Nightmares.. EDited by TreeBEARD.. The Hobbit a SHORT tale, that really could have used @ LEAST some long sentences ONCE & A While.. to explain just what THAT is? THAT he wrote & WHAT WAS..it ... HE jus' PUT in our HEADS" Edited by an 8 year old? The Silmarllion...Genealogies of people that have @ LEAST 8 names depending on jus' who? you asked & WHEN..? The Children of Hurin...Convoluted Story SSooo confusing his SON had to finish it,... {Did his Son get it Right?}
www.charlie-art.biz "What Your Mind can conceive... charlie can achieve"
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BlackFox
Half-elven
Apr 4 2015, 8:57am
Post #10 of 12
(1130 views)
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Such is my life!
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Beleg Strongbow Cuthalion
Bree
Apr 8 2015, 7:42pm
Post #11 of 12
(1049 views)
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Well, I would definitely have to start with The Hobbit as: "The Hobbit or How a Midget Roused a Sleeping Calamnity". Then The Lord of the rings would be "The Lord of the Rings or A Ring and the Long Crusade". Not very creative, but there it is! =P
~"Many that live deserve death. And some that die deserve life. Can you give it to them? Then do not be too eager to deal out death in judgement. So do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.” ― Gandalf the Grey~
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Philstar22
Registered User
May 5 2015, 9:17pm
Post #12 of 12
(855 views)
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I like the one I saw somewhere that renamed them all the Search for Shiny things. The Search for Shiny Things: Silmaril Edition The Search for Shiny Things: Arkenstone Edition The Search for Shiny Things: One Ring Edition
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