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The One Ring Forums: Tolkien Topics: Reading Room:
How would you humorously rename Tolkien's books?

Sebastian the Hedgehog
Rivendell

Apr 1 2015, 9:18pm

Post #1 of 12 (1251 views)
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How would you humorously rename Tolkien's books? Can't Post

If you had to make a new title for any of Tolkien's books that were completely honest about the story, what would you choose? I'm hoping this can be a little creative and humourous game Smile

For example, I would rename The Hobbit: "The Hobbit or There and Back Again or How the Chiefest and Greatest Calamity of the Third Age Got Roused From a Nap, Harassed by Some Midgets, and Shanked by a Fisherman".


BlackFox
Half-elven


Apr 1 2015, 9:36pm

Post #2 of 12 (1217 views)
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Fun idea! [In reply to] Can't Post

How about The Hobbit Or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love My Tookish Side?



Faleel
Rohan


Apr 2 2015, 6:02pm

Post #3 of 12 (1190 views)
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The Lord of the Rings [In reply to] Can't Post

The Lord of the Rings or The Long Walk to Freedom.

The Silmarillion or Nyquil In Book Form.

The Hobbit or Bilbo Baggins and the 13 Dwarves


Bracegirdle
Valinor


Apr 3 2015, 7:15pm

Post #4 of 12 (1146 views)
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The Lord of the Seventeen Rings [In reply to] Can't Post

and How He Snookered a Gaggle of Elves CoolCool

______________________________________

A Hobbit Goes on a Journey and Comes Back Dead but Rich Pirate Pirate

__________________________________

Sal Marillion Compiles the History of the Universe and Other Trivialities

LaughLaughShockedShocked




Darkstone
Immortal


Apr 3 2015, 7:55pm

Post #5 of 12 (1173 views)
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Hmmmmm.... [In reply to] Can't Post

This is Poetry, Dammit! (Beowulf and the Critics)

Portrait of the Artist as a Middle-Aged Baggins (The Hobbit)

Gollum Takes a Trip (The Lord of the Rings)

Stuff to Make Your Eyes Glaze Over (The Silmarillion)

You Really Don't Have Much of a Life, Do You? - Volumes 1-10 (HoME)

He Dies, She Dies, Everybody Dies (The Children of Hurin)

Yes, Christopher, There Really is a Santa Claus (The Father Christmas Letters)

How to Train Your Dragon (Farmer Giles of Ham)

Dog Gone Tales (Roverandom)

If I Can Swallow It, I Can Pass It (Smith of Wootton Major)

I Catastrophe, We Catastrophe, Eucatastrophe (On Fairy Stories)

I Don’t Think I’ll Ever Finish The Silmarillion (Leaf By Niggle)

I Hate You All (The Adventures of Tom Bombadil)

Look What We Found in an Old Box in the Attic (The Fall of Arthur)

You'd Buy Anything With Tolkien's Name on the Cover, Wouldn't You? (The Legend of Sigurd and Gudrún)

******************************************
No Orc, No Orc!!
It's a wonderful town!!!
Mount Doom blew up,
And the Black Tower's down!!
The orcs all fell in a hole in the ground!
No Orc, No Orc!!
It's a heckuva town!!!

-Lord of the Rings: The Musical, music by Leonard Bernstein, lyrics by Betty Comden and Adolph Green

(This post was edited by Darkstone on Apr 3 2015, 8:06pm)


Brethil
Half-elven


Apr 3 2015, 8:38pm

Post #6 of 12 (1138 views)
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Modar, this needs a *Warning: Risk of Public Snorting* tag [In reply to] Can't Post

Because after reading this the folks in the barber shop tossed me a few looks.


Fantastic. Comprehensive. Cool








BlackFox
Half-elven


Apr 3 2015, 8:41pm

Post #7 of 12 (1132 views)
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Brilliant! // [In reply to] Can't Post

 



Bracegirdle
Valinor


Apr 3 2015, 9:30pm

Post #8 of 12 (1132 views)
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Agreed! And bested again.. [In reply to] Can't Post

And BlackFox lost her swords!

Must be those missing thumbs. Confusticate it! SlySly




Bombadil
Half-elven


Apr 4 2015, 12:09am

Post #9 of 12 (1120 views)
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The Lord of the Rings [In reply to] Can't Post

" A really LOONG Set of 6 Books.. that has sooom REally, Really Loooong Sentences, endless paragraphs
describing the roots of TREES & the moss growing on them?
That COULD have @ least used a "BIT of Bothersome" Editing every now & AGAIN?"
Subtitled "A Travelogue from Absolute Happiness to Ghastly DEATH from the Most
God-Awful Creatures from your
WORST Nightmares..

EDited by TreeBEARD..

The Hobbit
a SHORT tale, that really could have used @ LEAST
some long sentences ONCE & A While..
to explain just what THAT is?
THAT he wrote & WHAT WAS..it
... HE jus' PUT in our HEADS"

Edited by an 8 year old?

The Silmarllion...Genealogies of people that have @ LEAST 8 names
depending on jus' who?
you asked &
WHEN..?

The Children of Hurin...Convoluted Story SSooo confusing
his SON had to finish it,...

{Did his Son get it Right?}
Crazy

www.charlie-art.biz
"What Your Mind can conceive... charlie can achieve"


BlackFox
Half-elven


Apr 4 2015, 8:57am

Post #10 of 12 (1098 views)
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*hangs head* [In reply to] Can't Post

Such is my life! Frown



Beleg Strongbow Cuthalion
Bree


Apr 8 2015, 7:42pm

Post #11 of 12 (1017 views)
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Let's see! [In reply to] Can't Post

Well, I would definitely have to start with The Hobbit as: "The Hobbit or How a Midget Roused a Sleeping Calamnity". Then The Lord of the rings would be "The Lord of the Rings or A Ring and the Long Crusade". Not very creative, but there it is! =P Tongue

~"Many that live deserve death. And some that die deserve life. Can you give it to them? Then do not be too eager to deal out death in judgement. So do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.” ― Gandalf the Grey~



Philstar22
Registered User

May 5 2015, 9:17pm

Post #12 of 12 (823 views)
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Shiny Things [In reply to] Can't Post

I like the one I saw somewhere that renamed them all the Search for Shiny things.

The Search for Shiny Things: Silmaril Edition
The Search for Shiny Things: Arkenstone Edition
The Search for Shiny Things: One Ring Edition

 
 

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