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Big Daddy Balrog
The Shire
Jun 11 2014, 11:21pm
Post #1 of 28
(1077 views)
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What if Valinor still existed to the present day?
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I don't know if this topic ever came up before, but let's play with Tolkien's conceit that his stories occurred several millennia ago. Would Valinor still have existed to the present day? Would they have developed the same technological advances as today or better?
I'd like to think the Elves of Valinor would have developed flying cars and Star Trek transporters by now! Maybe they are the cause of UFO sightings! Or would all that be too much like the thinking of Men?
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Na Vedui
Rohan
Jun 12 2014, 12:22am
Post #2 of 28
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... would be very elegant and decorative, I imagine, and not really like our idea of spaceships
The Valar (as opposed to the Elves) certainly managed to launch a "space-ship" .... I wonder what poor Earendil thinks of all our nasty old space-junk? - it must be getting like a scrap-dealer's backyard up there!
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CuriousG
Half-elven
Jun 12 2014, 1:11am
Post #3 of 28
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I think the Noldor would be the ones behind all the technological innovation, though the Teleri would win all the terrestrial yacht races that they entered incognito. I'd guess the Noldor would be fighting Klingons, consorting with Vorlons, and sharpening their light sabers for the final battle with Darth Morgoth.
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ElendilTheShort
Gondor
Jun 12 2014, 1:43am
Post #5 of 28
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technology didn't advance in Tolkien's stories as it has in our world. probably the elves, maia and valar are smart enough to limit their technological advancement so as not to further mar arda.
I am currently doing mods on my car so it can find the straight path to valinor and I hope to one day be able to drive it far enough to see the world drop away then a silver rain curtain and beyond it a far green country. that would be pretty sweet.
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Meneldor
Valinor
Jun 12 2014, 2:06am
Post #6 of 28
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Send me a PM when you're ready to get it off the ground.
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I have a pilot's license.
They that go down to the sea in ships, that do business in great waters; These see the works of the Lord, and His wonders in the deep.
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J Pierpont Flathead
Rivendell
Jun 12 2014, 2:37am
Post #7 of 28
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Gods don't need technology.
And elves would eschew it as being utterly out of touch with the spirit of their existence - unnatural.
Now his life is full of wonder
But his heart still knows some fear
Of a simple thing he cannot comprehend
Why they try to tear the mountains down
To bring in a couple more
More people, more scars upon the land
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Otaku-sempai
Immortal
Jun 12 2014, 3:36am
Post #8 of 28
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Hypothetically, if the Undying Lands had existed then they were moved into another plane or dimension and would likely still exist today. Many of Ezekiel's bizarre "angels" could have been Elvish UFOs!
'There are older and fouler things than Orcs in the deep places of the world.' - Gandalf the Grey, The Fellowship of the Ring
(This post was edited by Otaku-sempai on Jun 12 2014, 3:37am)
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DanielLB
Immortal
Jun 12 2014, 6:53am
Post #9 of 28
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Valinor in 2014 would be a mess ...
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On Politics
The VNP (Valar National Party) would be deemed racist for only allowing Elves into their country, and closing off their borders to everyone else. Mandos would be ousted, and democratic elections introduced. Arguments over proportional representation vs. first past the post would dominate the headlines. Alqualondë would be demanding independence from Valinor, with Bilbo Baggins donating £1 million to help their cause.
On Overpopulation
With death rates virtually at 0%, overpopulation would become a problem. For decades, successive governments would fail to build the homes needed. In 2008, the number of new homes being started had fallen to its lowest peacetime level since the War of the Wrath – and house building has barely recovered since then. Valinor would be in the grip of a housing shortage. And soaring rents, poor conditions and rising homelessness would be the end result. The government would also introduce new rules to restrict the amount of benefit you can claim for each bedroom, if you are renting your home.
On Natural Resources
90% of Valinor's money would be tied up in the Haven of the Swans, with extravagant new halls of pearl and diamond. The stones found on the beaches would all have been taken to make cheap and nasty looking jewelry. Fracking and nuclear power would be the dominate sources of power.
On Climate Change
Anthropogentic-induced climate change would drive all sorts of crazy and damaging weather for Valinor. Rising sea levels, wetter and warmer winters and heat waves in summer would lead to many Elves migrating elsewhere. Climate change deniers would be automatically entered into the "Reaping".
On Transport
The M3 motorway would be built to connect north Valinor to south Valinor, with the main objective of being a major trade route. Lack of funding, major delays and lane closures mean that it won't be finished until 2450.
On Healthcare
The NHS would be straining. The lack of funding and too few nurses trained would lead to all sorts of negative criticisms.
On Over-fishing
Due to the extinction of tuna, Tirion upon Túna would be renamed to Tirion upon Haddock.
On Popular Culture
Eru reading A Game of Thrones: "That's how I should have done it!"
Eru reading The Hunger Games: "That could keep the population down ..."
Ungoliant's Lair would become a film studio.
On International Relations
Valinor would steal Kim Jong-un limelight, taking the trophy for the most isolated and inaccessible countries in the international community, with severe restrictions on travel into or out of the country.
On Crime
One good thing - crime would be at it's lowest rate since the end of the War of the Ring.
On Education
School children would be entered into a lottery for places in schools. Stories of children getting places in Middle-earth, with a 24 hour commute, would lead to calls for a privatization of education.
On Music
All music would be banned, in order to safegaurd against the Second Music of the Ainur. Music would be equated to Morgoth, and anyone caught twerking would be stoned.
On Ethnic Groups
3 Hobbits and a dwarf comprise of the ethnic minorities. The VNP would think this is plenty.
(This post was edited by DanielLB on Jun 12 2014, 7:00am)
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dormouse
Half-elven
Jun 12 2014, 11:08am
Post #11 of 28
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And who needs technological advances when they can kindle stars and talk to eagles? So much of our technology has to do with things we wish we could do and can't - flight, long-distance communication. It's about overcoming human limitations by our own ingenuity - Valinor shouldn't need any of that, and surely has a better understanding than humanity does about how to live on earth without harming it.
Valinor is still there - somewhere - and we need it to be just as it was, only better!
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CuriousG
Half-elven
Jun 12 2014, 12:45pm
Post #12 of 28
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I'm waiting for Eagles to carry me to Valinor.
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Still waiting... :)
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CuriousG
Half-elven
Jun 12 2014, 12:52pm
Post #13 of 28
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Ack! Frodo, turn that Last Ship around and go home!
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And we thought Feanor messed things up in Valinor. He was nothing compared to modern politicians.
Especially loved this:
"Eru reading A Game of Thrones: "That's how I should have done it!" "
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Lurker in the Mirk
Valinor
Jun 12 2014, 1:16pm
Post #14 of 28
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DanielB, are you an analyst for Valinor Investments Inc?
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On Natural Resources
90% of Valinor's money would be tied up in the Haven of the Swans, with extravagant new halls of pearl and diamond. The stones found on the beaches would all have been taken to make cheap and nasty looking jewelry. Fracking and nuclear power would be the dominate sources of power. Word is Annatar Global Brokerage holds the exclusive commission for managing Ainur Sovereign Fund, the Valinor's trust. 
Fan of both books and movies. Oh, and it seems I have severely misnamed myself... for the moment. 
Appreciating Thranduil, thread by thread: I, II, III, IV, V
"BoFA"= The Battle || "BotFA"/"tBofTA" = The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies
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BlackFox
Half-elven
Jun 12 2014, 2:21pm
Post #15 of 28
(850 views)
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Bravo, Daniel!  
“Our truest life is when we are in dreams awake.” - Henry David Thoreau
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Meneldor
Valinor
Jun 12 2014, 3:34pm
Post #16 of 28
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then becomes Tirion upon Cod, then Tirion upon Herring, Tirion upon Salmon, Tirion upon Mackerel... When will the madness end?!!
They that go down to the sea in ships, that do business in great waters; These see the works of the Lord, and His wonders in the deep.
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Aunt Dora Baggins
Immortal
Jun 12 2014, 9:52pm
Post #17 of 28
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"For DORA BAGGINS in memory of a LONG correspondence, with love from Bilbo; on a large wastebasket. Dora was Drogo's sister, and the eldest surviving female relative of Bilbo and Frodo; she was ninety-nine, and had written reams of good advice for more than half a century."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"A Chance Meeting at Rivendell" and other stories
leleni at hotmail dot com
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Elizabeth
Half-elven
Jun 13 2014, 6:46am
Post #19 of 28
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Elves don't get sick. You need only a small contingent to deal with Frodo and Bilbo, possibly an aging Sam. But how hard is that?
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imin
Valinor
Jun 16 2014, 1:43pm
Post #21 of 28
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If lots of elves are migrating
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Why the over population?
All posts are to be taken as my opinion.
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DanielLB
Immortal
Jun 16 2014, 3:11pm
Post #23 of 28
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Which ever works best. 
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imin
Valinor
Jun 16 2014, 4:23pm
Post #24 of 28
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To me when you said move elsewhere after describing the climate change occurring in Valinor it made me think of moving out of Valinor. But obviously they could be moving internally.
Was the tax on rented bedrooms a reference to the 'bedroom tax'? lol.
All posts are to be taken as my opinion.
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DanielLB
Immortal
Jun 16 2014, 4:51pm
Post #25 of 28
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I put in quite a few references to UK politics (UKIP, Scottish Independence etc.)
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Oh my gosh...
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