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How Tolkien Characters Would Introduce Themselves in a Matriarchal Society

Lurker in the Mirk
Valinor


Jun 7 2014, 1:15am

Post #1 of 9 (577 views)
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How Tolkien Characters Would Introduce Themselves in a Matriarchal Society Can't Post


Quote
“Hi, I’m Aragon, son of Gilraen, son of Ivorwen. Would you or your mother like to rest your feet on me?”
*
“Hi, I’m Celeborn, but you can call me Ofgaladriel.”
*
“Hi, I’m Gimli/Gloin/Thorin/Ori/Dori/Nori/Oin/Dwalin/Fundin/Balin/Bifur/Bofur/Bombur/Dain, son of a super-dope female dwarf who was so cool that we’re forbidden, as men, to utter or even know her name, ever, which is exactly as it should be.”
*
“Hi, I’m Legolas, son of a woman so amazing that she briefly turned Thranduil straight.”
*
“Hi, I’m Boromir, son of Finduilas. When she died, my dad got super grim and weird and ineffectual as a leader, as men so often are.”

*
“My name is Éowyn. I do not bandy words about with men. Get out of my way, or find yourself on the point of my sword. If later I decide I want to amuse myself with your body, I will send word. You may sleep in the stables.”
*
“Hi, I’m Dior, son of Lúthien. Nothing a woman does should be questioned, but my mother should NOT have become mortal for Beren. She should have married mortal male after mortal male, burying each of them when they ceased to be useful to her, and in this way, could have lived forever in glory.”
*
“Hi, I’m Éomer, son of Théodwyn. Had my mother lived, she would never have been taken in by Grima Wormtongue, the name alone would have been a dead giveaway.”
*
“Hi, I’m Lotho, son of Lobelia. Anything bad you’ve heard about my mother is due to the whining of men who feel entitled to be catered to. She’s actually a delightful, if ‘difficult’ woman. How often we decide that women are ‘difficult’ when they agitate for what they want! May I offer you some tea?”
*
“Hi, I’m Sauron. I never had a mother.”

(SOURCE)


Fan of both books and movies. Oh, and it seems I have severely misnamed myself... for the moment.

Thranduil Appreciation: I, II, III, IV, V

"BoFA"= The Battle || "BotFA"/"tBofTA" = The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies


DaughterofLaketown
Gondor


Jun 7 2014, 1:32am

Post #2 of 9 (370 views)
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This is absolutely awesome! [In reply to] Can't Post

The Thranduil one and Lobelia one where especially funny. I was always curious as to a fantasy boom based on a matriarchal society. If interested read The Mists of Avalon. Wonderful Book.


(This post was edited by DaughterofLaketown on Jun 7 2014, 1:32am)


Maciliel
Valinor


Jun 7 2014, 1:36am

Post #3 of 9 (368 views)
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hilarious! [In reply to] Can't Post

 
hysterical, lurkmirk -- thanks for the repost.

i'm especially fond of "super-dope female dwarf" the boromir line, and the legolas line.

cheers : )

.


aka. fili orc-enshield
+++++++++++++++++++
the scene, as i understand it, is exceptionally well-written. fili (in sort of a callback to the scene with the eagles), calls out "thorRIIIIIIN!!!" just as he sees the pale orc veer in for the kill. he picks up the severed arm of an orc which is lying on the ground, swings it up in desperation, effectively blocking the pale orc's blow. and thus, forever after, fili is known as "fili orc-enshield."

this earns him deep respect from his hard-to-please uncle. as well as a hug. kili wipes his boots on the pale orc's glory box. -- maciliel telpemairo


Lurker in the Mirk
Valinor


Jun 8 2014, 2:17am

Post #4 of 9 (311 views)
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Thanks DoL... I do remember Mists of Avalon from my long gone teenage days // [In reply to] Can't Post

 


Fan of both books and movies. Oh, and it seems I have severely misnamed myself... for the moment.

Thranduil Appreciation: I, II, III, IV, V

"BoFA"= The Battle || "BotFA"/"tBofTA" = The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies


Lurker in the Mirk
Valinor


Jun 8 2014, 2:19am

Post #5 of 9 (312 views)
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Heh, I live those too, though I suspect [In reply to] Can't Post

the Legolas one was fabricated by someone uber-jealous of Thranduil's beauty Tongue


Fan of both books and movies. Oh, and it seems I have severely misnamed myself... for the moment.

Thranduil Appreciation: I, II, III, IV, V

"BoFA"= The Battle || "BotFA"/"tBofTA" = The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies


Elanor of Rohan
Lorien


Jun 8 2014, 9:10am

Post #6 of 9 (308 views)
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Irresistible [In reply to] Can't Post

the fact that Eowyn does not feel the need to introduce herself as Theodwyn's daughter...
She is Eowyn, that's enough... and you may sleep in the stables (to quote David Salo, the official LOTR Tolkien languages translator, she is "the one who rejoyces in horses")
Evil


Lurker in the Mirk
Valinor


Jun 8 2014, 1:57pm

Post #7 of 9 (313 views)
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In a matriarchal society [In reply to] Can't Post

A woman's confidence in herself speaks loud Smile She's the only woman on the list, I'd say she's just showing her swag


Fan of both books and movies. Oh, and it seems I have severely misnamed myself... for the moment.

Appreciating Thranduil, thread by thread: I, II, III, IV, V

"BoFA"= The Battle || "BotFA"/"tBofTA" = The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies


CuriousG
Half-elven


Jun 8 2014, 2:57pm

Post #8 of 9 (285 views)
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Egad, a femine thread. // [In reply to] Can't Post

 


Aunt Dora Baggins
Immortal


Jun 9 2014, 4:08am

Post #9 of 9 (278 views)
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Numbers 3 and 4 made me laugh out loud. :-) // [In reply to] Can't Post

 


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"For DORA BAGGINS in memory of a LONG correspondence, with love from Bilbo; on a large wastebasket. Dora was Drogo's sister, and the eldest surviving female relative of Bilbo and Frodo; she was ninety-nine, and had written reams of good advice for more than half a century."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"A Chance Meeting at Rivendell" and other stories

leleni at hotmail dot com
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


 
 

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