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Tolkienia Times Special *Founders Day* Bulletin!

Ethel Duath

Apr 25 2014, 10:20pm

Post #1 of 10 (229 views)
Tolkienia Times Special *Founders Day* Bulletin! Can't Post

The Editors of the Tolkienia Times are pleased to announce the commencement of the annual Founders Day Holiday taking place on theonering.net (also known as TORn).

This special bulletin contains a link to the message boards, as well as an exclusive report (on the second half of this page) describing the events that transpired earlier in the day, and in the week before the festivities began. The article includes some highlights of the Four Founders of TORn's Exclusive Free Courtesy Tour of Tolkienia (a gift from the mayor) which took place yesterday.

As in previous years, our annual announcement of these unique festivities includes an encouragement for all to attend the day's events at http://newboards.theonering.net/...orum/perl/gforum.cgi

In view of this, the TTimes is making an official announcement concerning Tolkienia's participation in these events.

As per the above bulletin, since Tolkienia’s local weather has been canceled, none of our planned festivities inside the Tolkienian borders can take place. This bulletin was received by DanielLB, the head of the Tolkienian National Weather Service, by crebainfax just before the opening ceremony in the Tolkiena Town Square. Luckily, TORn very graciously allowed most of the events to be moved to their own venues.

Mayor Ethel wishes to convey her deep gratitude and declarations of lasting friendship to all the leadership and citizens of TORn for their generosity and flexibility in finding space and local guides for all the transferred events.
However, the Tolkienian “Tea, Tour, and Tasting” which was scheduled for the Four Founders as our gift to them for their years of service to TORn and to the enjoyment and advancement of all things Tolkien has gone off without (much of) a hitch.

(See below for article.)


Fun, Frenzy, Food, Awake!

Citizens of Tolkienia awoke this morning to find that the strange goings on in many parts of the country over the last several days were not only continuing, but had reached a head by mid-morning, when it was discovered that all local weather had been canceled.

Luckily, the tour the Mayor's office arranged for the Four Founders of TORn, none of whom had ever before had the opportunity to visit, had taken place the previous day.

The V.I.P. tour trolly was still running most of the day for those who had pre-purchased, although many complained about the lack of weather. Tours between 4:00 and 6:00 P.M. have been canceled, however, due to the increasing blandness of the weather-bereft scenery. The DLB National Weather Service says that weather is nearly 100% likely to return this evening, beginning about an hour before dusk, but may disappear again during most of the day tomorrow.

The Founders tour was reported as a success, not only by the guides, but by the quartet of dignitaries themselves. However, the Department of Foreign Relations reported that some Kiplanders on a limited visa had apparently become lost or possibly misunderstood the deadline for departure, as one of our distinguished visitors on their walking tour of the Carrock reported sighting a large Panthera pardus slinking into the deep woods to the west of the outcropping. Luckily, no one was injured.

Previous to today, there have been other unusual sightings of dwarvish individuals clad in variously colored hoods and cloaks (the pantherus was rumored to have been seen taking some offense at the dwarf clad in leopard print). These rather secretive persons have been spotted both individually and in small groups, and have been noticed pushing refrigerated carts, and carrying microphones, bundles of scrolls, garment bags, and pairs of pants.

With the mid-morning announcement of the missing weather, all these individuals disappeared (muttering and grumbling) in the direction of the Tolkienia Underground. A large elm was seen assisting the purple-hooded individual with her various coat hangers and long, heavy fabric bags.

This reporter recommends all curious Tolkienian individuals make their way to the Underground and take the Straight Road Train (behind the turnstile to the left of the entrance), and purchase at least 4 transfers, especially those labeled "Home Page,""Off-Topic," "Main," and "Feedback."

The editors of the Tolkienia Times wish to congratulate theonering.net and its illustrious and imaginative Founders for the first fifteen years of TORn's existence, and also wish to send their hopes and expectations of many decades to come of exploring the riches of J.R.R. Tolkien's universe in the spirit of celebration, scholarship, and camaraderie.

Ethel Duath for the Editors and Reporters of the Times

(This post was edited by Ethel Duath on Apr 25 2014, 10:24pm)


Apr 25 2014, 11:42pm

Post #2 of 10 (124 views)
My goodness! [In reply to] Can't Post

Panthera pardus slinking around? What is this world coming to???

Any word on the leopard-skin attired Dwarf's condition? I have a weak spot for dwarves who dare to be different!

And for the rest of you, say HELLO to our Blue Hood and Cloak Party Dwarf, the one and only Ethel Duath!



Apr 25 2014, 11:53pm

Post #3 of 10 (118 views)
I hear there are special Trolley Tours available! [In reply to] Can't Post

This ad just came across the In desk...Attention: Mayor Ethel. Wink

The Third TORn Amateur Symposium kicks off this Sunday, April 13th, in the Reading Room. Come and join us for Tolkien-inspired writings!

**CoH Rem. Just sayin' **


Apr 26 2014, 7:46am

Post #4 of 10 (106 views)
This is brilliant. // [In reply to] Can't Post


Tol Eressea

Apr 26 2014, 2:18pm

Post #5 of 10 (104 views)
Oh, My!! [In reply to] Can't Post

Weather cancelled! Prowling Panther pardusi! Leopard-print Dwarves! My, what a time for me to go 'wandering'!

So glad our Mayor managed to capture it all!!

Call me Rem, and remember, not all who ramble are lost...Uh...where was I?

Forum Admin / Moderator

Apr 26 2014, 6:58pm

Post #6 of 10 (89 views)
How strange about that weather! [In reply to] Can't Post

Was DLB looking out of the correct "Windows"? Angelic

Fortunately, all realms of Tolkien-dom are easily accessible from Tolkienia. Smile

A most happy and prosperous Founders' Day to you, Mayor Ethel, and thank you for your continued service to this most unique and admirable Community!


"I desired dragons with a profound desire"


Apr 27 2014, 2:46am

Post #7 of 10 (77 views)
Whoa... I believe we'll "weather" this, too :D // [In reply to] Can't Post



6th draft of TH:AUJ Geeky Observation List - November 28, 2013
3rd draft of TH:DOS Geeky Observation List - January 2, 2014


"There is more in you of good than you know, child of the kindly West."

I'm SO HAPPY these new films take me back to that magical world!!

TIME Google Calendar
TORn's Geeky Observations Lists (updated soon)

Forum Admin / Moderator

Apr 27 2014, 6:07am

Post #8 of 10 (91 views)
A Letter to the Editor [In reply to] Can't Post

I sit and wonder whether
The fact that there's no weather
Means a contumacious wether
Might slip his leather tether
And go tearing round the town?

Or p'raps we'll see the heather
Torn up by some roaming heifer
Turn as dry and light as feathers
And go floating off together
O'er The Hill's now balding crown?

Can the TORNsibs all endeavor
(By recruiting whomsoever)
To raise atmospheric pressure
With loud expressions of their pleasure
At the day of TORN's renown?

And could each joyful measure
Weave a tale sufficient clever
As we chatter all together
To restore forecasting severed
And bring some weather back around?

A Concerned Citizen


"Dark is the water of Kheled-zâram, and cold are the springs of Kibil-nâla, and fair were the many-pillared halls of Khazad-dűm in Elder Days before the fall of mighty kings beneath the stone."

(This post was edited by Silverlode on Apr 27 2014, 6:07am)

Ethel Duath

Apr 27 2014, 4:52pm

Post #9 of 10 (75 views)
Quoth the Mayor [In reply to] Can't Post

Weather? More!

Ethel Duath

Apr 27 2014, 11:53pm

Post #10 of 10 (67 views)
Editors' reply: [In reply to] Can't Post

The DLB Weather Service reports that Whether a Weather a Wiz there was, it's not Gandalf's job, despite the buzz.

But he is the logical choice to, as you say, "raise the atmospheric pressure."

The local shirriff as well as the entire town council (not to mention the Mayor) are attempting to locate the elusive Grey Pilgrim, do exactly what you suggest,
and recruit him as a temporary member of the weather team. Or Staff. We will keep you Posted.


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