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What's your favourite piece of non-Tolkien dialogue from the films....

The Shire

Mar 8 2014, 3:06pm

Post #1 of 11 (350 views)
What's your favourite piece of non-Tolkien dialogue from the films.... Can't Post

Gamling: Too few have come. We cannot defeat the armies of Mordor.

Theoden: No, we cannot. But we will meet them in battle nonetheless.

That's perfect. One of the sublime moments in ROTK, for me. I also like the scene between Aragorn and Haleth (a totally made-up character) in the build-up to the battle of Helm's Deep in the TTT. 'The men are saying that we will not live out the night. They say that it is hopeless...'

There must be plenty of pieces of non-Tolkien dialogue in the movies that work for you. The dwarves climbing out of the toilet in DOS somehow tickles my funny-bone, although I appreciate that it's not for everyone.


'But ere long it escaped our skill, and we dared not continue the hunt; for we were drawing nigh to Dol Guldur, and that is still a very evil place; we do not go that way'


Mar 8 2014, 8:14pm

Post #2 of 11 (244 views)
Boy that is a toughie... [In reply to] Can't Post

Let's see. There are so many good pieces, as you said. But a few standouts are: "Let's hunt some Orc", "My friends you bow to no one." "For Frodo." Some others that I like are:
"Shall I describe it to you. Or would you like me to find you a box?"
Frodo-"What's in this?"
Sam-"Nothing. Just a bit of seasoning. I thought maybe if we was having a roast chicken one night or something."
Frodo-"Roast chicken?!"
Sam-"You never know."
And finally, what has to be the silliest dialogue ever... "Fangorn? What madness drove them in there?" Umm? Maybe the big, steamy pile of dead Orcs and Uruks? Maybe.
Anyway, that's not near all, but it's a start. Cool


Mar 9 2014, 4:38am

Post #3 of 11 (211 views)
All of those plus [In reply to] Can't Post

The Tauriel Feast of Starlight scene.

My avatar photo is Lake Tekapo in New Zealand's South Island. Taken by me in 2004 on a Red Carpet Tours LOTR Movie Location Tour. 'Twas the Vacation of a Lifetime!

pictures taken while on the tour are here:

The Shire

Mar 9 2014, 7:16pm

Post #4 of 11 (195 views)
Some excellent finds there... [In reply to] Can't Post

.....but I can't go along with you about Gimli.

'Fangorn? What madness drove them in there?' Believe me, I take what you say about the big, steamy pile of dead Orcs and Uruks, but you have to acknowledge that Fangorn is probably the most unrealistic forest of all time. If I was a hobbit I wouldn't go in there without serious IT help. 'Don't go that way, Merry. At least the Orcs were real...'.

On the subject of that, I'm prepared to admit that maybe Gimli's knowledge of Fangorn was handed down by his forefathers, but the same can't be said of the Emyn Muil...

'An impassable labyrinth of razor-sharp rocks...' Nice words, but there's about as much chance of Gimli being aware of this as there is of Legolas having an encyclopaedic knowledge of Dunland's birdlife.

I'd forgotten that Legolas/Gimli sequence on the battlements of Helm's Deep. Very funny, all the more so for being surrounded with so much tension. I'd include Boromir's 'they have a cave troll' in the same bracket.



Mar 9 2014, 7:48pm

Post #5 of 11 (176 views)
The whole Smeagol/Gollum conversation in TTT// [In reply to] Can't Post


Is there a Tolkien topic that you have wanted to look into more deeply and write about your thoughts on it? If so, we'd like to hear from you for the next TORn Amateur Symposium- coming in April. Happy writing!


Mar 11 2014, 12:10am

Post #6 of 11 (157 views)
'If you're referring to the incident with the Dragon... [In reply to] Can't Post

...I was barely involved. All I did was give your uncle a little nudge out of the door."

"Our list of allies grows thin."

"Gondor has no king. Gondor needs no king."

"The Nine have left Minas Morgul."

"Tell me, 'friend', when did Saruman the wise abandon reason for madness?!"

"They have a cave troll."

And a slight, but wonderful change:

"I’m glad to be with you, Samwise Gamgee…here at the end of all things"

Brothers, sisters,
I was Elf once.
We danced together
Under the Two Trees.
We sang as the soft gold of Laurelin
And the bright silver of Telperion,
Brought forth the dawn of the world.
Then I was taken.

Brothers, sisters,
In my torment I kept faith,
And I waited.
But you never came.
And when I returned you drew sword,
And when I called your names you drew bow.
Was my Eldar beauty all,
And my soul nothing?

So be it.
I will return your hatred,
And I am hungry.

(This post was edited by Darkstone on Mar 11 2014, 12:10am)


Mar 11 2014, 6:49pm

Post #7 of 11 (124 views)
Going to Mordor [In reply to] Can't Post

In the book, Frodo tells Sam that he is going to Mordor, and Sam replies, "Of course you are. And I'm coming with you." In the film, Frodo tells Sam that he is going to Mordor - alone! Sam has the same reply, but the addition of one word makes Sam's loyalty just a bit stronger, and produces a smile without calling attention to itself.

I wish that all the alterations to dialogue from the books were so elegant.


Mar 12 2014, 6:39pm

Post #8 of 11 (98 views)
Eomer: "You should not encourage him." Eowyn : "And you should not doubt him." [In reply to] Can't Post

There are not many times when I agree with the writers' attempts to improve on the original work, but there are some great lines that capture the spirit of characters or are just plain fun.

"We've had one yes. What about second breakfast?" (This is one of my favorite "made up" bits.)

"If you're referring to the incident with the Dragon, I was barely involved. All I did was give your uncle a little nudge out of the door."

"Mordor, Gandalf, is it left or right?" (really illustrates just how out of his element Frodo is.)

"Smeagol lied."

"Remember today little brother."

I'm sure there are more, but those are some good ones.

 photo Desolation-of-Smaug2_zpsc1584ee1.jpg
Tauriel: So let me get this straight sir, this Elwen girl is back on something called TORn, and rather than just tell her to stop stalking you, you'd like me to show up in a movie I have no business being in as a ploy to distract her, and nevermind the wrath of countless Tolkien fans who will be calling for my destruction?

Legolas: That about sums it up. Besides, some people might like you. Oh, and to be on the safe side, can we pretend to be a couple too?

Finding Frodo
Tol Eressea

Mar 15 2014, 4:24am

Post #9 of 11 (79 views)
"I would have followed you, my brother, my captain, my king."// [In reply to] Can't Post


Where's Frodo?


Mar 17 2014, 4:05am

Post #10 of 11 (72 views)
Somewhat OFF subject [In reply to] Can't Post

Possibly my LEAST favorite quip by Tolkien, (as Gandalf and the Three Hunters arrive at Edoras). From the book of course.

"Hail, comers from afar!"

Kinda leading us into the somewhat archaic speech patterns of the Rohirrim I suppose.

From World's End then he turned away,
and yearned again to find afar .
his home through shadows journeying,
and burning as an island star . . .

-Bilbo Baggins

(This post was edited by Bracegirdle on Mar 17 2014, 4:07am)


Mar 17 2014, 12:53pm

Post #11 of 11 (88 views)
Where's Frodo? [In reply to] Can't Post

East of the Sun, West of the Moon


From World's End then he turned away,
and yearned again to find afar .
his home through shadows journeying,
and burning as an island star . . .

-Bilbo Baggins


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