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The One Ring Forums: Tolkien Topics: Main:
What are the orcs doing now?
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noWizardme
Tol Eressea


Sep 15 2013, 7:00am

Post #51 of 76 (267 views)
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Uruk Hai- where you can't tell the cheerleaders from the football team // [In reply to] Can't Post

 

Disclaimers: The words of noWizardme may stand on their heads! I'm often wrong about things, and its fun to be taught more....

"nowimė I am in the West, Furincurunir to the Dwarves (or at least, to their best friend) and by other names in other lands. Mostly they just say 'Oh no it's him - look busy!' "
Or "Hold off! unhand me, grey-beard loon!"


Lissuin
Tol Eressea


Sep 15 2013, 2:20pm

Post #52 of 76 (256 views)
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The mind reels! [In reply to] Can't Post

Uruk Hai cheer squad greeting opposing teams:

Hi! Hello, and how do you do?
We are the Uruks
and we welcome you!
We stand proud for the White Hand.
We wish you well and luck to you!

But as the game progresses:

We Will, We Will,
Rock you down,
Shake you up,
Like a volcano about to erupt,
Mighty mighty Uruks here to stay,
We'll rock you all night, and rock you all day!
Whoaa Go Uruks!

And in the fourth quarter, they just get mean:

A-T-T-A-C-K
Attack the quarterback
And knock him flat, right on his back
Pow!


malickfan
Gondor


Sep 15 2013, 2:31pm

Post #53 of 76 (244 views)
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Serving as Screenwriters on The Transfomers Series [In reply to] Can't Post

Why hurt us phyically when they can kill our brain cells slowly via the medium of film.

I don't have much to say.



Kim
Valinor


Sep 15 2013, 5:53pm

Post #54 of 76 (248 views)
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They tried to star in the new Orc-entoons, [In reply to] Can't Post

but they could never be as #majestic as Thorin! Laugh


Kim
Valinor


Sep 15 2013, 6:03pm

Post #55 of 76 (242 views)
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Haha - awesome! // [In reply to] Can't Post

 


Hamfast Gamgee
Gondor

Sep 15 2013, 11:20pm

Post #56 of 76 (231 views)
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If we are to believe in the thick of it [In reply to] Can't Post

One of them was at the heart of the New Labour ! Malcolm Tucker's behaviour was very Orc-like.


Werde Spinner
Rohan


Sep 16 2013, 2:06pm

Post #57 of 76 (220 views)
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They became dentists. [In reply to] Can't Post

They get paid to inflict pain. Laugh Just kidding.

Although the thought of Uruk-hair cheerleaders is a sight to imagine... Has anyone tried to photoshop this?

Then again, they could have become sea monters. My Sunday crossword listed 'orc' as the answer to that hint. Guess Morgoth and Sauron went a little too far with that genetic engineering!

"I had forgotten that. It is hard to be sure of anything among so many marvels. The world is all grown strange. Elf and Dwarf in company walk in our daily fields; and folk speak with the Lady of the Wood and yet live; and the Sword comes back to war that was broken in the long ages ere the fathers of our fathers rode into the Mark! How shall a man judge what to do in such times?"

"As he ever has judged. Good and ill have not changed since yesteryear; nor are they one thing among Elves and Dwarves and another among Men. It is a man's part to discern them, as much in the Golden Wood as in his own house."


Meneldor
Tol Eressea


Sep 16 2013, 7:55pm

Post #58 of 76 (220 views)
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Orc is a term used [In reply to] Can't Post

of sea monsters several times in Ariosto's Orlando Furioso.




They that go down to the sea in ships, that do business in great waters; These see the works of the Lord, and His wonders in the deep.


Werde Spinner
Rohan


Sep 17 2013, 3:14pm

Post #59 of 76 (186 views)
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Huh. Never heard of this. [In reply to] Can't Post

 

"I had forgotten that. It is hard to be sure of anything among so many marvels. The world is all grown strange. Elf and Dwarf in company walk in our daily fields; and folk speak with the Lady of the Wood and yet live; and the Sword comes back to war that was broken in the long ages ere the fathers of our fathers rode into the Mark! How shall a man judge what to do in such times?"

"As he ever has judged. Good and ill have not changed since yesteryear; nor are they one thing among Elves and Dwarves and another among Men. It is a man's part to discern them, as much in the Golden Wood as in his own house."


Ruxendil_Thoorg
Grey Havens


Sep 17 2013, 5:00pm

Post #60 of 76 (189 views)
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I don't know about now, but in the late 70s they founded a planet.... [In reply to] Can't Post

...populated by humanoid natives whose males bear a striking resemblance to a young, slim Robin Williams.

A bag is like a hole that you can carry with you.

http://newboards.theonering.net/...forum_view_expanded;


Ruxendil_Thoorg
Grey Havens


Sep 17 2013, 5:11pm

Post #61 of 76 (191 views)
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Not sure what they might be doing now, but the simplest answer is probably the right one.... [In reply to] Can't Post

...at least according to the principle of Orc-am's razor.

A bag is like a hole that you can carry with you.

http://newboards.theonering.net/...forum_view_expanded;


Ruxendil_Thoorg
Grey Havens


Sep 17 2013, 5:15pm

Post #62 of 76 (477 views)
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They're in Gotham City, serving time in the padded cells of.... [In reply to] Can't Post

... Orcham Asylum.

A bag is like a hole that you can carry with you.

http://newboards.theonering.net/...forum_view_expanded;


Ostadan
Rivendell

Sep 17 2013, 5:22pm

Post #63 of 76 (180 views)
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JRRT's Words [In reply to] Can't Post

"But Orcs and Trolls spoke as they would, without love of words or things; and their language was actually more degraded and filthy than I have shown it. I do not suppose that any will wish for a closer rendering, though models are easy to find. Much the same sort of talk can still be heard among the orc-minded; dreary and repetitive with hatred and contempt, too long removed from good to retain even verbal vigour, save in the ears of those to whom only the squalid sounds strong. "

One of the defects in the Hobbit film is having Azog & Co. speaking (David Salo's implementation of) the Black Speech of Mordor. It is inconsistent with the Goblin-town denizens (and the Lord of the Rings film orcs) in the first place, not in keeping with Tolkien's characterization of orc-speech in the second place, and distances us from the dialogue dramatically (due to subtitling) in the third place.


Ruxendil_Thoorg
Grey Havens


Sep 17 2013, 6:49pm

Post #64 of 76 (183 views)
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Practicing politics in our legislatures [In reply to] Can't Post

 ...by introducing bills for Orc-barrel spending in their districts, while demonizing Orc-barrel spending in other districts.

A bag is like a hole that you can carry with you.

http://newboards.theonering.net/...forum_view_expanded;


Kim
Valinor


Sep 17 2013, 7:59pm

Post #65 of 76 (172 views)
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bwahahahahahaha! :-) // [In reply to] Can't Post

 


Lissuin
Tol Eressea


Sep 18 2013, 4:47pm

Post #66 of 76 (161 views)
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R_T, I was wondering [In reply to] Can't Post

how Ruxendil_ Thoorg could have passed up a thread called "What are the orcs doing now?". Very glad to see Your Lorcuaciousness join us and add to the silliness.
Laugh


Ruxendil_Thoorg
Grey Havens


Sep 18 2013, 5:16pm

Post #67 of 76 (155 views)
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Ruxy-come-lately [In reply to] Can't Post

Thanks for your concern, dear Liss! Yeah, unfortunately I arrived as a straggler to the orc-casion.

Lorcuaciousness, hehe! Laugh. I'm glad not to have missed out on the j-orc-ularity! Wink

A bag is like a hole that you can carry with you.

http://newboards.theonering.net/...forum_view_expanded;


Heatherleawv
Bree


Sep 18 2013, 11:58pm

Post #68 of 76 (170 views)
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I [In reply to] Can't Post

heard they were going to be in a new movie called Orcnado! Wink

All that glitters is not gold...


CaptainMorgan
The Shire


Sep 19 2013, 4:12pm

Post #69 of 76 (128 views)
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Investment Banking [In reply to] Can't Post

"But many an orc in a big bank office,
If he wishes to earn his year-end bonus,
Must manage somehow to get through,
More dirty work than ever I do!"


Arrrr!

YO HO HO, A LIPEY LIBER FWEE
-Captain Edward Dregg

A pirate always has two reasons for doing anything: a good reason and the real reason.
-Captain JP Morgan


Ruxendil_Thoorg
Grey Havens


Sep 19 2013, 5:00pm

Post #70 of 76 (129 views)
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agent to producer: "Hey, do I got an act for you!...." [In reply to] Can't Post

"....It starts off with a family of Orcs... they...(something describable only in Black Speech)... and then the kids.... (something only comprehensible in specific dialect of Orcish too disturbing to be expressed in Black Speech).... then the dad.... (in a pig-Latin-esque variation of Black Speech in mockery of Quenya called pig-Quenya, with syntax derived from Trollish cockney )... the end."

(Shocked silence, followed by:)

"What's the act called?"

(Agent's excited reply:)


"...the Arist-Orc-crats!"


Apologies in advance.

A bag is like a hole that you can carry with you.

http://newboards.theonering.net/...forum_view_expanded;


Lissuin
Tol Eressea


Sep 19 2013, 5:30pm

Post #71 of 76 (137 views)
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Apology accepted. [In reply to] Can't Post

Sly


Otaku-sempai
Half-elven


Sep 20 2013, 12:27am

Post #72 of 76 (114 views)
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Just Orking Around. // [In reply to] Can't Post

 

'There are older and fouler things than Orcs in the deep places of the world.' - Gandalf the Grey, The Fellowship of the Ring


Meneldor
Tol Eressea


Sep 20 2013, 12:30am

Post #73 of 76 (128 views)
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It is a glorious thing [In reply to] Can't Post

To be a goblin king!


They that go down to the sea in ships, that do business in great waters; These see the works of the Lord, and His wonders in the deep.


Brethil
Half-elven


Sep 20 2013, 2:52am

Post #74 of 76 (110 views)
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Do ye think any of 'em are speakin' Pirate lingo? // [In reply to] Can't Post

 

Is there a Tolkien topic that you have wanted to look into more deeply, and write about your thoughts on it? If so, we'd like to hear from you for the next TORn Amateur Symposium- coming in November. Happy writing!








Kim
Valinor


Sep 20 2013, 4:38am

Post #75 of 76 (125 views)
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the black speech o' the pirates appears to be all over the boards today :-) // [In reply to] Can't Post

 

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