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The One Ring Forums: Tolkien Topics: Fan Art:
A work in progress: the entire history of Arda in poetry.

Tol Eressea

Jun 25 2013, 3:39am

Post #1 of 5 (291 views)
A work in progress: the entire history of Arda in poetry. Can't Post

I've already posted this in the pollantir, but thought it might be more appropriate here. ( I didn't see that this was the place to post poetry XD)

I'm currently working on the tremendous task of transcribing the whole history of Arda into verse. I have been working for a bit on this, but I've been recently encouraged to post online for more opinions.

Any thoughts or comments? Possible substitutions or unclear passages? Did I forget anything?

Shout out to GansoChico , not on ToRN ,for the sub word Eš.

Now for the legal stuff;

Sharing this work after Deletion of this disclaimer ,violates the fair use contract outlined here. By sharing this work , electronically or by any other means, you agree to uphold the conditions set forth here.

I reserve all full authorial rights to this work. No unapproved use for commercial purposes is allowed. You are free to share non-commercially and privately , under the conditions of fair use, but please cite the author and source. Before any massive distribution of this work, please see the author for conditions of disclosure. No alterations or additions may be made to this work or disclaimer, without authorial consent.

Any suggestions made on your behalf will be credited as well as The author can, but the altered words WILL ultimately become intellectual property of the author. The author does not bind himself absolutely to credit, publicly or otherwise, the emendations made or suggested by the readers. Each suggestion made will be considered and use made as the author sees fit.

I wouldn't take your paycheck or job, so please don't take my work for your own credit.

I've added and snipped a bit the beginning does this read better?

In the beginning there was One
Ere yet the Moon or Sun
Did shine their face
Upon those of Elven race

The All-Father, Illuvatar
saw the Void stretch wide and far
Then made He the Ainur strong
And taught them to make song

They sang their own songs pleasantly
One or two, or only three
And as they increased in harmony
Each new voice added his beauty

Then Illuvatar a theme did unfold
And by their music, it he would mold
Taking up song they did sing
Thoughts unfolding like flowers in Spring

A great and powerful melody
Everchanging as the sea
Rising and falling in a swell
Filling the the hall where they did dwell

But then it entered the mind
Of Melkor, to follow his own design
To him was given the greatest gift of power
And he rose alone, tall as a tower

Dark and bitter thoughts did he conceive
Apart from his brethren, and he did weave
His own ambitions and desire,
(Lust for Eru's Secret Fire)
Into lyric ,black and grim
Discord rising about him

No longer did they sing one song alone
For in every note pride's seed was sown
At last those near him began to falter,
And yet others began to alter
Their own song and did forsake
The melody they first set out to make

Higher and louder the tumult grew
Until Illuvatar started anew
A song different and more brave
Against which Melkor's did rave

New phrases sounded in their ears
Softly falling , like gentle tears
A lament for what is lost, but shall be
Forever held in memory

This agony of passion frail
Was eas'ly drowned by the gale
That Melkor and his followers made
The Ainur then, their music stayed.

Strong his song in truth became
Without any grief or shame
Trying to challenge Eru's plan
But just then ,a third began

Eru's song was rich and full
It shone out as a jewel
A very pattern of his heart
In which no Ainur had a part

Melkor's song turned to braying
Never able but still assaying
To overcome and subdue
This final theme ,as on it drew

The Ainur's reply ,artless but loud
Without form, but high and proud
Seeking only the mastery to claim
By volume, this was its only aim

And as the new anthem rolled,
Taking the place of the old,
The defiant notes could only add
To the beauty it already had

Melkor tried, but I vain
To conquer this, the final strain
Only to make it greatest than the first
It's glory growing with each verse.

At the end did toll
One final note, out did roll
Higher than heaven, deeper than sea
Crashed, bringing all Ainur to the knee

Silence in His{Eru's} halls did reign
No one took up the refrain
The rebellious now stood in shame
But no words of judgement now came

The All-Father did now say
"Great has Melko shown himself today,
But that he might know that I am first,
And for power quench his thirst.
I bid him come and see what is wrought
The very offspring of my thought"

He showed them a vision of the world
Before the ends, back were curled
And breaking in upon their sight
Fields of green in realms of night.

Oceans fair, blue, and deep
Mountains rugged, high and steep
Valleys low, filled with flowers
Kissed by Sun and summer showers

Also bitter cold, snow, hail, and sleet
Melko's doing, flat ice's sheet.
Burning heats did come as well
The tale of meddling do they tell

Arda now was strongly made
Its foundations firmly laid
Precious gem and metals shone
Of the world forming every bone

But greatest of all visions, they did see
Other creatures, fair and free
Lesser than they, but noble still
Having mind and body, soul and will

No sooner was this scene rehearsed
Than the vision was dispersed
The full history they had seen
But so little time had they to glean

Now cry went up from those gathered there
Who wished the world with them to share
Also Joy, happiness, and mirth
and to run wild upon the turf

These creatures, unlike themselves,
Were the firstborn race of the Elves
Destined the nightshades of Middle-Earthh to roam
Far from Aman's blessed home

Of the secondborn they caught but glimpse
Yet they became masters of Arda since
Mortal men, waxing old
Whose final fate is nowhere told

For the Elves, sojourn in Mandos' hall ordained
Before flesh and bone they might reclaim
No such fate do men share
A place for their spirit, Eru's sole care

Besides these things, they each saw a part
Of this living world, after their own heart
Something fair that they loved most
Carried away from this momentary ghost

The winds and high airs, Manwe loved
Ever changing as they moved
Later called Sulimo,
He is lord of winds that blow

Ulmo's love was the sea
The depths delighted him especially
Allied to Manwe, as the heat forth did bring
Clouds and rain from his cool springs

Aule saw the possibilities
Of molding metal by degrees.
A fierce desire to mold and make
In him did now awake
Of forge and tongs, with hammers clink
But not of keeping did he think.

He would the Eldar's teacher be
Of metalsmith and filigree
Before they left Elvenhome,
Red blood upon the sea-foam

Then Illuvatar did say
"I know what it is, ye wish this day
To go and in the world to live
To teach, make, laugh and give

Now will I give this vision the Secret Fire
All the events you have seen will transpire.
According to my plan, you will see
Them to follow my melody.
For though altered by Melko's craft
All things must obey Me at last

Those of you who would now prepare
To enter the world, with my children to share,
May go now with my leave
But this one thing you must receive

To bind yourselves to live within
And reside in it until the end
When I call my children home,
Then I will make my full plan known."

The vision took shape before there eyes
As some of them left their home in the skies
To enter into the world they had seen
Everything alive and green

But coming in, they found it bare
Nothing living or growing there
For the vision showed what was to be done
And everything yet to come

Then they, both small and great
Began the many lands to shape
To build the mountains and rolling hills
Making rivers, brooks, and rills

But Melko still nursed his desire
That age-old consuming fire.
He filled the new world with flame
Seeking to harm, hurt, and maim
The things others saw fit to make
Burning grass and spilling lake

Until the Ainur,(Now Valar by name)
Manwe among them, greatest of fame.
Called them together for their aid
To protect the things they had made

Then Melko did draw apart
The kingdom of the world still in his heart
His purpose to crush and break
And other wills to dominate
So, withdrawn to the furthest parts
He was free to practice his own arts

While the Great Ones in the midst
Of the world, did fill it with bliss.
Taking forms of Elven grace
Only greater and fairer of face

Melko brooded all the while
Beginning to devise secret guile
To win what he could not take by force
And finally broke from the course
Of all thing good and right
As his soul fell into shades of night

A shape also, he took
One at which the whole earth shook
Dark and terrible, his form
And of all beauty was he shorn

End of my current work.

This will be that only post, unless positive interest is shown.

I am looking for a group of steady critics, so if you can't help that's fine. Work WILL go on, so don't worry about causing me to give up.

I just thought to start here, looking for critics ,before I move elsewhere. It's really hard to find poetry sites where people know Tolkien. XD



Jul 14 2013, 7:18pm

Post #2 of 5 (150 views)
This is fantastic! [In reply to] Can't Post

And I urge you to continue on your quest .... even though it *does* seem to be quite a challenging bit of work.

However, what I've read so far is very interesting and it is fascinating to see how Tolkien's legendarium can be transcibed to a different mode of writing.

Keep it up! Smile

'A Tolkienist's Perspective' Blog

Tol Eressea

Jul 15 2013, 5:06am

Post #3 of 5 (152 views)
Thanks for the interest, but [In reply to] Can't Post

What exactly do you mean by "a different mode of writing"? Color me confused on this point.

I've taken a bit of a break from this. Life, my unfinished fantasy novel, my submission to the TAS here, and the frustration of composing a cohesive timeline have all conspired against me. But, like Samwise, "I've made a promise", I will pick up work soon, and finish out the First Age at least. Composing the poetry is fun, but the timeline is killing me. It's sort of a 5 steps forward 15 steps back kind of mess! :(

I'm up to the setting of the seige of Angband, so I'll leave the timeline alone for a bit and do more poetry soon. Though the reading of the Sil and HoME is not objectionable at all!!! :)


Jul 15 2013, 6:23am

Post #4 of 5 (160 views)
Apologies [In reply to] Can't Post

if I wasn't clear ... what I meant by "different modes of writing" is the differences between poetry and prose. Tolkien's works mainly consist of prose (naturally) - however, it is interesting to see them transformed into poetry form - hence another mode of writing Wink - hope that explains it!

'A Tolkienist's Perspective' Blog

(This post was edited by Arandir on Jul 15 2013, 6:28am)

Tol Eressea

Jul 15 2013, 3:21pm

Post #5 of 5 (197 views)
Gotcha [In reply to] Can't Post

I get your meaning now.


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