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The One Ring Forums: Tolkien Topics: Fan Art:
Short story draft


May 13 2013, 7:25pm

Post #1 of 4 (602 views)
Short story draft Can't Post

Last week I suddenly became brave and posted the draft narrative on a short story/novellette I have been working on for a while. It is a tale that takes place in world of my own creation. I would love for my fellow TORn sibs to take a look and let me know what they think. Its not a manuscript or anything like that. Just something I do for enjoyment when I am having writers block on other points of the main story I am writing. I tend to to take breaks and go back and flesh out the history that gets reffered to in the main novel, thats what this is, a fleshed out version of a story referred to in another story.

Please follow the link in my footer and you will see it as the most current entry on my blog.

Thank you in advance.

just in case here's the link.

"clever hobbits to climb so high!"
Check out my writing www.jdstudios.wordpress.com
Posted newly, A short story draft, "The Last Bastion"


May 13 2013, 9:50pm

Post #2 of 4 (160 views)
I think that there is real potential there... [In reply to] Can't Post

The atmosphere of your tale is a bit cold and distant, but it is well written and has the germ of something within it. I think that you should give it some close scrutiny, determine what (if any) alterations it needs, give it another pass through the typewriter (so to speak) and submit it for publication. Even if it is rejected, you might get some helpful feedback.

'There are older and fouler things than Orcs in the deep places of the world.' - Gandalf the Grey, The Fellowship of the Ring


May 16 2013, 1:38pm

Post #3 of 4 (139 views)
thank you... [In reply to] Can't Post

very much for the kind words and for taking the time to read it. Like I said its a first draft run through of what I have begun to flesh out into a full novellette or short story, depends on the length I guess when I get it all finished. The actual story has deviated slightly now that it has been fleshed out more and the coldness has been taken out of the tone except in the parts that it is needed for effect.

I started creating this world about thirteen years ago and have been writing small stories and histories from it for that length of time all the while revising a quest novel that takes place there. The funny thing is that I have more notes and history narratives than actual novel now as I continuously am rewriting or throwing out parts of the novel because the writing is just crappy. I will probably begin a full rewrite sometime this summer with the goal of having a more quality story.

but really thanks for the kind encouragement and for reading it.

"clever hobbits to climb so high!"
Check out my writing www.jdstudios.wordpress.com
Posted newly, A short story draft, "The Last Bastion"


May 16 2013, 3:08pm

Post #4 of 4 (313 views)
I liked it [In reply to] Can't Post

I thought it was sad and beautiful. It fits well as, perhaps, an "ancient tale" within a tale I think. I would certainly read more based on this.

"Beneath the roof of sleeping leaves the dreams of trees unfold"


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