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Alassëa Eruvande
Valinor
Apr 4 2013, 6:56pm
Post #1 of 24
(1182 views)
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Scenes From The Hat
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Greetings and salivations, my dear TORnadoes, and welcome to another edition of Scenes From The Hat. I am your lovely and talented Mistress of the Hat. Today's game is inspired by everyone's favorite sling-supported mini-orc. What are some of the messages that the goblin scribe has had to scribble? For those new to the game, the object is to give the most ridiculous, improbable, pun-inducing, groan-inducing, all-of-the-above response to the question. PM me with your fabulous ideas for a future SFTH.
I am SMAUG! I kill when I wish! I am strong, strong, STRONG! My armor is like tenfold shields! My teeth like swords! My claws, spears! The shock of my tail, a thunderbolt! My wings, a hurricane! And my breath, death!
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Elwen
Lorien
Apr 4 2013, 7:08pm
Post #2 of 24
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All work and no play makes Scriby a dull orc.//
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Before kids, exercising with LOTR meant listening to the soundtrack while I ran. After kids, exercising with LOTR means having an all out dance party with the little ones to the "Break the Dam Release the River" disco mix form the Lego game.
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Ataahua
Forum Admin
/ Moderator
Apr 4 2013, 7:32pm
Post #3 of 24
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No one is to look at His Lordship directly in the goiter. /
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Celebrimbor: "Pretty rings..." Dwarves: "Pretty rings..." Men: "Pretty rings..." Sauron: "Mine's better." "Ah, how ironic, the addictive qualities of Sauron’s master weapon led to its own destruction. Which just goes to show, kids - if you want two small and noble souls to succeed on a mission of dire importance... send an evil-minded beggar with them too." - Gandalf's Diaries, final par, by Ufthak. Ataahua's stories
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NottaSackville
Valinor
Apr 4 2013, 7:35pm
Post #4 of 24
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ToDo: Have someone empty my bag //
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Happiness: money matters, but less than we think and not in the way that we think. Family is important and so are friends, while envy is toxic -- and so is excessive thinking. Beaches are optional. Trust is not. Neither is gratitude. - The Geography of Bliss by Eric Weiner as summarized by Lily Fairbairn. And a bit of the Hobbit reading thrown in never hurts. - NottaSackville
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DanielLB
Immortal
Apr 4 2013, 8:03pm
Post #5 of 24
(967 views)
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He mainly writes the Goblin King's shopping list:
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16 Extra Soft Toilet roles to prevent a burning butt Vitamin supplements for goiter Floss picks 2 x Hair growth shampoo 1 Back scratcher 24 pack of heartburn & indigestion tablets Raw meat A cattle prod to prevent riots Drool remover 15 body bags (13 Dwarf size, 1 Hobbit size, and 1 Wizard size)
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Nomad
Forum Admin
Apr 4 2013, 8:15pm
Post #7 of 24
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I bet he penned a lovely eulogy//
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elaen32
Gondor
Apr 4 2013, 9:02pm
Post #8 of 24
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"You want me to test this zip wire for the new Middle Earth theme park, your Grotesqueness?" PS- love that on the link you posted it states that this goblin is an offspring of the GG by a relationship he'd rather forget!! I'd rather not consider that further LOL!
"Beneath the roof of sleeping leaves the dreams of trees unfold"
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Brethil
Half-elven
Apr 4 2013, 11:20pm
Post #10 of 24
(936 views)
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OrcMart list: Guano dip, Cool Ranch Bat Wings, Valtrex, Proactive (Gallon jug)...
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What a gross little guy!
Hell hath no fury like a Dragon who is missing a cup.
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Riven Delve
Tol Eressea
Apr 4 2013, 11:39pm
Post #13 of 24
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"I left the night, with its remote and singing stars, and came in, to the glow of the fire, and the chair where he had been sitting, and the unstrung harp." --The Last Enchantment
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Riven Delve
Tol Eressea
Apr 4 2013, 11:51pm
Post #14 of 24
(937 views)
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"Dear Diary: I saw the most majestic hair today! I think I am in love!"
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"But alas, it can never be! The beautiful locks have escaped, and all my dreams with them!!"
"I left the night, with its remote and singing stars, and came in, to the glow of the fire, and the chair where he had been sitting, and the unstrung harp." --The Last Enchantment
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silneldor
Half-elven
Apr 4 2013, 11:52pm
Post #15 of 24
(913 views)
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Daily laundry list of one item\\
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''Sam put his ragged orc-cloak under his master's head, and covered them both with the grey robe of Lorien; and as he did so his thoughts went out to that fair land, and to the Elves, and he hoped that the cloth woven by their hands might have some virtue to keep them hidden beyond all hope in this wilderness of fear...But their luck held, and for the rest of that day they met no living or moving thing; and when night fell they vanished into the darkess of Mordor.'' - - -rotk, chapter III Faerie contains many things besides elves and fays and besides dwarfs, witches, trolls, giants or dragons; it holds the seas, the sun, the moon, the sky; and the earth, and all things that are one in it: tree and bird, water and stone, wine and bread, and ourselves, mortal men, when we are enchanted." — J.R.R. Tolkien May the grace of Manwë let us soar with eagle's wings! In the air, among the clouds in the sky Here is where the birds of Manwe fly Looking at the land, and the water that flows The true beauty of earth shows With the stars of Varda lighting my way In all the realms this is where I stay In the realm of Manwë Súlimo
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batik
Tol Eressea
Apr 4 2013, 11:57pm
Post #16 of 24
(912 views)
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Order takeout from Denny's: Bilbo's Berry Smooth.....eeeeeeeee!!//
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Riven Delve
Tol Eressea
Apr 5 2013, 1:52am
Post #17 of 24
(925 views)
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"Dear Mom, Remember how you said this job would be just as good as the one Cousin Salacious Crumb got with Jabba the Hutt?"
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"They had more in common than you thought. Pls convert your new sewing room back into my bedroom. Taking the next zipline home. Love, your little Scribbles."
"I left the night, with its remote and singing stars, and came in, to the glow of the fire, and the chair where he had been sitting, and the unstrung harp." --The Last Enchantment
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Delrond
Rohan
Apr 5 2013, 12:03pm
Post #19 of 24
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You never close your eyes any more when I kiss your lips.//
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A few harmless flakes working together can unleash an avalanche of destruction.
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Maciliel
Valinor
Apr 5 2013, 12:27pm
Post #20 of 24
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"notes for the entire production team: scriptwriters: insert a nemesis plotline around azog. give radagast a stick insect and a bunny sled. fx team: i want more orcs. orcs, orcs, orcs. lots of fast-cutting motion. i want the audience to get physically ill. everyone : i want any suggestions you have about how to make the dwarves ridiculous. belching, rude behavior, whatever you can come up with. fran : tell peter he's not getting released from the rotating spit until i get my angry hug scene." cheers -- .
aka. fili orc-enshield +++++++++++++++++++ the scene, as i understand it, is exceptionally well-written. fili (in sort of a callback to the scene with the eagles), calls out "thorRIIIIIIN!!!" just as he sees the pale orc veer in for the kill. he picks up the severed arm of an orc which is lying on the ground, swings it up in desperation, effectively blocking the pale orc's blow. and thus, forever after, fili is known as "fili orc-enshield." this earns him deep respect from his hard-to-please uncle. as well as a hug. kili wipes his boots on the pale orc's glory box. -- maciliel
(This post was edited by Maciliel on Apr 5 2013, 12:32pm)
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sador
Half-elven
Apr 5 2013, 12:46pm
Post #21 of 24
(876 views)
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Friday, 15:45 - call the Hat-Mistress! //
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SirDennisC
Half-elven
Apr 5 2013, 4:07pm
Post #22 of 24
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"Safety bulletin 33 should read: 'Harnesses are *not* optional on bridges and platforms.'" //
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Brethil
Half-elven
Apr 5 2013, 4:32pm
Post #23 of 24
(883 views)
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Scribey Goblin is very happy with his new book. (THAT explains a lot.........!)
Hell hath no fury like a Dragon who is missing a cup.
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Aunt Dora Baggins
Immortal
Apr 9 2013, 3:09am
Post #24 of 24
(844 views)
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A secret job application to Gringotts //
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "For DORA BAGGINS in memory of a LONG correspondence, with love from Bilbo; on a large wastebasket. Dora was Drogo's sister, and the eldest surviving female relative of Bilbo and Frodo; she was ninety-nine, and had written reams of good advice for more than half a century." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "A Chance Meeting at Rivendell" and other stories leleni at hotmail dot com ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
(This post was edited by Aunt Dora Baggins on Apr 9 2013, 3:17am)
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