Our Sponsor Sideshow Collectibles Send us News
Lord of the Rings Tolkien
Search Tolkien
Lord of The RingsTheOneRing.net - Forged By And For Fans Of JRR Tolkien
Lord of The Rings Serving Middle-Earth Since The First Age

Lord of the Rings Movie News - J.R.R. Tolkien
Do you enjoy the 100% volunteer, not for profit services of TheOneRing.net?
Consider a donation!

  Main Index   Search Posts   Who's Online   Log in
The One Ring Forums: Tolkien Topics: Main:
The Arkenstone, a Bob Dylan song parody

Ruxendil_Thoorg
Grey Havens


Mar 23 2013, 4:15pm

Post #1 of 20 (220 views)
Shortcut
The Arkenstone, a Bob Dylan song parody Can't Post

THE ARKENSTONE

Once upon a time you lived so fine,
Sure liked to recline in your prime, didn’t you?
Dwarves a-callin’ said “Is this all,
Is this the ball?”
You thought, “What’s this gall?” Kiddin’ you?
You used to lounge about,
No adventures, only hangin’ out.
Now clean hankies not allowed,
Now you don’t seem so proud
About having to be scrounging your next meal.

How does it feel?
How does it feel
So far beyond your home
In the complete unknown,
Like a rolling stone?

O! He’s heir to the finest realm all right,
Mount Lonely, where the King, his grandpa, used to get
Juiced in it,
Nobody ever taught Thorin how to flee out on his feet
And soon he found he’d shortly have to get
Used to it.
He’s sworn revenge, to never compromise,
Since Smaug’s victory laugh, and now you realize,
He’s not selling any alibis,
As you stare into the bright gloom of those eyes
That say, “Do you want to make a deal?”

How does it feel?
How does it feel
No comforts of your own,
No protection of home,
In the complete unknown,
Like a rolling stone?

O! You ever see a stone, like a globe light-shone
With a moonlight woven of frosty glowin’ stars, that
Bewitches you?
Thorin understood that it ain’t no good,
You shouldn’t let trinkets like the Arkenstone get your
Kicks for you.
It used to ride on a throne, ‘oer where grandpa sat,
He carried in his heart a greed that sized so fat,
Ain’t it hard when you discover that
He really wasn’t where it’s at,
After Smaug took from him everything it could steal?

How does it feel?
How does it feel
To have ya’ on your own,
Dispossessed from home
Like a complete unknown,
Without the Arkenstone?

O! Thorin at the gates, before the folk he hates,
They’re all blaming, claiming and they
Want their share.
You fingered a precious “gift”
Now you’d better take your coat and Ring,
Time to do what’s fair,
You used to be so enthused
With the Heir all in rags and the language that he used.
Go from him now, he’s lost in his greed-sick blues.
When he’s got nothing, he’s got nothing to lose,
You’re invisible now, you’ve got a secret to conceal.

How does it feel?
O, how does it feel
To be on your own
With no friends, alone,
All certainty unknown,
With the Arkenstone?

This was a parody of
Like a Rolling Stone, the song by Bob Dylan
,
inspired mainly by JRR Tolkien’s The Hobbit and in part by the Erebor prologue in The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey (2012) (Dir. Peter Jackson)

A bag is like a hole that you can carry with you.

http://newboards.theonering.net/...forum_view_expanded;


Otaku-sempai
Half-elven


Mar 23 2013, 7:56pm

Post #2 of 20 (108 views)
Shortcut
Fine, fine work! [In reply to] Can't Post

You've done it again, Ruxendil!

In appreciation, let me give you a friendly warning: If you happen to come across a new film called InAPPropriate Comedy, starring Lindsey Lohan and directed by "the gentleman from the ShamWow commercials", steer well clear of it. It may well be the worst movie of the year (if not decade) and judging from this review, even copious amounts of alcohol may not be able to overcome its deficiencies.

'There are older and fouler things than Orcs in the deep places of the world.' - Gandalf the Grey, The Fellowship of the Ring


Ruxendil_Thoorg
Grey Havens


Mar 23 2013, 8:36pm

Post #3 of 20 (107 views)
Shortcut
Thanks Sempai! [In reply to] Can't Post

for the kind compliment and the warning, which I assure you is well taken! Cool. Very well taken indeed! CrazyCoolLaugh

A bag is like a hole that you can carry with you.

http://newboards.theonering.net/...forum_view_expanded;


zarabia
Grey Havens


Mar 24 2013, 2:08am

Post #4 of 20 (89 views)
Shortcut
Brilliant!! :) // [In reply to] Can't Post

 

"The question isn't where, Constable, but when." - Inspector Spacetime


Brethil
Half-elven


Mar 24 2013, 2:32am

Post #5 of 20 (84 views)
Shortcut
***applause*** [In reply to] Can't Post

You do bring it every time, R-T!!!!

Hell hath no fury like a Dragon who is missing a cup.


Ruxendil_Thoorg
Grey Havens


Mar 24 2013, 3:35am

Post #6 of 20 (83 views)
Shortcut
*Bow* [In reply to] Can't Post

Thank you, you are most kind Smile

A bag is like a hole that you can carry with you.

http://newboards.theonering.net/...forum_view_expanded;


Ruxendil_Thoorg
Grey Havens


Mar 24 2013, 3:40am

Post #7 of 20 (80 views)
Shortcut
Thanks zarabia, too kind! :-) // [In reply to] Can't Post

 

A bag is like a hole that you can carry with you.

http://newboards.theonering.net/...forum_view_expanded;


BoromirOfWinterfell
Rohan


Mar 24 2013, 6:41am

Post #8 of 20 (103 views)
Shortcut
Another excellent parody, Ruxendil! [In reply to] Can't Post

I don't know if you know the song, but if you were ever to make a parody of "Big Iron" by Marty Robbins, I would be forever in your debt.

"Eala Earendel engla beorhtast
ofer middangeard monnum sended."

"You think you world is safe? It is an illusion. A comforting lie told to protect you. Enjoy these final moments of peace. For I have returned to have my vengeance. So, shall we begin? " - John Harrison/Khan/Sherlock/Smaug (Star Trek: Into Darkness)


Ruxendil_Thoorg
Grey Havens


Mar 24 2013, 12:10pm

Post #9 of 20 (75 views)
Shortcut
Humble thanks BoWF! [In reply to] Can't Post

I do confess, that title and artist don't ring a bell, but I'll look for it and will see how it might be Tolkienified. Thanks again dear BoromirSmile

A bag is like a hole that you can carry with you.

http://newboards.theonering.net/...forum_view_expanded;


Ruxendil_Thoorg
Grey Havens


Mar 24 2013, 2:09pm

Post #10 of 20 (81 views)
Shortcut
BIG SECRET, a cowboy song parody by your request [In reply to] Can't Post

OK Boromir this is for you:


BIG SECRET


In the Mannish town of Bree, there walked a foursome one dark night,
Hardly spoke to folks around them, didn’t want to draw a sight.
Watchman dared to ask their business, none of four dared make a slip,
For the four of them were Hobbits with a secret in their grip,
A secret in their grip.

It was dusky in the evening when they trudged into the town.
They came trekking from the west side slowly lookin’ all around.
They were living rough and running, came the whisper from each lip,
And they’d come to do some business with a secret in their grip,
A secret in their grip.

By that time there floated rumors of some strange folk, it was said,
Many men that might have seen them had gone missing, likely dead,
They were vicious, hooded killers and they numbered five and four,
And the notches on their Morgul blades would number countless more,
Would number countless more.

Now the Hobbits, some were talking, plainly drunk to folks around,
While a hooded, watchful ranger in the corner wore a frown.
Was he here to help the Nazgul? It could not be surely said.
So the Hobbits asked for Gandalf, with the tall hat on his head,
A tall hat on his head.

Wasn’t long before the story was relayed to Hobbits four,
That the wizard hadn’t shown his face nor walked in through the door.
All the Hobbits sat and waited nervously to meet their friend,
With the hooded ranger watching, with a big iron on his hip,
Big iron on his hip.

The evening stretched so slowly, past the time for them to meet.
It was sometime past eleven when the strange folk came so fleet.
Folks were huddled in their blankets, everybody held their breath.
They knew the four wee Hobbits were about to meet their death,
About to meet their death

Naught but linen sheets between them when they stopped to make their play,
And the swiftness of the ranger is still talked about today.
Hobbits four were switched with cushions, fore those shapes were stabbed and ripped,
Thus the ranger helped the Hobbits keep the secret in their grip,
The secret in their grip

It was over by the morning when the folks did come around,
In the room for four wee Hobbits, linen tatters did abound.
Oh the strange folk might have caught them but they made a big ol’ slip,
When they tried to match the ranger with the big iron on his hip,
Big iron on his hip.


By request of Boromir of Winterfell, this was a parody of http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lL7PtiRQCFs Big Iron, the cowboy song by Marty Robbins. Thanks BoWF that was fun!

A bag is like a hole that you can carry with you.

http://newboards.theonering.net/...forum_view_expanded;


Kirly
Lorien


Mar 24 2013, 4:52pm

Post #11 of 20 (72 views)
Shortcut
That's really nice! [In reply to] Can't Post

 

My avatar photo is Lake Tekapo in New Zealand's South Island. Taken by me in 2004 on a Red Carpet Tours LOTR Movie Location Tour. 'Twas the Vacation of a Lifetime!

pictures taken while on the tour are here:
https://picasaweb.google.com/Kirly7/LOTRNewZealandTour#


Ruxendil_Thoorg
Grey Havens


Mar 24 2013, 6:35pm

Post #12 of 20 (67 views)
Shortcut
Thanks Kirly, glad you thought so :-) // [In reply to] Can't Post

 

A bag is like a hole that you can carry with you.

http://newboards.theonering.net/...forum_view_expanded;


BoromirOfWinterfell
Rohan


Mar 25 2013, 6:25am

Post #13 of 20 (80 views)
Shortcut
I can't thank you enough! [In reply to] Can't Post

You have some serious lyrical talents, Ruxendil. This is excellent! Managing it in such a short time is awesome! Smile

"Eala Earendel engla beorhtast
ofer middangeard monnum sended."

"You think you world is safe? It is an illusion. A comforting lie told to protect you. Enjoy these final moments of peace. For I have returned to have my vengeance. So, shall we begin? " - John Harrison/Khan/Sherlock/Smaug (Star Trek: Into Darkness)


grammaboodawg
Immortal


Mar 25 2013, 9:21am

Post #14 of 20 (59 views)
Shortcut
Wow... heavy, man... [In reply to] Can't Post

This is one of the most emotional and evocative parodies you've done, imho, RT. Wow. It's a perfect song to choose for the mood of these events, and hauntingly emotional lyrics. Wonderful! It has settled there in my mind. Well done!

wow...


3rd draft of TH:AUJ Geeky Observation List - updated for DVD release!!!



sample

I'm SO HAPPY these new films take me back to that magical world!!



TIME Google Calendar
TORn's Geeky Observations Lists (updated soon)


Ruxendil_Thoorg
Grey Havens


Mar 25 2013, 5:09pm

Post #15 of 20 (59 views)
Shortcut
Thanks so much gramma :-) [In reply to] Can't Post

 So glad you saw it the way you did, gramma. Thanks for sharing that and for supporting me with your feedback, which truly means a lot. Smile.

Dylan gets the credit for the power of his songwriting here. I was struck by how closely his song reflected what Bilbo and Thorin were experiencing. I just tweaked it a little, Wink. Thanks again gramma Smile

A bag is like a hole that you can carry with you.

http://newboards.theonering.net/...forum_view_expanded;


Ruxendil_Thoorg
Grey Havens


Mar 25 2013, 5:26pm

Post #16 of 20 (52 views)
Shortcut
I'm glad you liked it Boromir :-) [In reply to] Can't Post

I can hardly believe I'd never known that wonderful song. It sounds like a classic, thanks for introducing me to it. It was great fun Tolkienifying it for you. Smile

I did notice after posting that I missed a rhyme. Blush So, I would like to fix that by changing "..a big iron on his hip/With a big iron on his hip" to "...by his hand/With a big iron by his hand" (after the line that ends with "friend"). Cool

You're very welcome and thanks for the kind words, BoWF. I'm so glad you enjoyed. Smile. I don't know if it makes me a talented lyricist, when all I really did was tweak Marty Robbins' lyrics, but thanks all the same Smile

A bag is like a hole that you can carry with you.

http://newboards.theonering.net/...forum_view_expanded;


Ziggy Stardust
Gondor


Mar 26 2013, 12:11am

Post #17 of 20 (53 views)
Shortcut
Loved it! [In reply to] Can't Post

It really fit well with the theme of The Hobbit, and it's a great song!


Ruxendil_Thoorg
Grey Havens


Mar 26 2013, 3:14am

Post #18 of 20 (61 views)
Shortcut
Thanks ZS! [In reply to] Can't Post

It really does fit, right? In truth, I discovered the similarity quite by happy accident. I checked the lyrics for a parody only because "like a rolling stone" had the same meter as "with the Arkenstone". It was amazing to me upon reading it, it even had the words "Lonely" (as a proper noun, no less) and "invisible" in it. And other parts that fit word for word. I was thrilled to find this uncannily applicable song for TH.

I'm glad you thought so too. Your compliment and support means a lot, thanks! And yes, its a great song by Dylan. I wonder how Dylan would feel about this.

A bag is like a hole that you can carry with you.

http://newboards.theonering.net/...forum_view_expanded;


BoromirOfWinterfell
Rohan


Mar 26 2013, 7:08am

Post #19 of 20 (49 views)
Shortcut
The ability to tweak lyrics like that [In reply to] Can't Post

is definitely a gift - sure sign of real lyrical talent. Don't forget the impeccable ability of changing the lyrics and fitting them in the perfect LotR/TH situation.

"Eala Earendel engla beorhtast
ofer middangeard monnum sended."

"You think you world is safe? It is an illusion. A comforting lie told to protect you. Enjoy these final moments of peace. For I have returned to have my vengeance. So, shall we begin? " - John Harrison/Khan/Sherlock/Smaug (Star Trek: Into Darkness)


Ruxendil_Thoorg
Grey Havens


Mar 26 2013, 11:32am

Post #20 of 20 (59 views)
Shortcut
*Big smile* [In reply to] Can't Post

Truly and warmly, thank you Boromir. I do enjoy trying. SmileSmile.

A bag is like a hole that you can carry with you.

http://newboards.theonering.net/...forum_view_expanded;

 
 

Search for (options) Powered by Gossamer Forum v.1.2.3

home | advertising | contact us | back to top | search news | join list | Content Rating

This site is maintained and updated by fans of The Lord of the Rings, and is in no way affiliated with Tolkien Enterprises or the Tolkien Estate. We in no way claim the artwork displayed to be our own. Copyrights and trademarks for the books, films, articles, and other promotional materials are held by their respective owners and their use is allowed under the fair use clause of the Copyright Law. Design and original photography however are copyright © 1999-2012 TheOneRing.net. Binary hosting provided by Nexcess.net

Do not follow this link, or your host will be blocked from this site. This is a spider trap.