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SAST Quiz #8
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Nira
Lorien


Mar 20 2013, 4:40am

Post #26 of 51 (294 views)
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Indeed. Ordering other men to ride ponies takes it to a whole new level. [In reply to] Can't Post

While they both have perfect hair, the transportation of choice tells all.
Thanks! Smile

"Why, to think of it, we're in the same tale still! It's going on. Don't the great tales never end?" -Samwise

(This post was edited by Nira on Mar 20 2013, 4:44am)


Silverlode
Forum Admin / Moderator


Mar 20 2013, 8:09am

Post #27 of 51 (339 views)
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*raises hand* Ooh! Ooh! I know! Pick me! [In reply to] Can't Post

1. What is the first warning that a dragon attack on Esgaroth is imminent?

A hot wind - which the people of Laketown didn't really pay attention to because they were so used to the Master's speeches that most of them didn't even notice hot air anymore, followed by a bright light in the North which turned the river golden and which they took as a good omen....basically, the people of Laketown were really, really complacent and sheeplike and not very bright.


2. From which famous ancestor is Bard descended?

Um.....um....the name Girion is floating up out of my subconscious, so I'll go with that. Final answer.


3. How does Bard find out about Smaug’s weak spot?

The thrush points it out to him. It's the classic case of "A little bird told me."


4. Where does Smaug fall after he is struck down by Bard?

Down. Because of gravity.

....Oh, you wanted more specifics? He takes out part of the bridge to the shore and some houses, I think.


5. Who comes first to the aid of the people of Esgaroth, after the town is destroyed by Smaug?

Thranduil. And it's not like Thorin isn't going to be extra bitter about that, oh no, not at all! Ignoring the dwarves but helping the humans....wait.... it's the hair, isn't it? The humans don't seem to wash much, and Thranduil's got too much sense of self-preservation to complain too loudly about Saruman's 'do, but he's jealous as anything about the Dwarven Royal Hair. This explains everything about the Elf/Dwarf feud. IT ALL MAKES SENSE NOW.

Scene: Thranduil's bedchamber, night. Many years ago.

Thranduil approaches a basin on an ornate stand. He pours water into it and peers into the depths. When the image clears, he speaks.

"Mirror, mirror, just sitting there
Who has Middle-earth's most glorious hair?"


There is a pause, and then the mirror replies:

"Thranduil's hair so golden bright
falls like shafts of fair sunlight
But locks of far surpassing grace
wave majestically 'round Thorin's face."


Flying into a rage, Thranduil begins to plot how he can remove this menace to his own supreme gorgeousness. He crafts a plan of great cunning and subtlety but, alas, he never gets to carry it out. When he arrives at Erebor, he finds that Smaug is there before him. Briefly, he allows himself to hope that Thorin has caught a little dragon flame and his glorious hair will at least be singed, but no....with a disappointed sigh, he turns sadly away and returns home to brood.

Scene: Thranduil's throne room, present day. Thranduil is on his throne, scowling. Galion the butler stands guiltily before him.

Thranduil: Do you now understand what you have done? At long last, I had this dwarf in my power. I threw him in my dungeons. I separated him from his companions so they could hold no braiding parties. I gave him no comb to remove the spider webs from his hair and beard! I could deny him shampoo and conditioner indefinitely! At last my dream was to become reality! How could you allow him to escape??

Galion cowers. Legolas steps forward.

Legolas: Father, he was heading straight into the fire-breathing dragon's lair. He'll never survive.

Thranduil: You're only saying that because no one ever has. It is not enough to suppose. I need to know. Captain of the Guard, report!

Tauriel: My lord, our river elves have returned from Laketown. They say the dwarves were welcomed with open arms by the Men and they've given them new clothes, equipment, and ponies and sent them off toward Erebor.

Thranduil, with bitterness: They gave them bubble baths and complimentary toiletries too, I suppose. Captain, what is the velocity of a hairy dwarf?

Tauriel: Braided or unbraided, my lord?

Thranduil, with sudden decision: Captain of the Guard, give orders to my army to prepare to march in the morning. Legolas, you will lead our forces to the Lonely Mountain and if the dragon hasn't had the good sense to singe every hair off that dwarf's head, you will lay seige to the Mountain until his hair goes gray or falls out, whichever comes sooner. It will give you something to do.

Legolas: As you wish. We march South at sunrise!

Thranduil, after a thoughtful pause: .....On second thoughts, I'll come with you as far as Laketown and see you off. You can follow the River upstream to the Mountain from there. Can't miss it.

*fade out*



Silverlode






(This post was edited by Silverlode on Mar 20 2013, 8:18am)


Silverlode
Forum Admin / Moderator


Mar 20 2013, 8:29am

Post #28 of 51 (293 views)
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Great minds think alike, Angharad! [In reply to] Can't Post

I post my answers and go back to read everyone else's, only to find I'm not being as original as I thought! Laugh

Silverlode






Roheryn
Grey Havens

Mar 20 2013, 9:15am

Post #29 of 51 (285 views)
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Well, you know [In reply to] Can't Post

what they say about men and big cars...and compensating...logically the corollary is true, right? Men and small cars, no compensation required? So (you can see where this is headed already), in Middle-earth we don't have cars but beasts -- and good lord, that was one heck of a huge elky beast Thranduil was riding (look at the size of that rack [of antlers!]). Massive compensation there. But Thorin -- he rides a pony! 'Nuff said. Angelic


Roheryn
Grey Havens

Mar 20 2013, 9:23am

Post #30 of 51 (282 views)
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*rolls eyes* [In reply to] Can't Post

You and Mr. Ro. He's taught that one to our boys, who delight in singing it. He's also taught them "Jingle Bells, Batman Smells", and a Yankee Doodle take-off that involves Colonel Sanders and which is entirely inappropriate for these boards. And if that's not enough, he's taken nearly every song I ever enjoyed singing and used his parody skills to turn them into poop anthems. Poop on the Range, Good King Poopielas, We Wish You a Poopy Christmas, and so many more. *rolls eyes again* You men! I suppose you'll tell me you find these funny too?

Wink


dernwyn
Forum Admin / Moderator


Mar 20 2013, 10:10am

Post #31 of 51 (296 views)
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*wipes breakfast tea off screen* Bwahahahaha! [In reply to] Can't Post

"Braided or unbraided"? "We march South..."?

Silverlode, this is a work of art! Laugh


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I desired dragons with a profound desire"






elaen32
Gondor

Mar 20 2013, 10:17am

Post #32 of 51 (301 views)
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Excellent! [In reply to] Can't Post

This is great and should be in DOS prologue lol!! Maybe Legolas is not so wrong in going south , if he's following Thorin whose.own sense of direction leaves much to be desired!

"Beneath the roof of sleeping leaves the dreams of trees unfold"


Angharad73
Rohan


Mar 20 2013, 10:44am

Post #33 of 51 (278 views)
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It's the Dwarves... [In reply to] Can't Post

They always make me think of Snow White for some reason Tongue

Your rhymes are far better though. I couldn't write anything even vaguely resembling a poem to save my life... Crazy


Aragalen the Green
Gondor


Mar 20 2013, 2:18pm

Post #34 of 51 (403 views)
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These are harder! [In reply to] Can't Post

Wracking brains...Tongue

1. What is the first warning that a dragon attack on Esgaroth is imminent? A light in the sky coming from the direction of the Mountain.

2. From which famous ancestor is Bard descended? Girion, Lord of Dale

3. How does Bard find out about Smaug’s weak spot? The Thrush tells Bard about Bilbo's discovery of the bare patch in the hollow of Smaug's chest.

4. Where does Smaug fall after he is struck down by Bard? I love this part! Full onto the town he fell, smashing it to smithereens!

5. Who comes first to the aid of the people of Esgaroth, after the town is destroyed by Smaug? The Wood Elves.


Excelsior!



'"Never laugh at live dragons, Bilbo you fool!" he said to himself, and it became a favourite saying of his later, and passed into a proverb.'


Eowyn3
Rivendell

Mar 20 2013, 3:26pm

Post #35 of 51 (278 views)
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SAST Quiz #8 [In reply to] Can't Post

1. There was a glowing light above the mountain.
2. The original master of Dale (Darth Vader because he is Bard's father.)
3. He is told by the thrush
4. Into the lake
5. The wood elves

" He has just as much reason to go to war as you do. Why can he not fight for those he loves?"


Ataahua
Superuser / Moderator


Mar 20 2013, 6:33pm

Post #36 of 51 (263 views)
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Superb. Just, superb. / [In reply to] Can't Post

 

Celebrimbor: "Pretty rings..."
Dwarves: "Pretty rings..."
Men: "Pretty rings..."
Sauron: "Mine's better."

"Ah, how ironic, the addictive qualities of Sauron’s master weapon led to its own destruction. Which just goes to show, kids - if you want two small and noble souls to succeed on a mission of dire importance... send an evil-minded beggar with them too." - Gandalf's Diaries, final par, by Ufthak.


Ataahua's stories


grammaboodawg
Immortal


Mar 20 2013, 11:23pm

Post #37 of 51 (266 views)
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Here we go! [In reply to] Can't Post

1. What is the first warning that a dragon attack on Esgaroth is imminent?
There's not a bottle of ketsup to be found anywhere!

2. From which famous ancestor is Bard descended?
He's so serious... I'd say cross-reference Thorin's records!


3. How does Bard find out about Smaug’s weak spot?
A little birdie told him. One with snail-breath.


4. Where does Smaug fall after he is struck down by Bard?
Swan dives into the lake.


5. Who comes first to the aid of the people of Esgaroth, after the town is destroyed by Smaug?
Thanduil and Company... and I think they brought a Wizard with them :)

These are so awesome, Ro! Thank you BIG TIME!



Second draft of TH:AUJ Geeky Observation List - updated list coming soon



sample

I'm SO HAPPY these new films take me back to that magical world!!



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TORn's Geeky Observations Lists (updated soon)


sador
Half-elven


Mar 21 2013, 8:16am

Post #38 of 51 (250 views)
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Came nigh to a-spoiling me pantaloons! // [In reply to] Can't Post

 


Rosie-with-the-ribbons
Forum Admin / Moderator


Mar 21 2013, 5:20pm

Post #39 of 51 (249 views)
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Answers [In reply to] Can't Post

Just remembered I forgot to play last week Frown. Too busy. But I'm back...

1. Lights! Smaug wasn't one for traveling in the dark. The evening before he had already been playing around the mountain with his lights. And now he came flying in, lighting his way. And thus showing he was coming (note to self, us stealth mode, not smaug-mode).

2. He also came from across the water. He was descended from Girion, Lord of Dale.

3. Never tell a secret to a thrush, they gossip!

4. Down... into the lake. Where his jewels still can be seen in the deep water.

5. The woodelves from Mirkwood.



Arandiel
Grey Havens

Mar 21 2013, 6:11pm

Post #40 of 51 (245 views)
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My attempt at answers [In reply to] Can't Post

I don't think I stand a chance this week. But, hey, it's fun!

1.
What is the first warning that a dragon attack on Esgaroth is imminent?
Air raid sirens. Or the girlfriend approaches the ominous door handle. Or all the little birdies go eerily silent. Cue Hitch's shrieking strings.

2. From which famous ancestor is Bard descended?
Hmm... Bard the Bowman... son of Carnak the Magnificent.

3. How does Bard find out about Smaug’s weak spot?
He has him tailed by a hard-bitten gumshoe, name of Spade, Sam Spade.

4. Where does Smaug fall after he is struck down by Bard?
In the lowland so low. aka the Drink. aka Davy Jones' Locker - freshwater edition. Don't tell Orlando!

5. Who comes first to the aid of the people of Esgaroth, after the town is destroyed by Smaug?
Papa Smurf, the Sta-Puft Marshmallow Man, and Optimus Prime.




Walk to Rivendell: There and Back Again Challenge - traveling through Middle Earth with thirteen rowdy Dwarves, one grumpy Wizard, and a beleaguered Hobbit

Join us, Thursdays on Main!


kiwifan
Rohan

Mar 22 2013, 12:29am

Post #41 of 51 (236 views)
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I'm not sure this falls into the three day period [In reply to] Can't Post

but as I just re-read TH over the weekend, I should know the answers (if not, you can hurl conkers at me).

1. The first warning sign of an attack by Smaug on Esgaroth is a lot of light to the north where Erebor lies, on account of which some naive Laketowners think the river is running with gold as foretold in the prophecy.

2. Bard is a descendant of Girion, Lord of Dale (I think that was his title).

3. The thrush tells him, having overheard Bilbo telling the Dwarves of the one spot on Smaug's chest that is not encrusted with jewels..

4. Smaug crashes right down on Esgaroth, destroying a large part of the town.

5. The Elvenking and some of his Woodelves (in the book, he's never called Thranduil, is he?)

Like I said, I just re-read the book (due to suffering from TDS but book-Thorin doesn't quite do it for me Unsure)

'Goodness gracious, you really are a messie!' 'Oh no, I'm not, these are all just mathoms...'


kiwifan
Rohan

Mar 22 2013, 12:54am

Post #42 of 51 (240 views)
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This is glorious, Silverlode! [In reply to] Can't Post

I laughed so hard! Thank you so much!

'Goodness gracious, you really are a messie!' 'Oh no, I'm not, these are all just mathoms...'


Bellerock
Rivendell

Mar 22 2013, 12:56am

Post #43 of 51 (230 views)
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Beowulf [In reply to] Can't Post

I've been reading Beowulf this week. Maybe it will help.

1. What was the first warning of the dragon? "The smooth evil dragon swims through the gloom enfolded in flame; The folk of that country hold him in dread." (They see a light in the sky.)

2. Who was Bard's famous ancestor? "We have heard of the thriving of the throne of Denmark, how the folk-kings flourished in former days." (Hmm. That's not really much help. So I'll say Girion, Lord of Dale.)

3. How does Bard find out about Smaug's weak spot? Okay, my analogy is breaking down. I'm sure it was a thrush who told him.

4. Where does Smaug fall when he dies? "Let the waves take him and the flood engulf the guardian of treasures." (Into the Long Lake?)

5. Who first comes to help? "The band of picked companions did not come to stand about him . . . They escaped to the woods." (The woods eh? It must have been the wood elves who came to help.)


Thanks, Roheryn. This was fun

(Quotations from Beowulf translated by Michael Alexander and published by Penguin Books in 1973)


kiwifan
Rohan

Mar 22 2013, 12:58am

Post #44 of 51 (242 views)
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This is the first quiz I've read and I only just realised that the answers should be funny [In reply to] Can't Post

as well as correct. Or both? Like Gollum saying 'string --- or nothing'? Or would that not qualify? (Perhaps it wasn't string anyway). Anyway, I shouldn't have just given straight answers, I know that now. Trouble is, I'm not half as inspired as pretty much everyone else who participated --- so funny!

Will try harder next week...Evil


Silverlode
Forum Admin / Moderator


Mar 22 2013, 3:39am

Post #45 of 51 (244 views)
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The SAST tradition [In reply to] Can't Post

is as follows:

You give the true answer if you can. You get points for correct answers, funny or not.

If you get a good score, you get Tolkien trivia bragging rights. If you get 3 or fewer answers correct, you are entitled to a seat on the Mediocrity Bench - which is usually where the party is happening anyway.

Funny answers get awarded "Invisible Extra Credit" which is often prized above real points because it's harder to be funny than right. Hence, even people who have no idea what the right answer is can join the quiz if they can invent some clever nonsense.

If you can be right and funny, then you get both real points and IEC, which is the best of both worlds. Cool

Silverlode






Roheryn
Grey Havens

Mar 22 2013, 5:06am

Post #46 of 51 (217 views)
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***QUIZ NOW CLOSED*** [In reply to] Can't Post

Let's see if I can get Answers & Results posted earlier than usual! Lots of company on the Mediocrity Bench this week, I suspect... Wink


Roheryn
Grey Havens

Mar 22 2013, 5:15am

Post #47 of 51 (255 views)
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What Silverlode said! [In reply to] Can't Post

There's certainly no requirement whatsoever to be funny! Correct answers earn one point each, and you get massive bragging rights if you get a perfect score.

Check out the housekeeping bit at the bottom of the first quiz here for a bit more info:

http://newboards.theonering.net/...0Quiz%20%231;#567786

And by the way, kiwifan, welcome to the quizzes. Smile


Roheryn
Grey Havens

Mar 22 2013, 10:11am

Post #48 of 51 (248 views)
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SAST QUIZ #8: ANSWERS & RESULTS: Party on the Mediocrity Bench! [In reply to] Can't Post

*Ro walks in holding a very large Round Tuit*

I’m actually posting these on time! Thought I’d give everyone plenty of time to party on the Mediocrity Bench before next week’s quiz. There’s plenty of company to be had on the Bench this week: average score was about a 3.1. Next week’s quiz will be easier…if I’m sufficiently bribed…and I suspect you have an inkling what sort of thing (or rather what sort of who) makes the best bribe. Wink Thanks to everyone who participated this week, and as always, let me know if you have any queries or comments! Party on, y'all.


Answers

1. What is the first warning that a dragon attack on Esgaroth is imminent?

“Now [the Lonely Mountain] was lost and gone, blotted in the dark…. Suddenly it flickered back to view; a brief glow touched it and faded.” … “Then suddenly a great light appeared in the low place in the hills and the northern end of the lake turned golden.”

2. From which famous ancestor is Bard descended?

“He was a descendant in long line of Girion, lord of Dale…”

3. How does Bard find out about Smaug’s weak spot?

“Suddenly out of the dark something fluttered to his shoulder. He started – but it was only an old thrush. Unafraid it perched by his ear and it brought him news…. ‘Wait! Wait!’ it said to him. ‘The moon is rising. Look for the hollow of the left breast as he flies and turns above you!’”

4. Where does Smaug fall after he is struck down by Bard?

Full on the town he fell. His last throes splintered it to sparks and gledes.”

[Needed to indicate he fell on the town, not just into the water!]

5. Who comes first to the aid of the people of Esgaroth, after the town is destroyed by Smaug?

“But the [Elven]king, when he received the prayers of Bard, had pity, for he was the lord of a good and kindly people, so turning his march, which had at first been direct towards the Mountain, he hastened now down the river to the Long Lake. … Only five days after the death of the dragon they came upon the shores…”


Results

5 Points
Aragalen the Green
Elberbeth
kiwifan
sador
Silverlode

4 Points
Angharad73
Ataahua
Bellerock
Brethil
dernwyn
Elessar
Rosie-with-the-ribbons
SirDennisC
The Prancing Pony

3 Points
batik
elaen32
Eowyn3
GwaihirWindLord
Ziggy Stardust

2 Points
entmaiden
grammaboodawg
Nira
NottaSackville

1 Point
Arwen's Daughter

0 Points (but plenty of IEC)
Arandiel
Eruwestial37
ryouko


Invisible Extra Credit (you lot outdid yourselves this week – great answers!) to: Arandiel; Arwen's Daughter; Ataahua; Bellerock; Brethil; dernwyn (ROFL at your #2!); elaen32; Eowyn3; Eruwestial37; grammaboodawg; Nira; NottaSackville; Rosie-with-the-ribbons; ryouko; sador; SirDennisC

Double IEC to Angharad73 for once again managing to work Thorin’s hair into every answer (no mean feat, since Thorin’s not even in this chapter), and to Silverlode for her brilliant, hilarious script. ROFL, both of you! Well done. LaughLaughLaugh


Arwen's daughter
Half-elven


Mar 23 2013, 1:01am

Post #49 of 51 (214 views)
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I'm in a class by myself! [In reply to] Can't Post

I always knew I was special. Or maybe I just really need to reread The Hobbit!



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SirDennisC
Half-elven


Mar 23 2013, 1:22am

Post #50 of 51 (215 views)
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Here's to outliers AD -- [In reply to] Can't Post

This is my best score so far, helped partially by a recent RR discussion, and partially by a generous Quizmistress (thanks Ro for reading my first answer perceptively).

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