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The One Ring Forums: Off Topic: The Pollantir:
What social networking sites do you use?
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Poll: What social networking sites do you use?
View Results (86 votes)


Nov 17 2012, 12:33pm

Post #1 of 31 (1372 views)
What social networking sites do you use? Can't Post

I mean, actively use. I have an account with a lot of social networking sites but only actively use a few of them.

Facebook and Tumblr are the main two I use. I've had a livejournal since 2004, but since Facebook got big, I don't use it much anymore (even though I prefer it!).


Nov 17 2012, 1:32pm

Post #2 of 31 (608 views)
FB & Tumblr [In reply to] Can't Post

I've had fb since 2008...was probably a little too addicted to it at first. These days it's main function is staying in touch with friends I don't see often, that's it. I started using tumblr back in May of this year, and I'm absolutely loving it! It's a great outlet, and I've met some great friends through it over the last 7 months! Haven't touched myspace in about 6 years, and I've never used any of the others.


Nov 17 2012, 1:47pm

Post #3 of 31 (632 views)
Only Facebook [In reply to] Can't Post

And all I use it for is to play scrabble! I'm not interested in what people are having for dinner, or what they're watching on TV. And I'm not sure why people feel the need to post about it.


Nov 17 2012, 2:49pm

Post #4 of 31 (648 views)
Me too [In reply to] Can't Post

I used to ignore facebook and later on hesitated creating an account... but now, after 1 year of use,I believe it can be helpful and entertaining.


Nov 17 2012, 5:34pm

Post #5 of 31 (586 views)
Facebook and one "other" [In reply to] Can't Post

Back in 2005 a group of people who met here on TORn but chaffed at the restrictions on topic, etc. (which were then tighter than they are now), formed a private forum, and it's still very active. Membership has varied a little. Most of us have met at one time or another, either at TORn events, the RCMH concerts in NYC, or on our own trips for one reason or another.

I like Facebook because it's a good place to keep up with people I love but don't see or hear from regularly, including not only local friends but also far-flung relatives (two of my kids, nieces and nephews) and old friends. They post milestones and snippets of news that I love to see, and I do as well.

(This post was edited by Elizabeth on Nov 17 2012, 5:37pm)

Aunt Dora Baggins

Nov 17 2012, 5:43pm

Post #6 of 31 (602 views)
Facebook. [In reply to] Can't Post

I have a myspace account and a livejournal account, but I don't use them. I actually have two facebook accounts, one with my work e-mail and one with my personal e-mail, so I can keep them separate. The work account I mostly use for the gay-straight alliance of which I'm the faculty sponsor: we use it as our main form of communication about meetings, activities, etc. The personal account is pretty addictive, and it slowed my down on TORn, though I keep in touch with a lot of TORnsibs on fb too. It's confusing keeping track of who is who, between nicknames and other names. I don't play games or do quizzes on fb, but I do spend a lot of time enjoying the things people post, sharing photos, etc. One of my fb heroes is George Takei <3


Nov 17 2012, 6:22pm

Post #7 of 31 (587 views)
Facebook & Twitter [In reply to] Can't Post

I have. Facebook account, but mostly use it to post pictures of my children for my family and friends to see. I used it frequently back in the early 2000s when I was in college, but not as much anymore.

I use Twitter daily, mostly as a news feed. Rather than navigate to multiple sites, I just follow the sites on Twitter and follow the links they post. The only time I tweet is to ask sports reporters questions about my favorite teams. If the Green Bay Packers are playing, it's a guarantee I'm on Twitter.


Nov 17 2012, 7:02pm

Post #8 of 31 (575 views)
actively none [In reply to] Can't Post

I have a facebook account and i go on there to randomly look at the news feed every couple of days (nearing the weekend) or so to check for invites to parties/get togethers which i think facebook is good for, especially if you don't have everyone's mobile number, or they lost/damaged/stolen phone.

But i hardly ever write anything, if i do its birthday wishes for close friends, haven't posted a photo since i joined back in 2006 - i get tagged in them though by others. I dont think i have ever made a status myself - friends will put 'funny' ones on if i accidentally left myself logged in on my laptop - i get them back on their profiles Wink

But yeah im not really interested in what most people have to say on their. Might sound cold but most are acquaintances who other than during classes i dont talk to so i dont figure much in their life and vice versa. I think when i graduate and move away i will have a facebook friend cull and leave it with just my actual close friends - it seems to be something a few people are doing now on facebook and for some reason it makes them happy.


Nov 17 2012, 7:25pm

Post #9 of 31 (585 views)
actively none either [In reply to] Can't Post

The only social networking site that I am registred to, and go to at times is Twitter. I found it uselful to get news from actors, athletes, polticians ect. that I follow. I think it's a nice tool.

(This post was edited by sam90 on Nov 17 2012, 7:26pm)


Nov 17 2012, 8:22pm

Post #10 of 31 (574 views)
None [In reply to] Can't Post

Facebook was fine for a while (I was an early adopter). A few things drove me away: first my sense is that because my surname appears rather high on a list in alphabetical order I constantly received invitations to play games that anyone who was a real friend would know I'd have no interest in playing; people kept tagging me in photos I did not want to tagged in (vanity I guess); and employers began using it to snoop on employees or to evaluate job candidates.

That last reason is the big one for me. I know there are work arounds such as keeping two accounts, but honestly the very idea that it has become the norm for authorities to search Facebook, and worse hold the antics of others (people who write inane things on your wall for instance) against people they are checking on put me off completely. I'm a fairly transparent person with very few skeletons in the closet (as far as I'm concerned anyway) but I could no longer rationalize subjecting myself to that kind of scrutiny, nor do I understand why anyone else would want to.

A lawyer said on radio the other day that social media such as Facebook are cited as contributing factors in 80% of separations and divorces these days. Somehow or other Facebook and other social media have sown the seeds of mistrust, or jealousy, or provided a kind of temptation that is not easy to ignore (rivalling even pornography use I'd imagine)... again, why anyone would want to subject themselves to that is mind boggling.

As for the teens and young adults I know who use FB, there seems to be more problems associated with it -- whether through embarrassment, ease of harassment, or even apparent shunning (not been invited to any events lately) -- than there are benefits. The crazy complicated social problems I've seen my children, nieces and nephews have to contend with, that are directly related to FB use, are staggering... again why subject oneself to such nonsense?

Yes there are benefits to FB, or at least there were at one time. I know this because as I said, I have experienced them. For one thing, it is easy -- well as far as I can see that is the only benefit -- but at what cost? If your desire is to communicate with others, I don't see FB, except in some specific applications, as easier than texting, email, or heaven help us, hand writing a letter.

(This post was edited by SirDennisC on Nov 17 2012, 8:26pm)

Tol Eressea

Nov 19 2012, 8:19am

Post #11 of 31 (580 views)
Facebook is my lifeline to the outside world [In reply to] Can't Post

There is a lot that bothers me about FB, and I agree with much of what SirDennis said, but I find it very handy. As a full-time care giver for my dad, I don't get out much and I've become a bit isolated. Plus, most of my friends live in other states or abroad; and yes, you can e-mail, but for my friends who actually have lives (sorry, a little self-pityTongue) keeping in touch through FB is just more convenient. With FB, I can "like" or comment on a friend's picture without having to compose a more formal e-mail. It feels friendlier and more casual; there's a more natural give and take.

It's also a nice way to follow many different writers, journalists, etc without having to go to their individual blogs or web sites.


Nov 19 2012, 9:05am

Post #12 of 31 (521 views)
Awesome job! [In reply to] Can't Post

Go you!


Nov 19 2012, 9:17am

Post #13 of 31 (586 views)
I hear you! [In reply to] Can't Post

FB is problematic in so many ways. As well as all that you've mentioned, I feel really uncomfortable with FB's policies around posting photos - particularly as I'm a visual artist.

I guess I am quite lucky with my social group. Over half of my FB contacts are associated with a university club I'm involved with. There is always drama in the club, and sometimes our debates get heated and a bit angry, but for the most part our face-to-face and FB experiences are all positive and supportive.


Nov 19 2012, 4:18pm

Post #14 of 31 (547 views)
That's understandable [In reply to] Can't Post

and yes, you can e-mail, but for my friends who actually have lives (sorry, a little self-pity) keeping in touch through FB is just more convenient.

There was a study or an article or some such thing on the effect that FB is having on our perception of the lives of others. Sorry I don't have time to track it down though it may even have been discussed here at one time.

Anyway the main thrust of the commentary was that FB can create a kind of illusion that leads many users to believe that their own life is meaningless and dull, leading to melancholy and depression (I may be mis-remembering). I guess if you do use social networking sites it pays to keep in mind that people are usually trying to put their best foot forward, and not to assume that their lives are somehow more fulfilling or trouble free than your own. There is also a tendency for people to down-play or not talk about the "bad" things going on in their lives, which can further lead to feelings of isolation or being out of step with the rest of the world.

All that aside, I truly hope that you are visited with some relief and joy as you continue in the very noble task of caring for your father. At times the world hardly seems set up for us to do the right thing... so to you I say, well done.

(This post was edited by SirDennisC on Nov 19 2012, 4:23pm)


Nov 19 2012, 4:47pm

Post #15 of 31 (525 views)
Facebook [In reply to] Can't Post

I go on several times a day. I originally joined for the original purpose - to keep in touch with the other students from my school - but soon found it's the easiest way communicate with my family and with many of my friends. I've reconnected with a lot of old friends as well.

I have learned that many people don't like being tagged in photos, so I'm careful about that (and you can remove the tag if someone tags you!). I also "unsubscribed" from pretty much everything but updates & photos for all my friends, so I don't see their comments to people I don't know. I hide the feed from oversharers - the folks who have to tell you every detail of their lives - and only check their pages once a week or so. As for privacy, I refuse to be paranoid. For one thing I have no skeletons in the closet, and for another, I'm pretty sure I am NOT the demographic anyone's interested in; I'm too old, and I'm not a shopaholic.


Nov 19 2012, 9:55pm

Post #16 of 31 (596 views)
None and I don't see why I should [In reply to] Can't Post

I've got a phone and I've got email. I know how to contact the people who really interest me and they know how to contact me. All the others... what do I care, how somebody I went to elementary school with spends his day? I'm afraid I just don't get the idea behind social networks.

Tol Eressea

Nov 20 2012, 4:57am

Post #17 of 31 (542 views)
Thank you, SirDennis :) [In reply to] Can't Post



All that aside, I truly hope that you are visited with some relief and joy as you continue in the very noble task of caring for your father. At times the world hardly seems set up for us to do the right thing... so to you I say, well done.

I really appreciate your kind words Smile

And, yes, I've read similar things about "Facebook envy" and I try to guard against it - and usually succeed - but I have my weak moments. Unsure I'm proud of my friends who are doing well and I don't want them to feel they can't share for fear of making me feel bad, so I cheer them on and try not to compare their apple lives with my orange life...so to speakCrazy

But thanks for the reminder, I needed it!

(This post was edited by zarabia on Nov 20 2012, 4:58am)


Nov 20 2012, 9:50am

Post #18 of 31 (545 views)
Like this post very much [In reply to] Can't Post

*sticks thumb in air*


Nov 20 2012, 3:45pm

Post #19 of 31 (486 views)
that's one study [In reply to] Can't Post

there's another that showed that people release oxytocin - the hormone that makes us feel connected and trusting - while "chatting" on line with those they care about, just as they would if interacting with those people in real life. Connection is connection.

And as I've noticed many times on this very forum, whatever issues a person has are going to come up in interactions with others, no matter how those interactions take place. Blaming the medium doesn't solve the problem. Expecting others not to accidentally push my personal buttons hasn't worked very well for me either. There's one aspect of my life in which I envy others who have had better luck, but I'm well aware that that is MY problem to solve and that I can't expect them not to be happy (or pretend they aren't) so I won't be reminded of my own failures in that regard. So instead, I pay attention to what they say as possible guidance for how I might do better.


Nov 20 2012, 3:47pm

Post #20 of 31 (477 views)
Oops - I didn't read the first post before taking the poll [In reply to] Can't Post

I may have given incorrect answers because of it. Depending on what you mean by actively, the answer is probably "Other" or "None".

I do not use Facebook at all.

I have an LJ account, but I don't post much on it and only follow a few friends on it. I can go a week without checking it, though. I did choose this in the poll, and depending what you mean by "actively", this may or may not be correct.

I also have a deviantArt account and use this a fair amount, but more for art and writing than social networking.

And I also have a twitter account, but mostly use it to follow my favorite sports team and a couple singers. I don't really use it for social networking, so this was probably a poor choice for me.

I also use one other site for art and writing primarily, and a little bit of social networking.

Really, IMing and Skype is where most of my social networking happens, I'd say, for my close friends, and a combo of art sites and LJ for those less close. And, of course, a few message boards.


Nov 20 2012, 4:01pm

Post #21 of 31 (484 views)
y'all are making me feel [In reply to] Can't Post

like I must know the most interesting, thoughtful, and intelligent people in the world! I know some "oversharers" for sure, but most of the time I really enjoy what my friends post. Especially the links to great articles, videos, movie reviews, etc.


Nov 20 2012, 4:07pm

Post #22 of 31 (493 views)
Certainly I'm not advocating [In reply to] Can't Post

playing down your accomplishments as not to upset those who may be struggling. But because of the shotgun (broadly cast, broadcast) style of communication on FB, even if you wanted to, that level of tact is removed from the equation, unless you go to PM or IM (chat). And it may be that only your real friends are interested in hearing about your troubles, or feel equipped to comment on them.

Consider a likely scenario in a common feed in a circle of friends:
Buddy A: Oh my mom just died.
Buddy B: Good news everyone, we're having a baby!

Now this isn't outside of the norm in terms of the type of news one might receive on any given day, but hardly do you see such statements side by side in a single conversation (or what reads as a single conversation).

Oxytocin release makes sense (if only it came in pill form) as do a whole range of other chemical reactions and feelings that attend regular human interaction. (Usually) there's a real person on the other side of the monitor and it pays to act accordingly. Face to face might leave it's own unique affect on our health, but the kind of interaction we have online, when it is focused (ie when we don't mistake broadcast for intimate or narrowcast) obviously is a decent substitute, especially where face to face isn't practical.

(This post was edited by SirDennisC on Nov 20 2012, 4:10pm)

Arwen's daughter

Nov 20 2012, 4:31pm

Post #23 of 31 (489 views)
Facebook & Livejournal [In reply to] Can't Post

Though most of my Livejournal acquaintances have wandered off. I have a twitter and google+ account but rarely check them.


Nov 20 2012, 5:41pm

Post #24 of 31 (526 views)
FB pros and cons [In reply to] Can't Post

FB has enabled me to reconnect with past classmates and coworkers that I wouldn't be in touch with otherwise. I've been able to vicariously enjoy quite a few exotic vacations that way too.

What I don't understand is the trivial stuff that people post: "Jeff is at the gym." "Yvette just listened to (music X)." Who cares?

An odd FB trait I notice is that the type of friends you only hear from when they want something from you are the ones who will have 600+ friends, which no one can keep up with. It makes you realize how different your definition of friendship is from theirs.


Nov 20 2012, 10:55pm

Post #25 of 31 (532 views)
I think the whole life story style of fb updating... [In reply to] Can't Post

...is something that happens when people first get fb, and it as their time on the site goes on they update less and less. I remember when I first got fb, around the time when it started to become really popular, everyone was using it like an online diary, posting multiple status updates a day. These days however, there are very few of my fb friends who do that.
I certainly post very few updates these days...most of the time they're either commenting on my football team or posting an article or a link that I think various friends might find interesting.

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