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Brethil
Half-elven
Dec 6 2013, 2:58am
Views: 1828
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Tolkienia Times: December, "The Desolation of Smaug" Edition. Page 4
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EXCLUSIVE: The Times Interviews Smaug the Stupendous on the upcoming film, "The Desolation of Smaug." We were granted satellite access to the star of the upcoming major motion picture, directed by Sir Peter Jackson, "The Desolation of Smaug." The tale was initially reported in the form of a book but Professor JRR Tolkien. Smaug and his agent, Mr. Ecks, spoke with us via sattelite last week. TIMES: "Hello, it's very gracious of you to speak with us. You are looking wonderful these days. And hello Mr. Ecks." SMAUG: "Yes, I know." MR. ECKS "Hello, everyone." TIMES: "Can you give us some insights into working with Sir Peter, Smaug?" SMAUG: "The magnificent." TIMES: "Sir Peter the magnificent? That's high praise indeed!" SMAUG: "No, ME. You say, 'Smaug the Magnificent'. That's how this works." MR. ECKS: (sotto voce) "Its for the best. Trust me." TIMES: "Apologies...was it difficult working with Men and Dwarves, Smaug the Magnificent?" SMAUG: "In a way, yes. Imagine working with, let me say, dozens of succulent, walking, talking pork pies and you get how I felt." TIMES: "Have you studied acting, Smaug the Magnificent?" SMAUG: "No, I am a Method actor. That is why I play myself." TIMES: "Can you give us any insights into working with Sir Peter, Smaug the Magnificent?" SMAUG: "Well, he is a taskmaster, but he appreciates the material and respects my tale. He realizes that I am the center of the tale, and filmed it thus, as per our contract. So because of that, and ONLY because of that, I accepted his direction." TIMES: "Have you read "The Hobbit," Smaug the Magnificent?" SMAUG: "No, I do not read. The whole fire-and-paper thing is a constant problem for me. I'm seriously debating getting an e-reader." MR. ECKS: (hurriedly) "Nope, Smaug the Magnificent doesn't need to read. That's my job. NO need to read The Hobbit. Or contracts. Or scripts. Nope. All good." TIMES: "So how do you feel about the ending, Smaug the Magnificent? Have you come to terms with it? Was it emotionally difficult for you to film?" SMAUG: (puzzled) "Difficult to film? Why would it be? After all ... I win." MR. ECKS: "Yup, that's fine, it was no problem, good ending..." TIMES: "You...win? I'm confused. Hmmmm, based on the book..." MR. ECKS: (drawing hand across throat) "Shhhh." SMAUG: "Wait. What does she mean, 'based on the book'? I WIN! Right? THAT is what I signed on for." (smoke puffs from nostrils) "You KNOW how I feel about LOSING! I had better WIN!" MR. ECKS: (waving franically) "INTERVIEW OVER! THANK YOU!" (picture blacks out) SMAUG: "GET BACK HERE ECKS!" (roar of fire heard) Our link terminated at that point. We hope to contact Smaug the Magnificent again and further discuss his film work with Sir Peter, his future career aspirations, his reaction to the media frenzy surrounding The Desolation of Smaug, and to confirm the continued existence of Mr. Ecks. This Month's NERDSNORT Joy: There once was a knight named Sir Peter, Who everyone said, "What a leader!" He filmed hobbits, a wizard, Some dwarves, a big lizard. And asked us to come to the theater! - Dame Ioreth, an original Limerick
The second TORn Amateur Symposium is running right now, in the Reading Room. Come have a look and maybe stay to chat!
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Tolkienia Times: December, "The Desolation of Smaug" Edition. Front Page
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Brethil
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Dec 6 2013, 2:42am
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Tolkienia Times: December, "The Desolation of Smaug" Edition. Page 2
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Brethil
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Dec 6 2013, 2:47am
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Tolkienia Times: December, "The Desolation of Smaug" Edition. Page 3
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Brethil
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Dec 6 2013, 2:53am
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Tolkienia Times: December, "The Desolation of Smaug" Edition. Page 4
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Brethil
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Dec 6 2013, 2:58am
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Tolkienia Times: December, "The Desolation of Smaug" Edition. Page 5
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Brethil
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Dec 6 2013, 3:06am
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Tolkienia Times: December, "The Desolation of Smaug" Edition. Page 6
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Brethil
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Dec 6 2013, 3:18am
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Any song that tempts me to sing is an automatic fave
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The Grey Elf
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Dec 6 2013, 11:49am
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Agreed...I found it very touching too Grey Elf!
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Brethil
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Dec 6 2013, 9:59pm
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Thank you both,
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Meneldor
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Dec 7 2013, 12:00am
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Then kudos to Ethel, too!
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The Grey Elf
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Dec 7 2013, 12:09am
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Thanks! Meneldor did the real work. I just found an old Sea song
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Ethel Duath
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Dec 7 2013, 4:14am
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Excellent collaboration!
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Kim
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Dec 7 2013, 1:36am
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My goodness, what an amazing poem!
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Ethel Duath
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Dec 7 2013, 4:16am
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Agreed - it so much fun!
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Brethil
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Dec 7 2013, 4:56am
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Now, when is Smaug coming to help Gramma
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Ethel Duath
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Dec 7 2013, 4:59am
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What a lovely compliment, Ethel! Thank you so much!!! //
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The Grey Elf
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Dec 8 2013, 3:02am
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Wonderful!
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grammaboodawg
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Dec 7 2013, 2:40pm
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Thank you, gramma!!
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The Grey Elf
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Dec 8 2013, 3:00am
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Wonderful!
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dernwyn
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Dec 9 2013, 4:48am
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Great crossword! When do we get the answers?! :D I'm actually
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Ethel Duath
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Dec 7 2013, 4:58am
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In shall publish them in a few days...
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Brethil
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Dec 7 2013, 5:10am
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Awwwww....
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Rembrethil
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Dec 7 2013, 5:36am
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Yes, please Rem, on both!
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Brethil
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Dec 7 2013, 5:58am
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*laughs* Toasted Sheep Pass! :D OMG!
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grammaboodawg
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Dec 7 2013, 2:37pm
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I really don't know what it is ...
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DanielLB
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Dec 7 2013, 9:59pm
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Elven ennui...
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Brethil
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Dec 7 2013, 10:54pm
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Answers to the Crossword.....Maybe.......
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Rembrethil
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Dec 10 2013, 3:33am
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Heh! For me, not too bad.
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Ethel Duath
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Dec 10 2013, 3:46am
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Thanks Rem! This was fun
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Brethil
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Dec 10 2013, 9:55pm
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Pork Popsicle! I love it! :D
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grammaboodawg
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Dec 7 2013, 2:34pm
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Bwahahahahhaa!!!! *wild applause*
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grammaboodawg
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Dec 7 2013, 2:24pm
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I still think your secret is secret Gramma...
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Brethil
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Dec 7 2013, 5:42pm
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Your lifetime or his?
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Meneldor
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Dec 7 2013, 6:20pm
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Gives the M. One reason to extend Gramma's life indefinitely
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Ethel Duath
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Dec 7 2013, 6:51pm
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Ah! Now I must re-do the map! The voters have spoken. So now we have:
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Ethel Duath
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Dec 7 2013, 4:55am
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All hail the Party Winners!
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grammaboodawg
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Dec 7 2013, 2:13pm
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Having only managed to visit this lovely town,
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Dame Ioreth
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Dec 7 2013, 4:58pm
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Yes, maybe we need to run a Real Estate section next
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Brethil
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Dec 7 2013, 5:44pm
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More than just rumors
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Kim
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Dec 7 2013, 10:56pm
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A happy and welcome sight!!!!! //
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Brethil
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Dec 7 2013, 11:42pm
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