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Dreamdeer
Valinor
Jun 6 2008, 4:36pm
Views: 5572
Shortcut
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The doctor has confirmed that my grandmother's tumor is indeed malignant and terminal. I will go to her when she has her ameliorative surgery, which is not yet scheduled. She is 92 years old, has outlived her husband and her only son, is mostly blind, mostly deaf, lost most of her sense of taste and smell, and she finds her physical weakness supremely frustrating, when she had been abnormally strong for most of her life, up until her mid 80's (she used to be the go-to person for heavy lifting at her factory, because the men had all injured their backs.) I do not begrudge her the right to move on to something better; I believe that the discomforts of our final years are tantamount to a mother bird removing the down from a nest when it's time for the baby bird to fly. But I will miss our conversations, for she is intelligent, perceptive, lyrical, and appreciates the quirky side of life. The plus side is that I can eulogize her while she yet lives. People often don't know what to say to the terminally ill. It seems to me that the best thing you can say is "Thank you for all that you have given me over the years!" Let the person know that her life meant something, she accomplished something, she can let her life close without regrets. So here's a toast to a grand, brave lady, who gave me language! Really. I had stopped talking before she got custody of me, and she started me up again, introduced me to the whole amazing world of words! For my bedtime stories she read to me from books of classical poetry, Browning and Byron, Shelley and Keats, Tennyson and Frost, all of those marvelous storytellers in verse. She would come home exhausted from the factory night-shift, her fingers almost blue with cold, but we would wake up just to hear her story-tell us back to sleep again; she never said, "Oh, go back to bed, I want to get some sleep!" She taught me to read, and when the school system would have stifled my imagination, she fought them, and taught me to write. When she saw that I had a passion for it, she insisted that I write every day, and would not let anyone interfere with my writing time. She had no idea what Tolkien's writings were about, but merely upon hearing about them, she followed her instinct and asked Grandpa to find his books for me anyway (Only "The Hobbit" and "The Lord of the Rings" were available in those days.) Grandpa eventually had to special-order them through a liquor store that had a book rack, of all things! They were my first New books; before then everything I had came from a used bookstore near the beach, where she and Grandpa would take us frequently for the latest load, ten cents a copy, five if the book was badly damaged, one free for every two we traded in. Every weekend she and Grandpa would take us to either the library, the museums, or someplace in nature (the mountains, the beach, the desert, the chaparrel country.) We may have been poor, but she saw to our education as scrupulously as Bilbo educated Sam. Some people here have said that they like the way that I write. You can blame Grandma for that.
My website http://www.dreamdeer.grailmedia.com offers fanfic, and message-boards regarding intentional community or faerie exploration.
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Subject
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User
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Time
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*Kicks in Doors* It's FIESTA TIME Y'all!!
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 6 2008, 4:00pm
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*slinking in*...
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diedye
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Jun 6 2008, 4:04pm
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*whispers* hey! You forgot your drink!
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 6 2008, 4:06pm
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Happy Friday!
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Arwen's daughter
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Jun 6 2008, 4:07pm
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I'm glad you came through unscathed!
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 6 2008, 4:09pm
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Glad you all got through safe!
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Eventides
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Jun 6 2008, 4:19pm
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Hey there, gramma! :)
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Eventides
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Jun 6 2008, 4:09pm
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Howdy Eventides!
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 6 2008, 4:20pm
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Thank you! :) //
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Eventides
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Jun 6 2008, 4:23pm
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Gramma! Feet off the bar!
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Elberbeth
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Jun 6 2008, 4:14pm
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*looks over shoulder* Here ya go!
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 6 2008, 4:21pm
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Well, I am in need of something bracing today!
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 6 2008, 4:17pm
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Oh No!!!
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Arwen's daughter
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Jun 6 2008, 4:20pm
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Thanks...
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 6 2008, 5:03pm
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Oh no!
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Elberbeth
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Jun 6 2008, 4:21pm
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Yes,
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 6 2008, 5:05pm
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Oh no!
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Eventides
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Jun 6 2008, 4:22pm
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Thank you...
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 6 2008, 5:07pm
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Oh... no! Here...
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 6 2008, 4:23pm
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Thank you, gramma!
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 6 2008, 5:09pm
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Oh dear... I know how you feel...
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diedye
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Jun 6 2008, 4:29pm
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Thanks, Diedye
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 6 2008, 5:12pm
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Oh dear!
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Lily Fairbairn
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Jun 6 2008, 4:34pm
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Ooooh,
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 6 2008, 5:15pm
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Oh,my, that's scary!
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Aunt Dora Baggins
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Jun 6 2008, 4:38pm
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Thank you, Aunt Dora.
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 6 2008, 5:17pm
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Blessing for you
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Dreamdeer
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Jun 6 2008, 4:44pm
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Thanks,
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 6 2008, 5:19pm
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wow- that's a hit!
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weaver
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Jun 6 2008, 4:47pm
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Thanks, Weaver.
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 6 2008, 5:21pm
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you're right on that...
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weaver
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Jun 6 2008, 5:41pm
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Thanks, Weaver!//
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 6 2008, 6:00pm
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Yikes!
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RosieLass
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Jun 6 2008, 4:55pm
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You know,
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 6 2008, 5:23pm
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Self-employment
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Dreamdeer
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Jun 6 2008, 7:03pm
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Ha! Brilliant. :) /
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Ataahua
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Jun 6 2008, 8:13pm
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That's cool!//
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 7 2008, 12:32am
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I highly recommend this book
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ElanorTX
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Jun 6 2008, 10:42pm
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Thank you,
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 7 2008, 12:31am
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How scary and awful
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Daughter of Nienna
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Jun 6 2008, 4:56pm
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Thanks, DoN.
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 6 2008, 5:29pm
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I am so sorry to hear this
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Rivendweller
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Jun 6 2008, 4:57pm
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Thank you...
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 6 2008, 5:31pm
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That's terrible!
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deej
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Jun 6 2008, 5:02pm
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Thanks, Deej,
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 6 2008, 5:32pm
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That is just not right ...
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Elven
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Jun 6 2008, 5:06pm
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No, it's not...
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 6 2008, 5:34pm
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Oh, no!
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dernwyn
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Jun 6 2008, 5:22pm
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Thank you, dernwyn,
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 6 2008, 5:36pm
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Fun, fun, fun...
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Idril Celebrindal
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Jun 6 2008, 5:23pm
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Thanks,
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 6 2008, 5:38pm
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Oh no!
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Peredhil lover
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Jun 6 2008, 6:01pm
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Thanks, so much, PL.
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 7 2008, 12:34am
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Sorry to hear that
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Eledhwen
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Jun 6 2008, 10:41pm
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Thanks, that is pretty much what we're doing right now!//
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 7 2008, 12:35am
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I'm so sorry to hear that.
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Kimi
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Jun 7 2008, 12:41am
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Thank you...
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 7 2008, 12:48am
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I am so sorry
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Starling
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Jun 7 2008, 1:38am
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Thank you,
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 7 2008, 9:13am
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Oh....No...
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Kelvarhin
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Jun 7 2008, 7:04am
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Thank you,
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 7 2008, 9:11am
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I just wanted to say "Thank You"
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OhioHobbit
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Jun 7 2008, 8:42pm
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You take care, dear Sir
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 8 2008, 12:59pm
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Could I have bucket with ice-cubes, please?
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Draupne
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Jun 6 2008, 4:18pm
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Sure!
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 6 2008, 4:25pm
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A glass of Bilbo's finest in honor of my Dad please...
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Rivendweller
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Jun 6 2008, 4:22pm
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Oh, Rivendweller...
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Eventides
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Jun 6 2008, 4:27pm
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Don't let anyone tell you
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Elberbeth
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Jun 6 2008, 4:27pm
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*tears* To your Father
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 6 2008, 4:29pm
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As others have said
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Aunt Dora Baggins
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Jun 6 2008, 4:41pm
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Rivendweller,
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 6 2008, 4:48pm
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Well-toasted!
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Dreamdeer
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Jun 6 2008, 4:50pm
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(((((hugs)))))
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RosieLass
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Jun 6 2008, 4:59pm
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Hear, hear
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deej
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Jun 6 2008, 5:04pm
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**raises glass in honor...**
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weaver
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Jun 6 2008, 5:09pm
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Cheers to your 'wonderful dear sweet Dad'
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Daughter of Nienna
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Jun 6 2008, 5:15pm
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That was beautiful ...
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Elven
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Jun 6 2008, 5:45pm
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{{hugs}}
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dernwyn
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Jun 6 2008, 5:46pm
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Thank-you ! To you and to everyone...
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Rivendweller
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Jun 6 2008, 6:03pm
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Ah, then the best of the old vineyards all around...
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weaver
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Jun 6 2008, 7:00pm
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*raises glass*
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Peredhil lover
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Jun 6 2008, 6:22pm
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*hugs* Riv.
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Ataahua
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Jun 6 2008, 7:59pm
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What a lovely toast!
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Roheryn
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Jun 6 2008, 10:40pm
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A lovely toast to a wonderful man.
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Kimi
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Jun 6 2008, 11:55pm
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I'll raise a glass to your Dad
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Starling
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Jun 7 2008, 1:42am
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Hauoli la Hanau to me. . . (singing)
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Daughter of Nienna
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Jun 6 2008, 4:26pm
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Indeed! Happy Birthday!!!
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Eventides
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Jun 6 2008, 4:30pm
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Thanks, back at you //
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Daughter of Nienna
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Jun 6 2008, 4:41pm
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Happy Birthday, DoN!
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 6 2008, 4:30pm
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Thanks Gramma
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Daughter of Nienna
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Jun 6 2008, 4:43pm
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Oops... forgot my drink
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Daughter of Nienna
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Jun 6 2008, 4:32pm
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LOL on the "hipped cream"!
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Elberbeth
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Jun 6 2008, 4:35pm
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Me too... LOL
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Daughter of Nienna
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Jun 6 2008, 4:40pm
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*loads up cup* You bet!
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 6 2008, 4:35pm
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perfect! . . . Ahhh, that's ono (good)! //
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Daughter of Nienna
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Jun 6 2008, 4:47pm
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Happy B-day! //
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diedye
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Jun 6 2008, 4:42pm
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Thank you, Diedye
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Daughter of Nienna
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Jun 7 2008, 9:34am
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Happy Birthday!! //
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Arwen's daughter
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Jun 6 2008, 4:46pm
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Thank you, AD
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Daughter of Nienna
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Jun 7 2008, 9:43am
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Happy birthday!
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Dreamdeer
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Jun 6 2008, 4:53pm
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I am so glad you see it that way
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Daughter of Nienna
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Jun 7 2008, 9:38am
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HIPY PAPY BTHUTHDTH THUTHDY BTHUTHDY!
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RosieLass
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Jun 6 2008, 5:01pm
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LOL. :) //
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Eventides
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Jun 6 2008, 5:06pm
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Refreshing!
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Daughter of Nienna
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Jun 7 2008, 9:42am
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Happy Birthday to you! //
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deej
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Jun 6 2008, 5:05pm
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Happy Birthday back at ya!
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Daughter of Nienna
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Jun 7 2008, 9:52am
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Happy birthday!
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weaver
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Jun 6 2008, 5:15pm
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This image I am working on
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Daughter of Nienna
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Jun 7 2008, 10:00am
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Have the best birthday ever, DoN!//
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 6 2008, 5:39pm
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It was right up there with the best
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Daughter of Nienna
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Jun 7 2008, 10:05am
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Glad to hear you had such a nice birthday!
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 8 2008, 7:50am
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Sounds like a lot of fun! Many Happy Returns, DoN! //
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dernwyn
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Jun 6 2008, 5:47pm
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And, a lot of fun it was, indeed!
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Daughter of Nienna
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Jun 7 2008, 10:06am
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Many Happy Returns for the Day DoN!!
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Elven
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Jun 6 2008, 5:50pm
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Birthdays spent with friends is magical indeed!
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Daughter of Nienna
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Jun 7 2008, 10:10am
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Happy Birthday!
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Peredhil lover
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Jun 6 2008, 6:27pm
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Thanks...
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Daughter of Nienna
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Jun 7 2008, 10:12am
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Happy Birthday DoN !
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Rivendweller
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Jun 6 2008, 11:16pm
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Reflecting on my day...
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Daughter of Nienna
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Jun 7 2008, 10:22am
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Happy birthday to you! /
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Kimi
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Jun 6 2008, 11:56pm
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Reflecting on my day...
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Daughter of Nienna
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Jun 7 2008, 10:22am
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Happy birthday indeed
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Starling
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Jun 7 2008, 1:43am
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Thank you, Starling
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Daughter of Nienna
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Jun 7 2008, 10:24am
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A wee dram, please, gramma!
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Lily Fairbairn
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Jun 6 2008, 4:26pm
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Heheheh! :)
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Eventides
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Jun 6 2008, 4:32pm
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*sniffs blooming heather* ahhhhhh
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 6 2008, 4:34pm
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MIK! MIK!
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Ginger
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Jun 6 2008, 5:15pm
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Oh,
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 6 2008, 5:42pm
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Yum! :-)
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Aunt Dora Baggins
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Jun 7 2008, 5:10am
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WooHoo - It's Friday!
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Ettelewen
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Jun 6 2008, 4:27pm
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That sound like so much fun!
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 6 2008, 4:38pm
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To the newbies! *Raises glass of iced tea*
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Aunt Dora Baggins
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Jun 6 2008, 4:36pm
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Wow! That's quite a schedule!
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 6 2008, 4:40pm
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Thanks, Gramma! //
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Aunt Dora Baggins
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Jun 6 2008, 4:48pm
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Addition (too late to edit post)
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Aunt Dora Baggins
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Jun 6 2008, 4:48pm
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Condolences
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Dreamdeer
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Jun 6 2008, 5:04pm
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Have a great weekend Aunt Dora //
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Daughter of Nienna
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Jun 6 2008, 5:07pm
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*joins in toast* Hear hear! /
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Ataahua
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Jun 6 2008, 8:02pm
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cheers to everyone and
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Zmulady
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Jun 6 2008, 8:09pm
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My Grandma
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Dreamdeer
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Jun 6 2008, 4:36pm
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She sounds like an amazing person
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Elberbeth
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Jun 6 2008, 4:40pm
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What an amazing woman!
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 6 2008, 4:44pm
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That is truly amazing!
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Eventides
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Jun 6 2008, 4:44pm
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What a wonderful tribute!
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Aunt Dora Baggins
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Jun 6 2008, 4:54pm
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How fortunate you are to have had her in your life.
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 6 2008, 4:55pm
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To Grandma!
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RosieLass
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Jun 6 2008, 5:03pm
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Tears & joy!
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Daughter of Nienna
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Jun 6 2008, 5:05pm
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To a great lady!
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weaver
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Jun 6 2008, 5:14pm
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Wow! What an amazing woman
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Rivendweller
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Jun 6 2008, 5:50pm
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Only too happy to
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dernwyn
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Jun 6 2008, 5:53pm
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Your Grandma is an amazing woman!
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Peredhil lover
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Jun 6 2008, 6:41pm
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Wow.
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Ataahua
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Jun 6 2008, 8:05pm
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That's a wonderful tribute
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Roheryn
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Jun 6 2008, 10:52pm
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Thanks to everyone!
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Dreamdeer
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Jun 7 2008, 5:04am
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Correction
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Dreamdeer
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Jun 7 2008, 3:09pm
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What an amazing lady.
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Kimi
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Jun 6 2008, 11:59pm
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What a wonderful legacy she will leave
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Starling
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Jun 7 2008, 1:47am
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A beer please gramma
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Hengist
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Jun 6 2008, 4:38pm
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You got it!
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 6 2008, 4:45pm
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Let me get in on that beer with you Hengist.
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Ataahua
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Jun 6 2008, 8:06pm
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Great idea!
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 6 2008, 10:21pm
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I'm starting my celebrating early this weekend.
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deej
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Jun 6 2008, 4:50pm
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Wow! Happy Birthday x 2 !! :D
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 6 2008, 4:55pm
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Thanks, gramma!
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deej
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Jun 6 2008, 5:19pm
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Happy Birthday to you both!!! :)
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Eventides
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Jun 6 2008, 5:02pm
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Thanks - you, too! //
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deej
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Jun 6 2008, 5:20pm
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Happy happy to you both!
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RosieLass
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Jun 6 2008, 5:05pm
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Thanks!
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deej
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Jun 6 2008, 5:21pm
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happiest of birthdays!
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weaver
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Jun 6 2008, 5:11pm
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Thanks! //
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deej
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Jun 6 2008, 5:22pm
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Happy happy birthday to you both!
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Ginger
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Jun 6 2008, 5:13pm
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Thanks! //
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deej
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Jun 6 2008, 5:23pm
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Happy Birthday to you & Shuya...
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Daughter of Nienna
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Jun 6 2008, 5:19pm
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Geminis are the coolest people
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deej
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Jun 6 2008, 5:24pm
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We make it too
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Daughter of Nienna
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Jun 7 2008, 9:46am
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Happy Birthday!
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 6 2008, 5:45pm
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Joys of Fall
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Dreamdeer
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Jun 6 2008, 7:09pm
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Ooooh Kayyyy!
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 7 2008, 12:39am
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*grin*
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Peredhil lover
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Jun 7 2008, 5:45am
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Well,
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 7 2008, 9:16am
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Many Happy Returns for the Day deej!
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Elven
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Jun 6 2008, 5:54pm
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Wow - double the "Many Happy Returns" for you both! //
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dernwyn
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Jun 6 2008, 5:55pm
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Happy Birthday, and many happy returns! //
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Peredhil lover
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Jun 6 2008, 6:51pm
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Happy birthday to you
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Starling
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Jun 7 2008, 1:50am
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Summertime!
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dernwyn
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Jun 6 2008, 5:05pm
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Absolutely!
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 6 2008, 5:09pm
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Nice!
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dernwyn
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Jun 6 2008, 5:56pm
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The hot weather is coming
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Ginger
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Jun 6 2008, 5:12pm
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Thank you!
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dernwyn
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Jun 6 2008, 6:00pm
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A tall, cold iced tea please!
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RosieLass
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Jun 6 2008, 5:07pm
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Here ya go...
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 6 2008, 5:10pm
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*hangs out self-serve sign* Well, folks...
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 6 2008, 5:08pm
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A really cold hard lemonade please
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Ginger
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Jun 6 2008, 5:09pm
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Hey! That sounds like
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 6 2008, 5:13pm
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Today I celebrate a different geekiness
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Lady of Light
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Jun 6 2008, 5:12pm
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You can do a Dew any old day
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 6 2008, 5:14pm
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Now I've REALLY gotta go! :D Cheers, y'all! //
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 6 2008, 5:15pm
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Was that the barkeep I just saw scream out the door ...
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Elven
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Jun 6 2008, 5:37pm
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No...
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 6 2008, 7:10pm
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I'm graduating in a week!
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Ainu Laire
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Jun 6 2008, 5:43pm
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Congratulations!!!
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 6 2008, 5:50pm
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Congratulations!
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Elven
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Jun 6 2008, 7:02pm
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What a rollercoaster!
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Dreamdeer
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Jun 6 2008, 7:06pm
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What a lot to carry!
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 6 2008, 7:13pm
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Congratulations!
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Starling
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Jun 7 2008, 1:57am
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It must feel like
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dernwyn
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Jun 7 2008, 3:01am
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*rushes in, reaches behind the bar for her K&C*....
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Patty
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Jun 6 2008, 7:08pm
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Take your hands off that!
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 6 2008, 7:14pm
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It's boiling here in Southern Canada!
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One Ringer
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Jun 6 2008, 7:14pm
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Send a little bit of that West, okay?
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Elberbeth
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Jun 6 2008, 7:21pm
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No problem!//
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One Ringer
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Jun 6 2008, 7:28pm
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Floating in the pool?
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 6 2008, 10:24pm
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Likewise gramma! :) //
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One Ringer
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Jun 7 2008, 12:03pm
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There'd better be some Heineken left too...
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leo
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Jun 6 2008, 7:16pm
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Uphill both ways...
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Ataahua
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Jun 6 2008, 8:15pm
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It just so happens
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 6 2008, 10:26pm
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I may be a bit late to the party but I have a lot to celebrate today!
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Tintallė
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Jun 6 2008, 9:01pm
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Congratulations!
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Ettelewen
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Jun 6 2008, 9:04pm
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Woohoo Congratulations!
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 6 2008, 10:30pm
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How wonderful!
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 7 2008, 12:50am
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Congratulations, and enjoy the visit! //
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dernwyn
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Jun 7 2008, 3:07am
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Congratulations!
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Dreamdeer
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Jun 7 2008, 4:49am
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Can I
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Artanis
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Jun 6 2008, 9:16pm
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Good luck with the allergies
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Arwen's daughter
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Jun 6 2008, 10:12pm
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You bet!
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 6 2008, 10:36pm
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Thankyou
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Artanis
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Jun 7 2008, 6:46am
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Off out for a walk shortly ...
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Eledhwen
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Jun 6 2008, 10:40pm
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You got it, E :D
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 8 2008, 12:55pm
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going on retreat with Ron Rolheiser
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ElanorTX
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Jun 6 2008, 10:48pm
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I hope you have a wonderful retreat!
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 8 2008, 12:57pm
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Hello!
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Jazmine
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Jun 7 2008, 5:14pm
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I am sorry to hear that.
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Alcarcalime
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Jun 7 2008, 6:49pm
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Oh, I'm sorry!
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Peredhil lover
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Jun 7 2008, 8:08pm
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Oh Jazmine, I'm sorry
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 8 2008, 12:46pm
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Dear Jazmine!
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Dreamdeer
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Jun 8 2008, 7:18pm
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*grabs every bottle in sight*...
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Eowyn of Penns Woods
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Jun 7 2008, 5:55pm
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Got 2 hands free?
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 8 2008, 12:51pm
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Poor Eowyn!
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Dreamdeer
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Jun 8 2008, 7:21pm
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*jumps into ice bucket*
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glorfin
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Jun 7 2008, 11:18pm
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Here ya go!
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grammaboodawg
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Jun 8 2008, 12:53pm
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Worth it later. Not so fun now. Thanks, gramma!
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glorfin
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Jun 8 2008, 9:40pm
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Christmas Carols
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Dreamdeer
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Jun 8 2008, 7:24pm
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You're too kind!
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glorfin
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Jun 8 2008, 9:39pm
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