Apr 1 2014, 7:05am
Do the admins have something to tell us? As clear as day it says The Silmarillion decology has been confirmed. Confirmed!
Well, this is most bizarre! The Silmarillion movie confirmed AND a new movie board? What are the admins up to?
I was taking my daily stroll through the TORn forums this morning, and was startled to see a new board. "The Silmarillion?!" I thought. Take a look for yourselves. It's right there! I've taken a couple of screencaps as evidence:
Click image to view
I figured it must be a relatively new board since there were so few posts and threads. Many of the regulars have already posted in it. Here's a screencap of the threads in case no one believes me:
There was a lot of excitement and (shockingly) friendliness in the official announcement thread: "Disney acquires movie rights to The Silmarillion - first move coming 2017!". Everyone agreed with each other, and were most polite with one another. For the first time ever, opinions were stated and no one argued. In all my excitement, I couldn't help but make my own (usual) thread, which can be viewed here:
It has been a couple of hours since I posted it, but it is still awaiting any replies. Perhaps people have just missed it in all the excitement? Even the tumble weed hasn't shown up yet.
I decided to see what everyone else was talking about. There were plenty of threads to look through. Brethil's thread was the most recent, but also the most contentious. I wasn't sure what to think of it, and I couldn't believe so many people were agreeing with her!
What's Richard Armitage ever done wrong? I thought everyone loved him? There's about 18 Richard Armitage threads on Page 1 alone in the "Off Topic" board - I always presumed he was popular.
Bomby's 2768 line thread on his top 10 Silmarillion scenes was an enjoyable read. You had to read it all backwards, mind, for any of it to make sense. Gramma announced that her local theater had given the keys to the premises, in fact, they just gave the whole theater to her since she bought 900 tickets for the first Silmarillion movie. All the staff had taken an early holiday and left Gramma serving the ice cream. I feel a bit pathetic just owning the 1 ticket.
There were three threads that were rather confusing, and need to be read to be believed. dormouse announced that the movies will be a flop and she's given up bothering anymore. She also copied into her thread an angry letter that she had sent to Peter Jackson. Glorfindela realised that she actually *loved* Orlando Bloom, his acting, and his interpretation of Legolas. She set up a petition to have him feature in all of the movies, and to appear in all the advertisement material. Nobody agreed with her. And geordie's "My thoughts on this" were very surprising!
The most entertaining thread was Starling's "Could my dog play Huan?"
Some of the suggestions were great, and people ended up dressing their pets in costumes and posting them in the thread. Kelvarhin created a brilliant Ungoliant costume for Midgey and sent it to Starling. Midgey loved it too much - Starling is still trying to get him off the ceiling as I type this. Starling says she hasn't eaten in days - chicken, cheese, rice and carrots - he's taken everything out of the cupboards and created a nest in the corner. We've sent a TORn food parcel to her just in case.
Moahunter and Lissuin have been cast in the films (possibly alongside Midgey, if he behaves). All I'm going to say is they've got the best roles EVER! Don't be fooled by the 59 replies to Ro's "random thoughts" thread. 50 of them are just her random thoughts.
I am surprised though that "The Physics of Balrog Wings" thread remains unlocked. DwellerInDale wrote an excellent essay on the *definitive answer* to "Do Balrgos Have Wings?" - he concluded yes and no (so it wasn't really conclusive at all). But the thread quickly descended (in usual TORn fashion) when pants became involved. Someone decided to photoshop Sil's pink bathing suit onto the Balrog which then resulted in people photoshopping the balrog in to rather compromising positions. The one reenacting the "healing scene" from DOS was hilarious. One of the admins tried to calm everyone down, but it just made it worse. People started writing Silmarillion jokes, and Aule's "Nonetheless they will have need of wood" caused many laughs. I think the thread has come sentient and there's no way of stopping it. You really need to check it out. Though the "Anyone else that posts in this thread is getting banned instantly" is probably putting people off.
So that's what I found. I can't believe there will be 10 Silmarillion movies. Unbelievable.
Getting access to the board is a bit hit and miss. Standing on one leg and reciting the Quenta Silmarillion does the trick for me. If anyone has managed to get access into the board, are there any new threads? What were your favourite posts and threads?
Disclaimer (highlight to read): This thread is intended for the viewing of all TORn users and may contain information that is confidential, privileged or unsuitable for overly sensitive persons with low self-esteem, no sense of humour or relentlessly fascinated with Tolkien. Whilst I endeavour to ensure that the information contained in this thread is true and accurate, I cannot give any warranty to that effect. Though I suspect the admins have their own private party board where we are all excluded from. I wonder if they bicker like we all do? Please take everything above in the spirit of fun. Where deemed appropriate, I have sought permission to use names and/or pictures. Any opinions expressed above are all made up, and should not be taken seriously. Apply smileys liberally throughout the above as needed. Queries for complaints can be sent to email@example.com. This disclaimer does not affect your statutory rights. I cannot be held responsible for the consequences of this secret information. The materials contained in this thread are not copyrighted - please feel free to make these threads real. I'd love it! No animals were harmed in the creation of this thread - Midgey is fine, but Starling really is missing all that food. Someone will be along shortly to cut Richard Armitage free from the tree. Gramma has also been refunded the price of 900 tickets. Spelling, grammar and punctuation in above thread is left as an exercise for the reader. If you haven't chuckled or smiled once during this thread, please add some nutmeg and egg whites onto your laptop/phone/device and place it in a warm oven for 40 minutes. Whisk briefly and let it stand for 2 hours before icing. Happy Tuesday!