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Enough of the silliness -- time for something a bit more serious.



Roheryn
Tol Eressea

Feb 7 2013, 9:03am


Views: 2121
Enough of the silliness -- time for something a bit more serious.

A pants thread! If we've done this already, I missed it. Thanks, Arandiel, for the nudge. Wink


Bilbo: “There was the city of Dale, its pants stretched far and wide, full of the bounties of vine and vale, crease-full and ponderous. For these pants lay before the doors of the greatest wardrobe in Middle-earth: Erebor. Stronghold of Thror, King under-Pants, mightiest of the dwarf lords.”

Balin: “You forget: the front zipper is sealed. There is no way into the pants.”

Balin: “I wouldn’t bother, laddie. Pants are named for the great deeds they do in bed.”

Thorin: “Our underwear is no concern of elves.”
Gandalf: “For goodness sake, Thorin, show him your pants!”
Thorin: “They are the legacy of my people; they are mine to protect, as are their secrets.”

Elrond: “So this is your purpose, to enter the Pants.”

Thorin: “Master Baggins, I suggest you keep your pants up.”

*********

Your turns!



little mouse
Rivendell

Feb 7 2013, 9:24am


Views: 1300
His armor rent wielding nothing but an oaken pants as a shield

 


jtarkey
Rohan


Feb 7 2013, 10:26am


Views: 1253
"What have I got in my pocket....

PSYCH! I'm not wearing pants"

"You're love of the halflings leaf has clearly slowed your mind"


peace1993
Bree


Feb 7 2013, 11:04am


Views: 1218
Why the half-ling?

Perhaps it is because he has a nice pair of pants.

Sam: Trust a Brandybuck and a Took.
Merry: What? That was just a detour, a shortcut.
Sam: Shortcut to what?
Pippin: Mushrooms!


Oin's parasite
Rivendell


Feb 7 2013, 12:08pm


Views: 1206
"Lay down your pants! Or we rip his off!"

 

"I've got parasites as big as my arm!"


jtarkey
Rohan


Feb 7 2013, 12:12pm


Views: 1161
HA! That was great.

Here's another...

"Did you know that your great-great-great uncle Bullroarer Took was so large he could wear a size 30? Well he could!"

"You're love of the halflings leaf has clearly slowed your mind"


Aranaes
Rivendell


Feb 7 2013, 12:15pm


Views: 1287
The giant Gundabad orc.....

.....had sworn to wipe out the line of Durin. He began by removing the King's pants.

'And I name you elf-friend and blessed. May your shadow never grow less (or stealing would be too easy)!'


Kirly
Lorien


Feb 7 2013, 12:19pm


Views: 1165
Fili: Kili! Give me your pants! //

 

My avatar photo is Lake Tekapo in New Zealand's South Island. Taken by me in 2004 on a Red Carpet Tours LOTR Movie Location Tour. 'Twas the Vacation of a Lifetime!

pictures taken while on the tour are here:
https://picasaweb.google.com/Kirly7/LOTRNewZealandTour#


Aranaes
Rivendell


Feb 7 2013, 12:23pm


Views: 1238
"These were forged in Gondolin, by the High Elves of the First Age. You could not wish for finer pants"//

 

'And I name you elf-friend and blessed. May your shadow never grow less (or stealing would be too easy)!'


peace1993
Bree


Feb 7 2013, 12:52pm


Views: 1167
Bilbo: “No, no, wait, wait, stop! Stop! We have to turn around.”

Gandalf: “What on earth is the matter?”

Bilbo: “I forgot my pants.”

Bofur: “Here! Use this.”

Thorin: "Move on!"

Sam: Trust a Brandybuck and a Took.
Merry: What? That was just a detour, a shortcut.
Sam: Shortcut to what?
Pippin: Mushrooms!


BoromirOfWinterfell
Rohan


Feb 7 2013, 2:05pm


Views: 1110
Yours are brilliant!

I will take each and everyone one of these shorts over the mightiest trousers. Durability, 100 percent cotton and enough room. I can ask no more than that.

Þæs ofereode, þisses swa mæg - that has passed, so may this.


Aranaes
Rivendell


Feb 7 2013, 2:28pm


Views: 1089
Strange for orcs to come so close to our pants. Something or someone has drawn them near. //

 

'And I name you elf-friend and blessed. May your shadow never grow less (or stealing would be too easy)!'


Aranaes
Rivendell


Feb 7 2013, 2:34pm


Views: 1129
Goblin King: Send word to the pale orc, tell him I have found his pants, they were lodged in my crevice! //

 

'And I name you elf-friend and blessed. May your shadow never grow less (or stealing would be too easy)!'


Aranaes
Rivendell


Feb 7 2013, 2:40pm


Views: 1142
Last one from me - Azog: Do you smell it? The scent of panties. I remember your father reeked pants, Thorin son of Thrain //

 

'And I name you elf-friend and blessed. May your shadow never grow less (or stealing would be too easy)!'


stoutfiles
Rohan


Feb 7 2013, 2:56pm


Views: 1071
The Council

Aragorn: “If by my life or death I can protect you, I will. You have my sword."
Legolas: "And you have my bow."
Gimli: "And MY PANTS!”


Brethil
Half-elven


Feb 7 2013, 3:16pm


Views: 1072
What Elrond really said

"Lindir, be a good Figwit and lay out my purple silk boxers. The ones with the sparkly white stars. So comfy for dinner. Oh, and while you are at it bring these Dwarves some Febreze and a lint roller."

...she took the point at once, but she also took the spoons.

(This post was edited by Brethil on Feb 7 2013, 3:17pm)


Oin's parasite
Rivendell


Feb 7 2013, 3:24pm


Views: 1054
More!

Bofur: "Pants! Giant pants!"

Thorin: "What in Durin's pants are going on?"
Gandalf: "You are being pantsed!"

Galadriel: "If ever you need my pants..."

Dwalin: Which way laddy? Is it down here? He said there would be pants, and lots of em'."

Balin: "Thrain, Thorins's father was driven mad by pants, taken prisoner or killed; we did not know. We were pantless..."

Bilbo: "Thrór's pants ruled with utter surety. Never doubting his pants would endure. For his pants laid secure in the hands of his son, and grandson."

Bilbo: " Ah Frodo...pants."

"I've got parasites as big as my arm!"


Alassëa Eruvande
Valinor


Feb 7 2013, 3:28pm


Views: 1055
In a hole in the pants there lived a hobbit.

Not nasty, dirty, wet pants, filled with the ends of threads and an oozy smell, nor yet dry, bare, sandy pants: it was hobbit-pants, and that means comfort waistband.



I am SMAUG! I kill when I wish! I am strong, strong, STRONG!
My armor is like tenfold shields! My teeth like swords! My claws, spears!
The shock of my tail, a thunderbolt! My wings, a hurricane! And my breath, death!


Brethil
Half-elven


Feb 7 2013, 3:49pm


Views: 1031
haha...!

Bifur to gandalf: "Ky kur Em-panada!" (Ah, here we know, at last, Thorin's secret Dwarf-name: Spicy-bottom Meat Pocket.)

Gandalf "Yes Bifur. We appear to be one pair of pants short."

Dwalin: "He is late is all. He cannot run with his pants down. He was at a pantsing of our kin. He will come."

...she took the point at once, but she also took the spoons.


xMb
The Shire

Feb 7 2013, 3:56pm


Views: 1040
Ah Frodo... pants.

I don't know why but I can't stop laughing at this Laugh


Brethil
Half-elven


Feb 7 2013, 4:01pm


Views: 1063
Thorin arrives

"Lost my pants twice. Think the elastic is gone. Didin't help that some woman with TORn written on her bodice keeps yanking them down."

...she took the point at once, but she also took the spoons.


Aragalen the Green
Gondor


Feb 7 2013, 4:01pm


Views: 1085
Gandalf presents Bilbo with Pants

Gandalf: "Here Bilbo, these are about your size"

Bilbo: "I can't take these"

Gandalf: "The pants are of Elvish make. They will glow blue when orcs or goblins are nearby"

Bilbo: " I've never worn pants in my life"

Gandalf: "And I hope you never have to. But if you do, true courage is not when to wear pants, but when to have a spare pair".

'"Never laugh at live dragons, Bilbo you fool!" he said to himself, and it became a favourite saying of his later, and passed into a proverb.'


(This post was edited by Aragalen the Green on Feb 7 2013, 4:07pm)


Eleniel
Tol Eressea


Feb 7 2013, 4:54pm


Views: 991
"Bert and Tom went off to the barrel....

William was having another drink. Then Bilbo plucked up courage and put his little hand in William's enormous pants."


"Choosing Trust over Doubt gets me burned once in a while, but I'd rather be singed than hardened."
¯ Victoria Monfort






Old Toby
Grey Havens


Feb 7 2013, 5:31pm


Views: 970
Enough!

"If we have worn these pants, do you not think others have worn them too? Eyes look East to the mountain - assessing, weighing. Do we stand back while others take what pants are rightfully ours? Or do we seize this chance to take back our pants? To Pants! To Pants!"

"Age is always advancing and I'm fairly sure it's up to no good." Harry Dresden (Jim Butcher)


Aragalen the Green
Gondor


Feb 7 2013, 5:42pm


Views: 973
These are Gundabad pants! They will outrun you! These are Rhosgobel trousers!...I'd like to see them try //

 

'"Never laugh at live dragons, Bilbo you fool!" he said to himself, and it became a favourite saying of his later, and passed into a proverb.'


cats16
Half-elven

Feb 7 2013, 6:10pm


Views: 667
"The woodsmen say

there is a Necropantser living in Dol Zippor."

"Balin, you know these pants. Lead the way."

"I am quite good with Dockers, if you must know."


Kirly
Lorien


Feb 7 2013, 6:33pm


Views: 606
room??

speaking of room in trousers....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=13-Rqjt5kwg

the commercial cracks me up!
oh, they have something for that too...
http://www.youtube.com/...aC7RSk5o&index=3

i don't know who created these commercials but they are hilarious!

My avatar photo is Lake Tekapo in New Zealand's South Island. Taken by me in 2004 on a Red Carpet Tours LOTR Movie Location Tour. 'Twas the Vacation of a Lifetime!

pictures taken while on the tour are here:
https://picasaweb.google.com/Kirly7/LOTRNewZealandTour#


GloryBox
Bree


Feb 7 2013, 7:31pm


Views: 611
"For a dragon will guard his pants as long as he lives"

"Robbed of their pants, the dwarves of Erebor wandered the wilderness, a once mighty people brought low."

"Thranduil would not risk the pants of his kin against the pants of the dragon. No pants came from the elves that day, or any day since."

"She had all my pants stuffed in her pockets. Hah ! Dreadful woman!"

...one morning long ago in the quiet of the world, when there was less noise and more green... The Hobbit


Kimtc
Rohan


Feb 7 2013, 7:42pm


Views: 583
This would be Ro.


In Reply To
"Lost my pants twice. Think the elastic is gone. Didin't help that some woman with TORn written on her bodice keeps yanking them down."



L. Ron Halfelven
Grey Havens


Feb 7 2013, 7:43pm


Views: 590
We must away ere break of day, to seek our long-forgotten pants.//

 



"123456!... password!... password1!... password2!... Gimli, do you know Durin's date of birth? Thanks. 140457!... mithril@!... mithril#!... maltbeer!... qwerty!... Legolas, do your elf eyes see any post-its lying around the base of the cliff?"


Kimtc
Rohan


Feb 7 2013, 7:52pm


Views: 595
Legacy pants!

Balin: "You have built a new life for us in the Blue Mountains, a life of peace and plenty. A life that is worth more than all the pants in Erebor."

Thorin: "From my grandfather to my father, these pants have come to me. They dreamt of the day when the dwarves of Erebor would reclaim all their pants. There is no choice Balin, not for me."

Balin: "Then we are with you, laddie. Pantsless though we are, we will see it done."

Bilbo: "For God's sake, just borrow some of mine! And stop walking around my home pantsless!"


SirDennisC
Half-elven


Feb 7 2013, 7:52pm


Views: 577
"... the pants were smaller, and more silent; also this time there were no trolls." //

 


SirDennisC
Half-elven


Feb 7 2013, 7:56pm


Views: 570
"People sang on quays and out of pants." //

 


GloryBox
Bree


Feb 7 2013, 8:15pm


Views: 573
Oh, excellent!

"Dol Zippor" -- love it!

...one morning long ago in the quiet of the world, when there was less noise and more green... The Hobbit


Brethil
Half-elven


Feb 7 2013, 9:14pm


Views: 570
not to point fingers...

...but a likely candidiate! Of course it could be any of us given the opportunity so pot, kettle, etc.

Samwise: There's that Crack of Doom Mr Frodo!

Frodo: Yes, I see. Please Sam, pull up your pants.

And a hearty thanks to Ro for this bit of fun!

...she took the point at once, but she also took the spoons.

(This post was edited by Brethil on Feb 7 2013, 9:19pm)


Roheryn
Tol Eressea

Feb 7 2013, 9:33pm


Views: 556
Ewww!

LOL! Having trouble with the mental imagery of oozy pants and sandy pants, and wondering who inhabits both...


ryouko
Lorien

Feb 7 2013, 9:39pm


Views: 551
You hear that sound?

That's the sound of slash fanfic writers tapping away on their keyboards. Tongue


Rostron2
Gondor


Feb 7 2013, 10:16pm


Views: 555
We have to have...

"This movie is so full of cliched pants, it's absolutely horrid..."


Brethil
Half-elven


Feb 7 2013, 11:06pm


Views: 528
true but...

YOU HAVE TO TYPE IT IN ALL CAPS.

...she took the point at once, but she also took the spoons.


Oin's parasite
Rivendell


Feb 7 2013, 11:09pm


Views: 561
Okay, okay, last ones!

Bilbo: "Ever they delved deeper, down into the pants. And that is where they found it. The heart of the pants. The Arkentrousers. Thrór named them the King’s Pants. He took them as a sign, a sign that his his right to rule was divine."

Bilbo: "The young dwarf prince took work where he could find it, laboring in the pants of men..."

Gandalf: "Well, I’m pleased to find your remember something about me, even if it’s only my pants."

Balin: “Let’s shove this in the pants, otherwise we’ll never get everyone in.”

Ori: "Have they got any pants?”

Saruman: "Do not speak to me of Radagast of the Brown Pants. He is a smelly fellow."
Gandalf: "Well, he's pungent, I'll grant you. He lives a solitary life..."
Saruman: "It's not that. It's his excessive consumption of chille!"

Gloin: "What does he say? Does he offer us insult?"
Gandalf: "No Master Gloin, he's offering you his pants."
Gloin: "Well. In that case lead on..."

Thorin:" You! What were you doing? You nearly got yourself pantsed! Did I not say that you would be a burden, that you would not survive in the wild and that you have no place amongst our pants? I've never been so wrong in all my life."

"I've got parasites as big as my arm!"


SirDennisC
Half-elven


Feb 7 2013, 11:41pm


Views: 531
Win!


Quote
Gloin: "What does he say? Does he offer us insult?"
Gandalf: "No Master Gloin, he's offering you his pants."
Gloin: "Well. In that case lead on..."



Arandiel
Grey Havens

Feb 8 2013, 8:01am


Views: 500
So, which does Thorin wash more often...

I think you can fill in the rest of the question...

Thanks, Ro! Wink


Walk to Rivendell: There and Back Again Challenge - traveling through Middle Earth with thirteen rowdy Dwarves, one grumpy Wizard, and a beleaguered Hobbit

Join us, Thursdays on Main!


BoromirOfWinterfell
Rohan


Feb 8 2013, 12:24pm


Views: 471
These commercials are hilarious!

My stomach hurts from laughing.Laugh

Þæs ofereode, þisses swa mæg - that has passed, so may this.


BoromirOfWinterfell
Rohan


Feb 8 2013, 12:36pm


Views: 475
The first and second ones - absolutely brilliant!

<Gets stomach ulcer caused by continuous bouts of laughter>

Þæs ofereode, þisses swa mæg - that has passed, so may this.


Brethil
Half-elven


Feb 8 2013, 3:34pm


Views: 454
Thank you!

   
Smile
This was fun!

...she took the point at once, but she also took the spoons.


Brethil
Half-elven


Feb 8 2013, 4:18pm


Views: 459
Out of evil comes great good fun!

What if my house be troubled by a rat,
And I pleased to give ten thousand silly posts
To have it baned? What, are you pantsed yet?

If you prick us, do we not bleed Tolkien?
If you tickle us with painful puns, do we not laugh?
If you poison out site, do we not refute ....with underwear?

...she took the point at once, but she also took the spoons.


The White Wizard
The Shire


Feb 9 2013, 1:07am


Views: 436
Hilarious

That is absolutely hilarious! Thank you for providing a bundle of laughs to my day.


Heatherleawv
Bree


Feb 9 2013, 10:55pm


Views: 403
These

have been Hillarious! I finally thought of one, Pants: An Unexpected Journey!

BTW The Star Wars version of this game is very funny!

All that glitters is not gold...


Sauron the Maia
Registered User

Feb 9 2013, 11:01pm


Views: 400
-

The first pants thread I participated in, around 1999, was indeed a Star Wars pants thread.

Darth Vader: "I find your lack of pants disturbing."


Heatherleawv
Bree


Feb 10 2013, 12:48am


Views: 407
So

Funny! Ok, how about this one I sensed your foul pants the moment you arrived on board. Smile
Here's another LOTR one, One doesn't simply walk into Mordor, it's surounded by Pants!

All that glitters is not gold...

(This post was edited by Heatherleawv on Feb 10 2013, 12:53am)


SirDennisC
Half-elven


Feb 10 2013, 2:44am


Views: 341
I think I saw that




NottaSackville
Valinor

Feb 11 2013, 12:56pm


Views: 320
I'll be wearing my Hobbit pants next Thanksgiving. //

 

Happiness: money matters, but less than we think and not in the way that we think. Family is important and so are friends, while envy is toxic -- and so is excessive thinking. Beaches are optional. Trust is not. Neither is gratitude. - The Geography of Bliss by Eric Weiner as summarized by Lily Fairbairn. And a bit of the Hobbit reading thrown in never hurts. - NottaSackville


NottaSackville
Valinor

Feb 11 2013, 12:59pm


Views: 327
As always, this passage was chosen at random from the book:

 


Quote
Although it was not yet very cold, they tried lighting their pants at night, but they soon gave that up. It seemed to bring hundreds and hundreds of eyes all round them.



Proving, as always, that nearly any line of Tolkien can be successfully pantsed.

Notta

Happiness: money matters, but less than we think and not in the way that we think. Family is important and so are friends, while envy is toxic -- and so is excessive thinking. Beaches are optional. Trust is not. Neither is gratitude. - The Geography of Bliss by Eric Weiner as summarized by Lily Fairbairn. And a bit of the Hobbit reading thrown in never hurts. - NottaSackville


grammaboodawg
Immortal


Feb 12 2013, 12:12am


Views: 421
"Good morning! We don't want any pants here, thank you!" //

 



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