Apr 1 2010, 2:39am
...and, per Goodgulf's instructions, [the boggies] headed for the orange-and-green flashing sign at the center of town. There they found a gaudy plexiglas and chrome inn, whose blinking sign portrayed a boar, rampant, devoured by a mouth, drooling. Beneath it was the name of the inn, the Goode Eats & Lodging. Passing through the revolving door, the party signaled the bell clerk, whose nametag read Hi! I'm HoJo Hominigritts! Like the rest of the staff, he was costumed as a suckling pig with false sow's ears, tail, and papier-mache snout.
"Howdy!" drawled the fat boggie. "Ya'll want a room?"
"Yes," said Frito, stealing a glance at his companions. "We're just in town for a little vacation, aren't we, boys?"
"Vacation," said Moxie, winking at Frito broadly.
"Just a little vacation," added Pepsi, nodding his head like an idiot.
"Ya'll sign here please?" said the clerk through his fake snout. Frito took the quill chained to the desk and wrote the names ALIAS UNDERCOVER, IVAN GOTTASECRET, JOHN DOESMITH, and IMA PSEUDONYM.
"Any bags, Mr., uh, Undercover?"
"Only under my eyes," mumbled Frito, turning toward the dining room.
Well! It's not often I get to say "Welcome to TORn" with a quote from Bored of the Rings - thank you for suggesting it!
"I desired dragons with a profound desire"
"It struck me last night that you might write a fearfully good romantic drama, with as much of the 'supernatural' as you cared to introduce. Have you ever thought of it?"
-Geoffrey B. Smith, letter to JRR Tolkien, 1915