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The One Ring Forums: Tolkien Topics: Main: And who would be his psychiatrist?: Edit Log

Guardian of the Galaxy / Moderator

Feb 23 2019, 3:09pm

Views: 10384
And who would be his psychiatrist?

A repost of an old post of mine:

"Good morning, Mr. Gamgee. Ah, yes, a little fidgety today are we? Nervous, a bit? That's quite understandable. Please, have seat on the couch over here. Now, just relax a bit, take a deep breath - that's it - and tell me what has been troubling you."

"Well, ma'm, I'm seeing eyes..."

"Eyes. Ah. Friendly eyes? Sinister eyes? Eyes glowing in the dark?"

"Well, no, it weren't quite dark, 'twas near dusk. I was in a boat..."

"Ah, Samwise, now we've discussed before this little problem you have with boats, haven't we? Anxiety attacks and hypertension - I believe we agreed, it would be best if you did not participate in water-related activities?"

"We did, ma'm but there weren't no getting around this. You see, our Fellowship, we had a bad setback, and them as was in charge said we'd best continue by river for a bit."

"An unfortunate situation, Samwise. I hope you have complained to your travel agent regarding this, and please scrutinize your touring company for dependability before making future arrangements. Do, continue."

"Well, I was sitting in the bow of the boat, looking back over everyone, just sort of gazing at the water..."

"Uh huh - not looking forward - obviously in denial of your stiuation, your unwillingness to face what lay ahead..."

"Um, no, ma'm, just a bit of queasiness from the motion, it was less if I didn't watch the coming swells. Anyway, I saw something, and at first I thought that I was dreaming, sort of drifting off, you know when you're half-asleep how your eyes can play tricks on you. But then I realized I was really was awake, and it weren't no trick of the eyes. I really was seeing it!"

"Seeing - 'it'? Seeing what, Samwise?"

"A log with eyes! They were two pale sort of points, shiny-like, on a hump at the near end of it. And this here log had feet, too, paddle-feet, like a swan's almost, only they seemed bigger, and kept dipping in and out of the water. And it was travelling down the river faster that the boats - it seemed as if it was slowly catching us up!"

"Hmm...and then?"

"Well, then, I sat up and rubbed my eyes, but by then I couldn't catch sight of it no more."

*writes in notebook: Hydrophobia causing paranoia and delusional reactions* "Now, now, Samwise, we both know that a log cannot have eyes or appendages, don't we?"

"But...but these were..."

"You've worked with logs all your life, you know that they are not smooth objects, they show all manner of imperfections. Could it not be, that the 'eyes' you saw were boles or branch-stumps?"


"And these 'feet' were produced by the motion of the current against branches at the lower end, causing them to dip in the water?"


"And, Samwise, you know you are unfamiliar with the flow mechanisms of large bodies of water. Rivers contain eddies, and the shape of the river bottom produces changes in current. Your log could simply have been caught in a faster current."

"Well, maybe..."

"Now, now, what you saw was a log."

"But - but I still think I ought to keep a watch out for..."

*writes down prescription on pad* "Samwise, I do think we're dealing with an old problem here. Since you must travel further down this river, I'm giving you a mild sedative, and recommending that you take a sleep-inducing medication before bedtime. You do want to reach your journey's end well-rested, don't you?"

"Well, I do have to look after Mr. Frodo..."

"There, see, you need to concentrate on your duties. Fears and imaginings will draw your attention away from these, and cause you to be less effective. Try to enjoy the rest of your journey. Once you are away from the river, I'm sure everything will go much better."



"I desired dragons with a profound desire"

(This post was edited by dernwyn on Feb 23 2019, 3:11pm)

Edit Log:
Post edited by dernwyn (Guardian of the Galaxy) on Feb 23 2019, 3:11pm

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